HEARTBROKEN and HOPELESS

Well I unfortunately received bad news today. I had applied for insurance coverage(husband's was too expensive), and I've been waiting to hear back. Well today I got a letter stating that if I wanted to have any coverage,that because of my WEIGHT I would have to pay a 50% premium increase. Okay so that's bad but I could deal with that. Then I see that I have to sign papers saying that NOTHING to do with my weight will ever be covered. This includes surgery. I cannot believe this, I am honestly floored. My mom kept telling me that they wouldn't give me insurance, but I guess I really thought they just had to. That probably sounds stupid but I didn't think they could do something like that! I am SO let down that I cannot even put into words how bad I feel. The only way I've been getting through everyday anymore is knowing that with the surgery I might have another chance to lose this weight and have my life back! So now what do I do? I'm 24 years old I cannot live the rest of my life this way. But I know I cannot lose the weight on my own. So what are my options now? I am a SAHM with one young daughter and my husband has a decent paying job but not enough for me to finance surgery. We're just barely making ends meet now. And I highly doubt we could get a loan, and even if we could we need to buy a house. So how can I take out a loan for this surgery when my family needs to buy a house? I know that I should do "whatever it takes" to get the surgery but I just don't know if I have any choices left. Please does anyone have any suggestions? Anyone who self-paid PLEASE let me know all you can about it. I would really really appreciate it. Also about this insurance thing. The company I applied to was Wellmark BC/BS. How did anyone else get covered through them. I mean was I stupid to put down that I weighed 265 and am five foot one? I just thought I had to. I don't understand how one could get insurance coverage unless you started out a normal weight with that insurance company and then got morbidly obese. I don't think that's usually the case, right? So if anyone could let me know if I might have a chance with any other insurers please let me know. By the way my husband's benefits will be starting soon. Since it was too expensive we weren't going to take it(it's BC/BS Wellmark same as I applied for), it was cheaper for me to apply right through the company. Do you think it might be possible for me to apply through my husbands work even though it's the same insurance company? I mean, do you suppose they would ask all the same weight questions etc.? Sorry this is probably confusing, but I just really need some advice. Thanks guys and sorry for such a long post!

Jami I'm so sorry, that's terrible. Well...I have BC/BS, and it is through my employer. Normally with insurance plans that you get through your work, there's no underwriting like there would be if you just applied on your own. So with my BC I just signed up for it and I was insured, no questions asked, no pre-existing conditions. So you may just still have hope if you apply thru your husbands work. (the reason for this difference is usually the difference between an individual plan and a group plan. With the group plans, the rates are going to be based on a group, so the employees at your husbands work, so everyone is just automatically covered because you work for that group. If you apply as an individual family not thru am employer, they have to ask medical questions and possibly have medical tests to see if they will insure you because those rates are going to be based on your own families medical history.) Have your husband ask his Human Resources Representive or check an employee handbook, it should probably tell you if there would be pre-existing conditions or any underwriting. Hope this helps....I wish you luck!! ~Kelly

Jami, SO Sorry about the turn down . I've been there I'm with BC/BS alliamce Select thru my employer. Get onto your husband policy there usually isn't any preexisting clause. On group policy it alot easier to get by the red tape...Good Luck I'll be praying for you... Don't lose faith .

Thanks guys. I feel much better now that I've found out I might have a chance at coverage through my husband's job. I'm just so worried though because it's so expensive. I just keep thinking that it's worth it in the long run. But it will be well over $400.00 a month for us to be insured. But when I think about how much the surgery costs if you selp pay, and how much I truly need it then the four hundred a month doesn't seem like much. But then I think of the fact that we really need a bigger house, etc. all that stuff. But my wonderful sweet husband thinks that I shouldn't worry about all that and just go for it. I wish I felt that way. I just feel so guilty using my family's money for surgery because I'm fat. I know for a fact that I cannot lose this weight any other way, but I still feel guilty. I just keep thinking, if I could just be like a normal person and get off my butt and exercise and eat right then my family could be putting that money towards a house payment. But no, here I am almost 300 pounds and now I just feel like worthless because I've gotten to this point. I know it's stupid to feel that way but I still do. I'm trying very hard to make myself believe that I'm worth it, it's just really hard sometimes. I was so caught up in the idea of getting the surgery and starting over again, and now I just don't know. I'm really just praying a lot and hoping I can figure something out. I just have to thank everyone for this support and for this wonderful place for all of us. Never in my life have I ever felt so comfortable and at home as I do here. We're very lucky to have a place like this webiste! Keep your fingers crossed for me and say a few prayers too if you'd like!

I don't know what kind of finances you have, but there is help at the state level with health insurance premiums if you have children on title XIX. The state sends my husband a check that covers what his employer deducts from his check every other week, it adds up to $140 a month. It comes in handy, let me tell you. This might not apply to you, but I thought I would mention it. It is called the Health Insurance Premium Program, or HIPP plan. Good luck, it has to be really hard knowing that you are only waiting for usrgery because of insurance... medical care should be cheaper so people can afford it! As far as your comment about not telling the truth on the application, I bet they would have figured out a way to deny it anyway, if they had that stipulation in the paperwork regarding surgery. Keep us updated, take care!! ~Julie

Jamie, so sorry to hear about the insurance woes. There is a lawyer that helps people with insurance approval of WLS and his name escapes me now, but let me do some searching. He has a web site too. I will find out and let you know. My DHs grandma used to live in Kensett on the edge of town, but she moved to the Sheffield Care Center in residential living in December.

go to www.obesitylaw.com it is a sister to this site. I can't remember the name of the guy either, but it is there. Hope this helps. Elizabeth

Thanks again for the support everyone. Julie, I remember hearing something about the program you're talking about. My daughter isn't on title 19, but she is in the hawk-i state insurance program. I think I'm going to try to check on it. Any extra to help towards the huge premium would be a big help. As far as the lawyer goes, I couldn't afford to go there. My husband and I have been talking a lot about our situation lately. He seems to think that if I can get coverage through his job then I should go for it. He said that there's no amount of money that's too much when it comes to making me happy. Is he great or what? I still feel guilty about having to shell out so much money, but his insurance premiums through his work are high for everyone, not just me. So whether I had the surgery or not the premiums would still be high so I really don't have any reason to feel bad. So I'm just going to keep waiting to find out if I can get covered under his plan at work. Then if they will cover me then I still have to try to get approved for the surgery, but we'll just do one step at a time here! Boy does this all get overwhelming. All I can say is it's a sad, sad world we live in now when people have to choose between making a house payment or paying for healthcare!!! So keep those fingers crossed for me while I check on that HIPP program! I'll let everyone know as soon as I find out about my dh's insurance!!!!! Pray for me!