need some reassurance

Ok, this is going to be a long post, so hopefully some of you have some time with the holiday seasons to give me some advice and even just a shoulder. I have been in college for a year and a half now. (community college, doing part time classes going for an RN associates degree) last year, before my surgery, I got all A's and 2 B's. I am a pretty smart person, just naturally, not bragging. School has just come pretty easy to me. After last spring, the day after my final at school, I had my WLS on 5/15. I took the summer off of school of course, and just worked and regained my strength, etc. I started this semester out hard, I tried to take 3 big classes, and realized I couldnt handle it with trying to work full time, so I dropped one class, knowing I would take it this spring by itself basically. I took one class online, and one evening class. The bottom line of this whole semester, I didnt give a SH*T about school or any of it!! My emotions and moods and morale is so out of wack, and so different then last year, I just didnt even care. The evening class was an english one, which is one of my best subjects, so I am pretty sure I got a B in it, as I am a pretty good writer, still need to turn in one late assignment tonight and then find out grade. The online class though, was terrible. Trying to study something and never talking to anyone about it or anything. Well, needless to say it didnt go well. I just found out tonight I got an F in it. ?? !!! Can you believe it? I am ready to crawl into bed and never get up (ok, not totally, but I am prety low right now) I dont even know what to think or anything. I know it was an easy subject, its just the way it was presented, to do an essay on stuff every week was definitely not for me. Exp never seeing anyone or discussing the chapters. So... I have this new dilemma. I have already signed up for the clas that I HAVE to take this semester (To make sure I get into the nursing program) but I could retake this other class as well. I would NOT take it online, but I could take it on an evening, and it is being offered by a professor I had last year, who I had really good luck with, and basically got an A in it for showing up every week, and participating in class and doing some homework. Not much work. But, will I stres myself out too much? I know I have to take it again, I am already going to have to drive to class 3 days a week for this other class, and this one at night would make it 4 days a week (its 35 miles each way to college for me) UGHHHHHHHHH I am ready to cry, honestly! I really hope someone on here can give me some advice, I am almost too scared to talk to my parents (yes, I know I am 25, but my mom is my main babysitter for my son, plus she is kinda my best friend right now, with needing her so much) with christmas in 2 days, I just dont want to wreck it. But I need to know she will watch him those evenings too. and I will have to take care of gas and maintenance for my car and everything. I just wish there was something I could do. But its too late, the professor is gone for xmas. and I dont blame her. I would be too. Well, thanks for reading my post, and thanks in advance for responding, god knows I need it right now. Merry XMas all! Judi D. on the upside, I am down 125 lbs since 5/15, which is good, lol.

Judi, You made a major life change with your WLS. That is going to effect everything. Maybe what was important to you prior to 5/15 is changing how you feel about school. My advice would be to see your acedemic advisor to see what else is an option for you. Good luck! Congrats on 125 pounds gone forever! Stevie H.

Judi, I am old enough to be your monther but am not going to talk to you as one. I went back to school a few years ago & had an experience much like you as far as online classes go. I, too, was an excellent student & had no trouble with regular classes. The online class was a nightmare & I know that many of the students failed it. It was frustrating having the teacher in Des Moines & I was in Cedar Falls. The chats were a nightmare. It was really hard to get anything accomplished. I never knew how I was doing, gradewise, as he never returned graded assignments. It is difficult to know if you need to work harder in this case. However, I did learn something important from the experience. There are many ways to learn & this is just one more way to do it. You are not being spoonfed like many teachers are willing to do. Online classes really require you to be dedicated & a self starter. It is so easy to "forget" to go to a chat, or be late with assignments, or forget to do them at all. Now I am not saying that is what happened to you. You have had big changes this year. Your WLS makes a big change, both physically & emotionally. You have a child to worry about. However, you yourself said, "I didnt give a SH*T about school or any of it!! " You have to change that attitude or you won't finish your studies and I would hate to have you waste the time & money you have already invested. So my suggestions are to commit yourself to working extra hard this next semester to get back on track. See if you can talk with the teacher who failed you to see if there is anything you can do to at least raise it to a passing grade, especially if it isn't something you really need for your nursing. Many teachers are willing to work with you. Someone earlier suggested talking to your advisor. That is an excellent idea. He/she will understand the pressure you are under & may even be willing to go to bat for you with the online teacher to give you extra time, etc especially since this appears to be an isolated experience. Don't give up! It will be worth it even if you do have to drive in an extra time next sememester. Look to the future. It definately is worth it. You have done great things for yourself by having your surgery & by working so hard at college. Oops, maybe I do sound like a mother! Good luck, Judi. We are behind you. Dixie

You don't realize how well you are doing already....You had one bad semester...big deal...buckle down and hopefully you will do better next semester.....I also hear the on-line classes are a challenge.....Of course your mind is elsewhere, with the holidays and such.....I tryed to go back to school this year (also for RN) and I had to quit.....It is so hard being a mom and having a home to take care of and going to school......As far as I can tell you are doing awesome....You are a single parent...you work ....and you are going to school...I didn't have a job(stay at home mom)I have a husband to watch the kids and I couldn't handle it....Give yourself a break.....you are doing a lot....I think you are a very strong and determined person.....relax...start the new semester off, and do what you do best......I am sure your mom knows your situation and will help....she sounds great to......I am 25 and my mom is my best friend too.....It seems once you have kids and have to grow up....the best friends from highschool quit calling as much.....They don't seem to understand you just can't pick up and go to the bar or shopping or whatever! It will get better....just think in 1.5-2 years you WILL be a nurse or whatever.....You will be making more money....and life WILL get easier.....And you will be so happy and confident knowing you did it for yourself and son!!! I really look up to you...I would have just crawled in bed.....lol......Your doing a great job and your son has someone amazing to look up to...Keep on a truckin....you are almost there! Take Care Jesi p.s. are you going to NIACC...I went there in 1996 the first time I went for my RN and dropped out...lol.....Have a great day!

Judi, I was also in your shoes, well sort of I went back to school after I had my youngest son, who is now 8. It was very hard, we had no money and I felt so guilty about having to send my boys to a sitter. I did get quite a bit of support from my mother as well. I also worked a full time job and went to school full time so I never had much time with my sons. I regret that very much. I had a goal in mind and kept pressing towards that knowing that even though it was tough for a short amount of time I was doing it for myself and my family. Since then I have an awsome job that has allowed me to work from my home so I am able to be there for my boys for school activities and summer vacation etc. My grades weren't outstanding in every subject, especially those dumb waste of money electives, but they were very good in the courses that counted to me in the career I was working towards Don't be so hard on yourself and just as my favorite movie character DORRY from Finding Nemo says JUST KEEP SWIMMING JUST KEEP SWIMMING SWIMMING SWIMMING. If ya haven't seen the movie give yourself and your son a treat and rent it. GOOD LUCK and God BLess