a little worry!!!!!!!!!

yesterday i got a call from the school i had to go get my son cuz of his behavior. well when i got their he was in there office crying kicking screaming. it was horrible well after i got him calmed down he told us what happen and what all was wrong. when i met with my dr. in july he told me in front of my kids that i could die and that is all my son heard and now he is so upset that i am going to die. no matter what i say he still hears that i can die. i explained that the dr. had to tell me that. i sit here now and cry cuz of it. my daughter is fine with the surgery and my son wants me to have it but he worries. now after talking to the nurses yesterday i am wandering is all this worth it in my heart i know it is. my brain says well couldnt you do something less life threating. maybe i am nervous and i know i will go threw with my surgery. i wanted to go see my boyfriend before i had my surgery now i cant cuz i have to many things that has to be done before my surgery and dont have money to go. i cant call my boyfriend i can only write him or go see him. yes if you are wandering yes my boyfriend is in prison in anamosa. sshh hope my mom dont come on here and see this she knows he is my friend but not the boyfriend part. he is a good guy. and i love him and that is all that counts. i really wasnt sure if i wanted to have my surgery before christmas. but i thought as soon as i got a date i would run with it. well i am on the spend down with title 19. i went to schedule my physical that i have to have before surgery they told me i had pay up front since of my spend down i have to pay 120.00 for a physical that is bull crap sorry but it is. so now that is taking money from my kids for christmas. money has been tight cuz i have been out of work. if i new i wasnt going to have had this surgery till dec. i would of gotten a job in like june. but my dr. told me to just wait. cuz i would be out of work and noone would hire me knowing i would have to take at least 6 weeks off of work so soon. and i cant borrow money from family again. they are still paying for my back bills from when i had back surgery. i owe them so much money. but i know my kids it isnt what is under the tree. as long as i am home and doing ok. sorry so long. lynda

It is normal to have the doubt feeling before surgery. My family was all scared for me too but if I didn't have the surgery I was going to die from being obese. I wish there was more I could say to comfort you but you have to know in your heart that you are doing the right thing. I wish you all the best! Shelly

thank you ... my family supports me. and if i dont have it i will be in a wheelchair for life. so i pray it will go good. again thank you.... lynda

Hang in there Lynda, Im sure everyone has 2nd thoughts! Keep the Faith girl..... Janet

Hi Lynda, I am so sorry you are having a rough time. My son also had a very hard time with me having surgery, but I gently explained to him that I would always be sick if I didn't have surgery. It is so hard with children because they are not able to fully understand what is going on. I will be praying for you and your family to get through this. Everything will be ok Love, Tammy