Can we please KILL the negativity on the boards

I hardly EVER post, but felt the need to today.  For the sake of persons who are here for support, information, and encouragement..... Can we PLEASE halt with all the negativity on the message board.  I have been a "lurker" since July.  I went to my first meet and greet in August.  I attended my first support group in September.  This board and the wonderful people that I have met at the meet and greets and support meetings have helped me TREMENDOUSLY.  They have given me insurance info, surgury info, OPINIONS of surgeons, and overall support that has been priceless.  I am so appreciative of all that has been given to me via this OH Georgia board.   

The last couple of weeks has brought such an abundance of negative posts.  I am really surprised, had I seen all of this when I first started to research in August, I WOULD NOT HAVE LOGGED ON AGAIN, and would have missed all of the wonderful information and people I have met.  If someone is logging on for the very first time, they very well could look at all of this DRAMA and decide that this site is not here for what WE can give them (SUPPORT, people).  We are all intellegent, opinionated ADULTS with our own views, and our own preferences.  WE CAN AGREE TO DISAGREE. 

I personally can not be "bombarded" by anyones opinion, I continue to research DAILY for what is best for ME.  No matter how many times a person "encourages" their type of surgery, or OPINIONS of a surgery or surgeon, we are all ADULTS and ultimately make our own ADULT decisions.   

I first time I attended a meet and greet, (@ 400 Bowling Alley), after we all bowled and everyone had gone home, I had a wonderful conversation (we sat on recliners in a circle) with Ginger (RNY), Laura (sleeve) and Lashelle (DS).  They each gave me there opinions of the surgery they choose, discussed their progress, how they felt about thier surgeons---- EVERYTHING!!!!  It was wonderful.  Debra (lapband) actually went with me to my first surgeon informational seminar.  Izzy/talksoup slp (RNY) guided me step by step through all of my insurance questions and concerns to make sure I had coverage for WLS with SHBP.  Rolanda (RNY) persoanlly introduced me to her surgeon, insurance coordinator, and an given me a weath of knowledge.  As I considered going out of the country, Tonya (sleeve) gave a personal account with a two hour converastion over the phone, of her experience.  These are all people who I met on THIS board, who have gone out of their way to help me. 

I would HATE for someone to see us calling each other "*****es" and "calling others out"----- and feel this is a board of CHILDISH drama, he-say--she-say, finger pointing, MISINFORMATION, cyberbullies, or anything other then what we are here to be------ and that is SUPPORT. 

I am asking--- Can we all JUST get along???
Tiffany

                                             

Well stated Tiff. I have also received and given support to so many on here that I will cherish for life.   And the drama is a bit much. Funny thing is the people that seem to take it to a whole nother  level are people who don't even frequent the GA board or any of the OH activities offline.

If someone on here bugs you block them. They magically disappear from your cyber world forever.

Unless you're one of those weird people that log in as a guest to see what a blocked person is typing. Now why you would want to see what a blocked person types perplexes me, but whatever???  Like,  1. you annoy me to no end, 2. I disagree with everything you say, 3. you're the most horrible person on OH I know... but please don't block me so you can keep annoying me.  

                                                          Makes perfect sense huh?
Last thing I want to be is a thorn in anyone's side, so please, please, please, don't allow me to upset you (not you Tiff, just folks in general). I really am not that important. Or, am I? Hmmm??? 

Personally I am having too much fun being thinner and happier to even care about the crazies on here.  It takes a lot to offend me, even more to upset me, especially when it comes from someone I've never met and will likely never meet.

I just spent the last couple of hours trying to find a loophole in the system to get Medicaid for a dying 6 month old baby with an adrenal tumor that has grown into her liver. The tumor can't be removed because it's too large and they are trying to shrink it with chemo, and the liver has to come out and they can't find a donor. 

When you put it in perspective being called a ***** by a stranger on OH is really trivial you know?  I won't lose any sleep about this OH crap, but I do think I will see that baby's face in my dreams tonight.  She is just too cute.  Too cute to be dying...


Love, Peace, and Hair Grease to All !!!
See ya next Saturday at the support meeting at Henry Medical!


~LaShelle

It sure is hilarious that a certain person can say that all people are welcome to come to any meet and greet. But when she was asked not to bring a surgery war to a STATE board for the 2nd time, she gets all huffy and decides to block not only me but my SO.  She was also the one when a person had questions about RNY surgery brought many people from the damn DS board over to the GA board....that is so damn uncalled for.  If he wanted to find out about the DS, then it is his perogrative to research that type of surgery....not for everyone to storm him all about it.  There was only one person who made a very valid argument about the DS over the RNY...and that was that she was already taking NSAIDS for another medical issue, and RNY patients can not take those type of meds. 

Also, she cant seem to understand the abbreviation of SO...she seems to think that means 'married', even after she was corrected the first time around.  So dont talk to me about bringing negativity to this board.  She was the one that started it in the first place!!!  Don (LostTxn) was calling her out, and had every right to do so.

I totally agree, I haven't posted in a long time and have really needed moral support over the last 5 months but I was turned off by so many negative un supportive comments. For those of us that come here for support and info when we see these things we do run away I know I did. But I'm back and have learned to ignore the people on here who are still miserable on the inside even though their outside has chagned.

Renissa, it's good to see you posting.  When you are on a puplic online forum that's open to thousands of people, you are bound to find people you click with and those you don't.   Just don't let a few people, me or anyone else turn you off and keep you from getting the support and information you need. 

You should try to make it to the Meet and Greet Izzy is hosting this month. Maybe you'll meet a new wls buddy.   I see you are pre-op.  I'm not sure if you chose a surgeon yet, but even if you haven't check with a wls surgeon's office near you to see if they have a support meeting you can attend if you're not interested in an OH support event.  This is a very hard process to deal with by yourself, and you deserve to have good people in your corner to walk with you through it.

So agree!!

Luckily, I've met some wonderful people on here and actually got to meet one of my OH friends in person.

I can't speak for this board but when I first had my lap-band, I found that many people on that forum would tell me how their surgeon said eating certain foods was okay when mine said it wasn't. That they could (fill in the blank) when mine didn't. Many WLS patients look for the loop-holes in their post-op care instead of following their surgeon's instructions. I really didn't want to have complications and then tell my surgeon "but someone online told me I could!" So I sort of took the stance... take what works and ignore the rest.

When you meld all of the different surguries by geographic location, some people feel the need to focus on the differences instead of the similarities. We ALL have to measure portions, we all have to drink enough water, get our protein in, chew slowly, take small bites, make healthy eating decisions and try to include more physical activity into our lives as the weight comes off regardless of the surgery we have.

The #1 issue that all WLS patients face in years 3+ post op is weight regain. That's because they don't change their lifestyles. They continue eating the same foods they ate before surgery (just smaller portions), they don't measure their portions so they slowly stretch their smaller pouches and eat more and more and they don't change their sedentary lifestyles to include more activity. If we always do what we always did, we'll always get what we always got. What makes this journey any different?

I think we should all remember that we're in this together. That it doesn't matter which surgery you chose. There's a way to eat around all of them. No WLS will make you buy healthy foods at the grocery store, order healthy off a menu or make you go exercise when you don't feel like it. All they do is help you with portion control We have so much that we need to do mentally to be successful in the long run. Surgery is just a tool. If you don't use your tool wisely, it's not very effective is it?

CAN WE ALL JUST GET ALONG!!!!!!!!!!!

I agree 100%.  Whatever type of Surgery you choose to have is yours and your Doctors decision.  If you ever have any questions just PM me.

I will always be here for your questions, and if I don't know I will find out for you.


Your OH Friend,
Deborah Turrell
Obesity Help Support Group Leader/Coach