When does it stop?

I have had my weight off before but it was so long ago and never stayed off. My question is: When does the feeling of being watched and talked about stop? I have to use a larger than average wheelchair to go places and people look at you when it won't fit through the doorway. When we are at a restaurant, people look at you and laugh like you don't need to be eating. The other night we were out and I heard someone say, "she wants to make everyone think her weight isn't from eating since she is eating so little, like that can happen!" I was so mad it took all I could not to go over and ask them what their problem was. I was getting ready to say I can lose my weight, can you lose your ugly?, but I didn't. Since my weight has never stayed off (I intend for it to this time) what is a different way to answer these idiots who make fun of us? Thanks for your help. Hugs, Debra

I am so sorry you are going through this. I made myself a promise as a post-op...if anyone says anything nasty to me about my weight...I would certainly be saying something to them. Luckily, even when I was at 348, I didn't have but one person ever say anything to me. It hurt my feelings very much...I promised I would never let someone walk over my emotions again. Go ahead and take a stand. People assume that us fat people have no balls! Don't be afraid to show yours! Hugs! Sherry

Thank you Sherry. I will say what I think next time. hahaha Are you on the Georgia group too? I thought your name looked familiar. Hugs, Debra

Sorry Sherry, my mind has left me. Forget the question about the Ga board, I thought I was on the main board. No brain left. Thank you and just over look me. Hugs, Debra

Debra Try to remember that people that intentionally strive to hurt others by saying mean and vicous things are just plain ignorant. As we all know a person's ignorance is a way of that person covering up for something they see as a negative about themselves. I have chosen to ignore the people in life that seemingly want to attack others about weight issues. After all we are doing something positive about our weight. By the way you will not fail in this weight loss venture. Carolyn

Thank you for the words of encouragement. I appreciate it very much. Hugs to all, Debra

There are so many people that have nothing better to do than insult and hurt others. Personally, I would have said something to them but that doesn't make it right. Find comfort in the fact that you are doing something for yourself and regardless of others thoughts and preceptions you and your loved ones are what matters. Besides being healthy and happy again are the best incentive to keep on keeping on. The ignorance of people never stops but what goes around comes around so I feel sorry for them and happy and proud for you! Hugs and prayers, Theresa

You know Debra, People that have a tendency to put other people down, have pretty poor self images themselves and are looking for ways to distract others from their own shortcomings. I KNOW how painful that comment must have been, as I have endured many in my time. Just try to keep in mind that comment came from a very shallow person, and at least you can look at yourself inthe mirror in the morning each day! You hang in there, and keep coming here to visit with us, and for every ugly thing said to you, we will make it up with other NICE things about you! I'm sorry someone was so ugly to you.. -Tami

Thank you all so much for your help with this. I know what I should do but it helps to hear others ideas when this happens. I love everyone in thsi group and look forward to meeting you all att eh Oct 9 meeting. (wherever it is going to be!) Hugs and Love to all, Debra

Hi, Debra, I responded one time to an uncle who made a comment at my sister's wedding. "Becky, you've gotten so big, I didn't recognize you." When I finished, he definitely did not show up at the reception. Well, I ended up calling him and apologizing. No matter how good it felt at the time, the guilt afterward wasn't worth it. (This kind of sounds like something I've heard before.) Don't lower yourself to their level. I would however probably stare them down. I would want to say, "Bless your heart, you're so dumb, you don't realize that I can hear you! If you know better, then you are just rude." Don't do it, just come on here and vent! Hugs, Becky