Help with indecision...

I have been thinking about having surgery for 6 months now and cannot seem to just take the plunge and do it. I went to an information seminar, and I have 3 friends who swear they would do it again in a heartbeat. What is my problem? I think I am scared and sad when I think about all the things I cannot have after surgery. I knew my addiction and love of food was deep, but so much that I would not take advantage of something that could save my life? Anyone else have an issue like this? I also have diabetes,sleep apnea, hypertension, high cholesterol, and depression. I take more medication than my grandparents. That is just not right. What is wrong with my thinking?

Robin... Nothing is wrong in your thinking...we all went through that period of indecision...or at least I did...then one night went to dinner with a girl friend of mine...we overheard another couple's conversation, and the guy was saying that his wife had just had the gastric bypass surgery, was doing really good with it...and that was when I told my girl friend that I was going to have the surgery...Another one of my girl friends has a daughter that had the surgery the year before, and was doing very good with her weight loss...and those two things were the 'clincher' for me to have it done...If I had to do it all over again, I would do it in a heartbeat...it was the best present I ever gave myself!!! Just to let you know, I was a 'cash pay' patient...insurance did not cover my surgery at all...and it has been well worth the $$ that I had to pay. A lot of my indecision had to do with the $$ issue. The comorbidities that I had were sleep apnea and high cholesteral, and probably depression too.. Just wanted to let you know that you are 'normal' in your thinking...as it is a life changing surgery, but I am so happy that I did it. Norma

Thank you for your kind words. May I ask how long since your surgery? Any complications or regrets? I know from my friends that the weight loss was the motivation to keep them going. I am just afraid of failing again.

Robin, My surgery was 6/20/05, and never had any regrets...did develop diverticulitus before Christmas...but that has since cleared up...Present weight loss is at 103 pounds...My highest weight was 251, and this morning when I weighed it was 147.8. Norma

This is an extremely personal decision for everyone involved. (And yes this decision involves everyone in your life - friends, family and everyone who is involved with you in any way.) The clincher for me was watching BOTH parents die younger than they should have from obesity related issues. I knew I was headed down the same path even though I was HEALTHY as an ox going into surgery...I didn't have ANY comorbidites. I'm healthier now than I was then if you can explain that one! (probably because I'm a gym rat now!!!) I have ABSOLUTELY no regrets....though I have times of being sick and I'm almost 2 years out. I started at 350 lbs and am now weighing in at 164 post tummy tuck. (And still swollen) If you are addicted to food you need to go to counseling along with continuing to consider having this surgery. Remember, it is not that you can never have the foods you love again (I'm speaking now that I'm 2 years out) it's just that you may have to wait a while and then monitor the AMOUNT you eat.......there's a phrase being thin is better than any food tastes!!!! Good luck with your decision.... Dee Dee

Robin, we all went through this decision making and its hard.Its only a decesion that you and only you can make. Read my story I had alot of complications and I would tell you I would do it all over again... I had diabetes,sleep apnea, depression which I still have but I deal with it alot better I also had asthma really bad and its all gone but the depression...So nake this a personal decision.. Dawn need someone to talk to let me know have you chosen a doctor yet....

Hey Robin - I'm in Clarkesville (hey neighbor!) and have battled with indecision for over two years now. I kept telling myself that the surgery was riskier than living with my weight. What "did" it for me was finding out that my liver is already considered 'fatty' from a CT scan that I had done over a year ago, and that I may have NASH - a liver condition. My surgeon (at that time it was for an incisional hernia from a c-section) told me, and I quote "if you don't have bypass surgery, you will not live to see your kids grow up". Then he told me about a patient of his that was lying in a bed at Emory right then dying because she DID have NASH, and had had the bypass done, but only after her liver had gotten so bad that the bypass couldn't really help it. Of course, I bawled my eyes out right there in front of him and his nurse, but I guess it was the kick in the pants that I really needed. I too love food. In fact, it was my best friend during my childhood and teenage years. I will miss a lot of it, but...you can't eat if you aren't alive to enjoy it. I mean, cheesecake is my weakness, but is cheesecake worth my life, NO WAY! If you want, PM me sometime and we can chat more. I have sleep apnea (just found out) as well and high triglycerides but luckily no diabetes or hypertension. I have been depressed off and on, but nothing that requries medication. I'm seeing Dr. Procter in Gainesville. Have you started the process at all? I have my (hopefully) last appointment next week with the nutritionist and then barring any other appointments it should be submitted to insurance. I'm excited because this will be a life change for not only me, but my husband and our three children. It's like I'm not only going to be getting a new lease on my life, but my family will be healthier too because I'll be eating and cooking healthier. I'm not under any dissalusion that it's going to be a walk in the park, since I do love food, but I have a great support system and know that I'll have a lot of help. Julie

Julie I had cheesecake last night (lol) no kidding! Of course before surgery I would have had the whole piece and be eyeing a second piece instead of eating just 3 bites. Now just so you know I can eat anything and not dump so not everyone will be able to eat a few bites of cheesecake. I guess I am lucky (or UNLUCKY if you get my meaning). Kia

Robin, I was just like you. I found the decision to have on not to have WLS to be one of the most difficult decisions I had to make in my entire life. I sure did take time.... about 5 years or so. Finally I had it done 7 months ago.... And I've had very good outcome, with no complications, easy recovery, and good weight loss so far. I have nothing to complain about at all, and would do it in a blink of an eye all over again. It's a life changing procedure in more than one way.... it's nothing to rush through. take your time. work your issues out. Be informed. Take charge of this whole process. Find a good Doctor that you trust. talk to people. be open, but understand that it should be Your decision. Wishing you the best of luck. Rita 08/08/05 255/184/160

Thank you so much...I have had more support and understanding from this post than the whole 6 months thinking about it. Do not get me wrong, I have the most loving family and friends in the world, but they are not overweight. They cannot understand how I could be so weak and not just pull myself up by my bootstraps and lick this thing. I guess if it were alcohol or drugs or tobacco, it would be more understandable. But addiction to food?? I truly thin****il you live with being 250 pounds and at the end of your rope, you cannot understand. But I also understand they do not want me to die or be worse off than I am. Thank you for all your answers and help. I have been to the informational seminar and called for a consultation with Dr. Richards in Gainesville. I have heard nothing but good things about him. He operated on 2 of my friends. So I will keep you informed. Still scared, but not alone!