I'm new and just needed some words of encouragement.

Aloha Everyone,

I have been following this message board for about 3 months now.  I really love it that I have a place to come and wala'au with local people about WLS.  Everyone on here is so loving and caring about one another. 

My doctor is Dr. Lapschies and I have yet to find anyone on here that has had him as a doctor.  My surgery is in 7 days at Queens and I am shaking just thinking about it.  I finally told my mother that I was having the procedure and she keeps telling me I'm going to regret it and how bad it is...I love my mother and would never want to disappoint her.  This is more the reason I am having second thoughts about the surgery.

Could someone please give me words of wisdom?  Should I bring anything with me to the surgery?  How long was the hospital stay?  Does anyone have any regrets?

Much Mahalos~
AJ

Wow in seven days.....I will pray for you...my surgery was two years ago, easter weekend.....and I can't believe how fast the time has gone and how happy I am that I did it...I was 307 when I started the journey and now am l98.....and floating back and forth with five pounds....but what is five pounds?  lol....lol...now I am sorry it took so long for you to tell your mom, do you have any other support for you?  did you go to classes for the surgery that your doctor is going to do?  The place I went to had a six month program so we got allot of support from other pre ops.....I will be happy to be your Angel ....(meaning you can write me anytime and I will be glad to be your peer support................no I don''t live in hawaii,,but will be there for the month of November....by then you have realized what a good move you made by having surgery......I am 57 years old and now feel like 40..............(i'm being kind to myself)     any exact questions you have please ask me and if I can help, I will...................my direct email address is    [email protected]  please let me know how you are doing and again anything at all you want to ask, I will tell you from my experience  what happened with me.....I will tell you right now. I had four people who thought I shoudn't do this, and if only I could give up the the food now, I wouldn't need the operation, well since I had my surgery....three out of four of them .....they had the surgery...............and the last one is going in the next month.....all were against it, and now they are eating their words to me...it is a personal choice, only you know how you feel daily, and you will feel like a million buckis with weight off...............................
Lois

there will always be ppl who will say negative things about this surgery..always thats just the way it is...be strong and do what u want..u will be fine...dotn bring too much at the hosptial..u wont need much...i just brought my book and journal and toiletries..good luck

 I haven't heard anything about Dr. Lapschies but since he's at Queens, I would think he's very good.  That hospital has such a good reputation.  I also understand being nervous.  I had lapband on 3/18 and was really scared before.  Just know that your doctor and his staff, as well as the hospital, are all very supportive so take advantage of them.  Ask questions, lots of them.  Even if you ask the same question over and over, ask.  This is your body and your journey, so do whatever you can to help ease your concerns.  I'm so sorry your mother isn't supportive.  I'm assuming you are having RNY so I don't know how the recover is, and I won't lie to you that it will be easy.  You'll have many many changes to go through, but that's the whole purpose of the surgery, right?  And you won't be alone.  We'll all be here for you and as I mentioned above, your doctor will be a wealth of information and support.

As for what to take to the hospital, just the very minimum.  Loose clothes to wear home, personal toiletries, and a pillow to snuggle to your tummy on the way home.   Maybe a good book and a journal.   My stay was 2 days - the day of the surgery then left the following day.  RNY may take longer, don't know.  And no, I don't have any regrets.  The first week was really rough, but once I got the hang of things and was able to eat food that wasn't liquid, I was a happy girl.  

So hang in there, sweetie!  We are all pulling for you.  You'll do well and soon be really healthy.

Hugs to you,
Barb

Congratulations on your surgery day!  It really is an amzing journey. 

Nerves are always a part of it and it's hard when you have loved ones that don't support you.  I've found that when people object, it's normally because they aren't educated enough and think about the horror stories from the past.  Maybe if you have your mom speak to your surgeon or someone at the hospital, give her some literature to read, or have her come on to this sight and see other people's experiences, it might help her be more informed and understanding.

As far as your surgeon, I'm not sure if it's the same one, but Nala1213 had his surgery at Queens several weeks ago.  Maybe you could message him and see how his experience was?

I absolutely have NO regrets.  I can tell you it's not the "easy" way out and it is still work to lose the weight, but, without this surgery, I would have gone back to my bad eating habits months ago!  I wouldn't have lost the weight that I have and I would still be miserable in my body and life.

Best of Luck AJ!!!!!

If there is anything I can do for you please don't hesitate to message me :)

Aloha AJ!   I grew up in Hawaii and will always consider it my home.  But I do have some suggestions for you.   As for your mom,  you should take her to meet your surgeon and let her ask him questions.  Alot of people remember stories of "stomach stapling" from years ago.  Todays surgeries are much different.  They know so much more than they used to.  And the patients know more than they used to.  Also, you should go to support group meetings regularly.  They are awesome.  They can really be informative and inspiring.  It would be  a really good idea to take mom with you.   Part of her negative feelings may be due to the fact that she was not let into the process of your decision at the beginning and found out at the end.  She may feel slighted and left out of something so important to you.  Which then will make a person rebel.  I know, I did that to my sister.  I was afraid to tell her that she would be against it.  So I waited.  I know now that I should have included her, she would have learned alot like me and could have been my biggest supporter.  Since I told her, she has done alot of research on line and has been supportive, but she is watching me closely.  Your mom will probably come around if you try to include her more.  Make her feel like she matters.  
Sorry, I get carried away sometimes.  Good luck!   Congratulations on your surgery!  You will be glad you did it.  Its the best.  I am already off diabetes meds and 2 blood pressure meds!   Take care and you can PM me anytime if you like.   Your friend,  Eldy

Aloha AJ-
Congratulations on making one of the biggest and best decisions in your life to being a healthier and happier you. What surgery are you having?

The questions you're asking should also be answered by your doctor. Just ask him and I am sure he will ease your mind. They should provide you with a list of things for you to bring, tell you how long you should expect to be in the hospital (everyone is different), and what you can expect. I always believe that knowing what to expect relieves anxiety to a large degree.

Read and study about your procedure and recovery. Learn everything there is to know about it and most of all be confident! Read profiles.... they help, too! It will be exciting!!! I also agree that getting your mom involved with your pre-op consultations with your doctor will help ease her fears as well. I am sure she is just being a caring mother and is, of course, worried about you. Knowledge is one of the greatest cures of fear. Learn together!

No regrets here, by the way!
Malama pono!

You will be fine.  There was a few ladys here that went to Dr. Lapschies and they did just fine.  Congrats on your up and coming surgery!

Aloha,
Asia

Aloha All,

Thank you everyone for your kind words and encouragement.  I really appreciate everything you said and my mother has come around.  I am approx 3 days post and i feel like absolute pooy.  But reading the other posts i know it is bound to get better!!

Thank you all so very much...I will be sure to keep you posted.

Mahalo,
AJ

Well, by now you have had your surgery.  I haven't looked at this site for a while, but I noticed your post.  Also by now you must know that you have one of the best surgeons around.  I had Dr. Lapschies put in my lapband almost 5 years ago.  My surgery went very smoothly, no complications, no regrets.  Well actually my only regret is that I didn't have the surgery sooner.  So I hope everything is going well and that you are feeling good.

Aloha, Paula Aurio