Now I'm scared...

Hi everyone, This comes with mixed emotions...I am pre-op and have my appt monday with my surgeon. I was just notified by a OH friend that her friend passed away today from her surgery. I know it is a risk...I didn't know her friend, but had been communicating with her through her post-op ordeal. It is very sad and scary...it makes me wonder if I am doing the right thing. I've waited so long for this oppertunity, but it only takes having something hitting this close to home to make you realize that the prospect of death is real. I desperatly need the surgery and am still game, but cringe at the thought of not being there for my 2 boys and husband. Am I being selfish taking the WLS route? I've tried everything else. Some words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated...and if anyone would care to, please keep Teri Lynn's family in your thoughts and prayers tonight. Thank-you, Laurie

Laurie, I know the chances of something catastrophic happening during wls is a very real possiblity but, for me, the odds of major disability or death from complications of obesity were greater. Because of the risks involved, I wrote letters to my hubby, sons and family & friends not to be opened unless something drastic happened. I wanted everyone to know that I went into my surgery well aware of the risks. Although I couldn't stand the thoughts of leaving my loved ones, I knew I needed the surgery to be able to enjoy my time with them. I'm only 3 months out, down 52 lbs and feeling better than I have in years. I can walk 1/2 mile without becoming breathless (before wls, I couldn't walk to the mailbox!) and my legs & ankles are no longer swollen at the end of the day (before all I could do was sit with them propped up and pray the swelling would go down during the night!) So, yes, the surgery is scary and risky, but so is trying to live with Morbid Obesity. Think about it, pray about it and do what is right for YOU! That is all that matters! Vickie J.

Hi Vicki, Thanks for the conversation...That is a super idea. I would be more content leaving final letters (especially for my children-one is only 4). At least if they don't understand at the time, they would understand when they are older. It makes me cry to write a "what could be" final letter...but I do believe it will put me at ease a bit. I really appreciated your advice...feel free to pass along any other great advice like that! Thanks again, Laurie

Laurie, I'm sure you've done your homework and considered all the very real possible complications. You've got to have a certain amount of faith in your surgeon and I hope you checked him out very well before as well. People do die, but it seems like it's usually those with severe pre-op health issues and I know of a patient who absolutely refused to walk who then developed a pulmonary embolism and also died. Have you talked your decision to have surgery over with your family? If they are also behind you and understand your reasons, then you should be fine. Good luck, Jan

What you're feeling is completely normal. When I went to my surgeon's consult - he spoke a death that happened to him (his patient) during the July 4th 04 weekend. We can do all the right things - and when our Maker decides to call us home there is nothing we can do but be ready to be on that side - we can slip on a banana or slip in the tube (people have died in weirder ways!)...and that is our time. Though I'm not saying to go into this with eyes closed I'm saying put your trust in God as I did... I had a complete trust in my GOD I was confident - super confident that I would be alright. I could have died - but at least I was happy in knowing what I was about to do was the right thing for me. And then I was on the other side and here I am 7 months later. Prepare with notes and stuff - but rest assure that everything will be alright and you'll pull through. I hadn't even check on my surgeon or had any concerned about him even though he did a lapband for a friend and didn't do it well. I still went on ahead with him despite this..but as I said - thank God everything turned out alright. Good luck to you!

Laurie, you are being perfectly normal. Everyone who considers this surgery goes through this stage. Its a prerequisite... Seriously, this is major surgery and you must be prepared for any outcome and you must prepare your family. You must be 200% sure you want this and make peace with that decision. I am a firm believer in all pre-ops reading the Memorial Page here on Obesityhelp.com, only because it does open your eyes and make you reallize what a big deal this is. You have a superb doctor. His mortality rates are very low. Just remember to do everything you are suppose to do and keep a positive outlook. We are all here for you and wish you the best! Patty

I have thought about that myself and decided I would rather go in my time trying to live than go not trying at all. It is all a personal decision to make. With God's will we will prevail.