Question/Conflicted

I have a question...I know I've read where some people have written letters to their loved ones prior to surgery, just in case. How many of you have done that? There's a part of me that thinks that I should, but there's a part that doesn't think it will be necessary. Help?! HUGS Kim

I am planning on doing it. Just in case. I am going to put them on my computer with instructions for my husband to print them out and give them out if God forbid anything happens to me. It is not going to be an easy task, but since there is a higher risk involved in this surgery than in your normal every day one, I feel it is something I need to do. Good luck to you Kat

Thanks Kat. I think part of me just doesn't want to tempt fate LOL

I did not, however I wrote a little will and put a little something in there. I did talk to everyone ahead of time and told them I loved them very much. I just really did not let the idea that anything bad would happen control me, I refused to give it power. Jenn

Hi Kim, I am not post operative but I have seen many lives lost or damaged and they've always regretted that they couldn't or didn't leave behind their message to their loved ones. Regardless, its entirely up to you, what you're comfortable with doing. After all, if you're living your life the way you believe is right and those that you love know you love them, then you've nothing to worry about, but if you've got a message to send before you go under, I'd do it, after all, how can you go wrong? Good luck on your surgery and I'm sure you'll come thru just fine and this letter you're speaking of, can become part of your journal/journey and a piece of reality for when you loose focus.

Hi Kim, In the last three months I've lost my best friends mom who was like a second mother to me, a dear aunt and a very sweet man to cancer. Life is so short, don't wait till you think you may die to tell them how you feel, tell them every chance you get. Hugs, Paulette

I didn't write any letters to family and they were the only ones who knew about my surgery. However, we are a very close family and we share our thoughts and emotions freely. I talked the older children the night before surgery because I didn't feel it necessary that they leave work just to anxiously wait in a waiting room. My youngest daughter and my DH were with me. Being a family of Christian faith we know that regardless of when our time comes to leave this life, we will be joined again eternally. That does not mean that we take life lightly -- it is a precious gift and we do not end a conversation with one another without saying "I Love you". I would encourage anyone that if it helps bring peace in their mind to write a letter to a loved one or friend is a great idea. Sometimes it is easier for people to put their feelings in a letter form or even a video than dialogue face to face. LuvitsunnyVB~lo/goal

I didn't write letters, I just told the people that mattered how I felt. I told my mom the day of my surgery if I don't make it make sure my kids are taken care of...she does that even though I am around. I told my husband all my wishes and that is how I left it. Tracey

Kim, Letters are a very personal issue. Some do, some don't. I sat down the day before my surgery and wrote letters to my hubby, each child and one to "family & friends". I'd discussed my wishes with my husband and kids and my family, but I wanted to be sure that everyone knew I went into this with my eyes wide open, fully understanding the risks. If something terrible happened, I didn't want anyone to think that I did not make an educated, informed decision or that I was uncertain about what I was doing. Thanks to my faith, I was prepared for the worst, but praying for the best - which is what I got!! You have to decide what is best for you & your family. Vickie J.

Kim, I've had a living will drawn at my regular doctor's office for 7 years - and when they asked me to bring it - I never even thought about what that was about - until now. My family knows I have organ donation on my driver's license - and have told them I want this done if anything should happen but in regards to thinking that I need to express anything before surgery - I didn't even think about it. To each his own..but my faith in God had me believing that I would be just fine. I told alot of people who told me that they would pray for me or would think positively - and adding my faith to the mix - I felt very comfortable with everything. I had OPEN RNY and I was back to work in 2 weeks. God was in control - and He will be control with you. God bless.