You girls are funny!

Hi I'm Deb Paul, and you gals are hilarious! I've been on this site non-stop for about 2 weeks...I'm addicted! I love reading everyone's profiles and reading these posts. I tried the chat room, but i couldn't even read fast enough, let alone type I hope you'll let me chat with you guys. I am going to my PCP on Monday and hope to get a referral. My husband just had his surgery date rescheduled for August 6th in Grinnell with Dr. Schwartz. Why is a lap so much better or worse than open? We have 14 month old twins and I find it unrealistic that I won't lift them for 6-weeks...how long do you have to wait on a lap to lift? I read somewhere that they will not perform a lap on someone that is over a certain weight (320ish)??But I guess I'll have to go to a surgeon who performs laps to see if he would. Here's another question...how many questions can you ask on one post...am I exceeding the limit? Did or will, you tell all your friends and/or relatives you're having it done...or wait until they ask? A part of me still feels shame for having a surgery to loose weight...but I guess I shouldn't care, just make a decision and live with it. Deb

Weclome Deb, I am having surgery Lap and I was told the recovery time is less and chance of hernia are smaller. I am not sure about the lifting part. I have everyone that will listen about my upcoming surgery. I am just so excited You have nothing to be a shames of. It still takes will power, exercise, and alot more pain. Its not going to be smooth sailing and that is what I express to people whom think otherwise. I have found this message board to have the best people

Welcome Deb, I'm having my wls in rochester mn it's going to be open rny , because the surgeon i'm going to iat mayo will not do lap on anyone over 50 BMI . The reason they don't wnat you to lift anything is due to the fact you might tear or pull something out of place. I just told my siblings this past weekend some were happy and others were not too overjoyed by it but that person doesn't know what it's like to obese. Don't feel ashame about the surgery if it makes you live longer and more able to enjoy your twins. Good Luck in whatever decision you make lol....Sheila

Welcome Deb, I am glad we tickle your funny bone. You recover quicker with a lap because of smaller incisions. I had mine open and took off 6 weeks though. Depends on the type of job you have and how long to be off. If you have a desk job, even with open you may get by with 2-3 weeks. However, it isn't necessarily the lifting, but exhaustion. Our youngest son was 18 months old when I had the RNY, but I had a 14 and 16 yr old along with a dh to help out too.

Welcome! My sugery is going to be Lap, I was 325 at my first consult and I'm 315 now , I see Dr.Myrie, he does the Lap sugery up to 340lbs. You can post as many questions as you want, I think we're question/answer addicts. There are few people other than everyone here that I have talked to about my surgery, which consist of my best friend, my brothers and my parents. I'm just not ready to discuss it with everyone, I enjoy my privacy in my everyday life so for some reason, talking to people on here everyday doesnt bother me at all, but if I had people at work asking me questions all day I might get a little annoyed, but that's just me. Someday I might tell them..who knows! Good luck !!

Hi Deb and Paul! I really admire you doing this as a couple! I would definitely want some help with twins, even if it is only a younger niece or nephew who isn't old enough to babysit for them alone, they could free up some of the simpler household chores for you. I would suggest having several step stools around so you could sit down and bring your tots up more to your level. That might make them feel like they are on your lap when the stool is actually supporting more of their weight. They inevitably will want to climb up on you so keep some fluffy pillows closeby too. As far as being embarrased about having surgery.... I am more embarrassed being the way I am. I honestly don't care at this point what other people think. I know I will feel and look better for MYSELF! And YOU will be able to romp and play and be there for your twins for many years to come! Isn't that what it's all about???!!! Just think..... your twins will never remember a fat, sad, low-energy mommy and daddy!!!!!

Good for you both to go through this together! I have young children and I love the fact that I can coach soccer and run around with them now, when before I was always out of breath just walking to the soccer field! I had an open RNY and no complications, my doctor said he could do the Lap but it would take longer and there was a chance that he would end up opening me up anyway. I weighed 312 when I went in for surgery. I did not tell my husbands family until after I had lost a lot of weight, now I am very open about it. I was a little ashamed, although I should not have been. I had someone tell me I was cheating, or taking the easy way out... That is SO NOT TRUE! I had to heal from a major surgery and was forced to change my eating lifestyle, and I have had great success with it! Good luck to you! ~Julie

Welcome Deb and Jason! As you know, we are a helpful bunch here, so ask away and (as the posts show) you will get at least one answer. Again, welcome, glad you are here. Elizabeth

Hi Deb! I was wondering when we'd here from you on here. By the way did you get the email I sent you? (oh this is Jami)ha ha, probably should let you know that. I just have to say that I totally know how you feel with the shame thing. I'm terrible with the shame and guilt. No matter how much I tell myself I shouldn't feel that way, I still do. As far as telling people I've told my husband of course, my family, and my best friend. I knew that all of these people would be supportive, so that's the only reason I chose to share it with them. I think in the first stages of this it's very important to steer clear of those types of people who only want to share "horror" stories about people they say they know who've had bad results. For a very long time I was letting other people's stories scare me away from this. So I really suggest not to tell anyone like that, especially since you have the shame problem like me! And I'm also wondering about lifting our little ones. Boy you have double to lift! I guess I'm lucky in that my Chloe will be 2 in September but still only weighs 20 pounds! I'm really worried about not being able to hold her. We'll see what the doctor says. Anyhow now that I've written another novel...I'm glad to see you here. Email me again soon, I'd love to talk more and see more pics of those adorable kids of yours!

Deb, I almost never come here to read the posts so was really shocked to see you & Jason had made the decision to have the surgery & that Jason is going to have his even before I get to have mine! I am so happy for you both! I am scheduled for September 16 in Cedar Falls and plan on a lap unless something changes. How wonderful that those sweet babies will have parents who not only love them dearly but love them enough to want to be healthy & fit. Now about those babies, just have Barb come & babysit until you can pick them up again. Dixie (Evie's niece)