Do I do it?

Everyone, I need a some serious advice. I've mentioned before my problems with obtaining insurance. Well my husband brought home his insurance application for coverage through his job and I'm thrilled to say there are NO questions pertaining to weight on it!!! YES!!!!!! So of course I'm extremely happy, but......I think I might've also mentioned before that the insurance coverage will cost us over $400.00 a month!! Now don't get me wrong we aren't exactly dirt poor, but I'm a SAHM so we aren't anywhere near well off either. Basically we could probably swing it but we would be absolutely broke. And I mean broke. Luckily we rent from my MIL and we only have to pay $100.00 rent, so that is one good thing. I guess I'm just going through a serious guilt thing right now. Like I said before we really want to buy or rent our own place, but if we have to get the insurance coverage there's no way that's gonna happen. Plus we already barely have enough money to go around the way it is now. I can't imagine how it would be with another four hundred plus gone a month. I keep feeling so bad that I've gotten myself to this point to have to do something so drastic. I feel like a failure having to use money that should be going for the good of our family, and not to surgery because I can't lose weight. I know I shouldn't feel this way because no one in my family does. My husband says we should just go for it and we'll make do however we can. I know he's right but I'm still confused. I kind of think maybe I'm just being scared and using this all as an excuse not to have to change. Even though I want a "normal" life back more than anything. I am SO petrified that I will go through with this, put my family through this, and then fail. I couldn't live with that. Deep down I know I should just get the insurance because it's worth it. And the money is actually going for good because it's literally going to save my life, Right? Ugghh, I'm so confused right now. I want this so badly but everytime I get close to having a chance I get scared. Please guys I need advice!! Sorry for the novel of a post again but ya know how I am. ; )

Whatever makes you happy. Did you read my post below?

If you really want this, and your husband supports you and says to go for it, I'd do it. In the long run you're going to be healthier and happier. You can always change insurance companies later, however, you're going to run into anything pertaining to your weight will not be covered; like your follow up visits.

The only person who can make a decision like this is you... what is good for one person isn't necessarily good for another. My insurance rates are right there at the $400+ mark. My out of pocket limit is $4500... in a nutshell..my insurance SUCKS..but it's there .. and it will help. When i was a stay at home mom...i did babysitting...and you could easily babysit part time and get $400 a month to cover your ins. if that's an option for you. Just a suggestion. I know ALL about the scared thing... im 3 days and a wake up from my surgery....and ive went from scared..to peaceful.. back to scared.. lol.. it's a rollercoaster ride.. but it's one I've chosen to take...and I will be better for it. Be glad that you have a supportive husband....so do i..but some are not as lucky. God Bless ~~Dawn from Duncombe, IA~~

Jami- the most important thing is that you have your families support. Its time to sit down and write up a serious budget, try to consolidate your debt, trim corners, etc...Everything worthwhile has a price to pay, a sacrifice to make. My last job I was paying over $500 a month for family ins coverage and I know people who pay even more! I don't know where its going to end! I am so lucky because I now work in a hospital and their coverage is fantastic for less than $200 a month. Explore your options- there may be more than you think you have! Good luck! Michelle

Oh you guys, thanks so much for your support. I just really don't know what to do. I guess I'm just so scared on so many levels. I don't want to have no money all the time, but I don't want to be fat anymore either. And I've been thinking that I could handle a year or so of being broke more than I could stand a lifetime of being fat. Like someone else said, everything that's worthwhile usually requires some sacrifice. I just don't know if I should do it now or not. I keep thinking maybe if I wait it out a year or two maybe my husband will get a better job with cheaper insurance. But more likely than not he'll still be at this job with this same insurance. So, I don't know. Then I am lucky enough to rent from my MIL, no matter how much I hate it sometimes! It's not like she'll throw us out if we can't make our rent one month. So at least I don't have to worry about that. I think I just need to get over the guilt trip I'm going through. I think I'm really just so scared of having to tell everyone what I'm going to do. I can't even imagine what my in-laws will say. I just feel so stupid having to do this, even though I don't think I should feel that way. If my MIL who's also overweight told me she were doing it I'd think "great for her"! So I have no idea why I'm so ashamed of myself. Who knows. I'm just always going from one extreme to the next. One minute I'm doing it the next I find some excuse not to do it. So what's going on with me? Isn't it weird that I'm having such a hard time going through with something I want so much? UGGGGGGHHHHHH, I just don't know!

Hi Jami I don't know if you would qualify or not, but here in Iowa, if you need a medical procedure or problem dealt with, you can apply for title 19 and when (or if) you get a denial, you can go to your local court house and get "state papers" Most of the time you have to go to Iowa City to cover the procedure, but it might be worht a shot to check into. Just a suggestion. Elizabeth

Jami.. get the insurance.. if not just for WLS but for the other things that can come up in our lives.. I had emergency surgery in April for my appendix.. I am kicking myself for not having insurance at that time because now I am looking at about 9,000 in hospital bills.. you never know what can happen.. for your own safety and peace of mind get the insurance.. and good luck on getting your WLS .. you wont regret the small sacrifices now in the long run

Dawn B- thanks for the advice. What you said really made sense and hit home with me. Especially what you said about the little sacrifices. I really think you're right on with that. My Grandma who I adore pretty much told me the same thing tonight. She said to just "get the damn insurance and quit worrying about it!" So I think that's pretty much where I'm at right now!