7 Days & A Wake-Up

Hi guys! Sorry I haven't been on in awhile but things have been hectic again. I'm on such an emotional rollercoaster that I've kind of been hiding too I have my Pre-Op on Thursday and surgery is on the 12th. I am VERY excited, scared, nervous, etc. as expected. Nothing that's come up yet has changed my mind. I've done everything I can in preparation too. My outstanding problem is with my home life...not getting along with anyone right now it seems. They say I'm so hung up on this surgery and the AMOS webpage that I don't have a clue what's going on around me...that I haven't been helping around the house and so on. And they're right, but I'm not so sure they need to be putting such a negative spin on it. I haven't been worrying about helping 5 other people clean the house b/c a. there are 5 other people capable of doing it and b. I want to spend more time with me son (both b/c I was accused of not spending enough time with him and b/c this surgery has me a little scared that this might be my last bit of time with him) My grandmother really laid into me about the RNY not being a MAJOR surgery and that I shouldn't spend so much time on this site b/c every experience is different and people are feeding me their own stories, which will be very different from my own. So even after explaining why I come to this site, she still didn't want to hear it...I'm just devastated right now, to be this close to my surgery and having all these breakdowns in my life. I never wanted things to start falling apart this way. But, on the positive side, I am still getting my surgery, I'm still coming to this site b/c I like what I read and I like the folks I've met Sorry to vent... Danielle

Danielle, you're going to be fine and your family relationships will also heal. Sometimes we all get on one another's nerves and it's totally natural to be thinking about this huge change in your life. If your family can't deal with you right now, stay out of their way. Lead your life the way you need to for yourself and your son and don't worry about the rest. They are grown ups and will get over it. Or not. See you in 8 days!!!! Jan

Danielle, I am sure that you will do great! I can understand your nervousness, I am sure I will be to when the day finally comes for me. But I can assure you that 10/12 is a great day! *whispering* It's my 30th bday. We will all be praying for you! Hugs Kim

Kim, may I just go on record to say that I've always found that the BEST people were born in October!!!! Jan

Jan I couldn't agree with you more Although this years is gonna be rough...something about turning 30

Danielle-Of course I don't know exactly what your family and you are going through, but keep one thing in mind. Sometimed loved ones act out like this when they are afraid of the unknown. This usually happens the closer you get to your surgery date. I went through this very same thing. It seemed all the people in my life that were "proud" of me or showed me some sort of support, "turned" against me the closer it got. Same complaints such as "you are spending more time on the computer than you are with me!". Believe it or not, they may need their hand held too! Whatever becomes of it all, you will do good. Stay positive and don't let anyone bring you down. The more positive you are as you go into surgery, the better you will do when you are out! I really believe that!

Hi, Kathy hit the nail on the head. Stay positive, take care of your needs. I too had family members give me grief, the fear of the unknown was their problem. I had a bit of that myself, fear. Time will heal the relationship with family members. Now just stay positive. I wish you the best of luck.

Danielle, there comes a time when you have to do, what you have to do for yourself. Not all of my family understood what I was going through either. So I took a stand of you are either with me or against me on this. Those that supported me, I talked to about the surgery, those that didn't, I would even talk to them about it. Contrary to what your grandmother said, this surgery is a major surgery, and you have to go in to this with your head on straight. This surgery is as much mental as it is physical, if you are surrounded by non supportive people you need to figure out how to deal with them now, because you are not going to have time to figure out how to deal with them later on. This has to be all about you. Good luck, steve

Stress causes people to jump on each other's cases and get on each other's nerves. I am speaking from experience since I want to kill my mother and boyfriend lately. But like everyone says, it will pass. Everything will be fine!

Thanks for all the support you guys. I really needed an encouraging word right now. Things just might be improving, the tension wasn't quite as thick at home last night, so maybe that is a sign of better days. I think I've isolated part of my personal issue with this. Steve mentioned that this surgery has to be all about me and I agree with him...and it was for awhile. People asked tons of questions, bought special food to accomodate my Pre-Op diet, just a bunch of little things. Then my mom comes home and says she's having surgery on the 8th (not WLS) and suddenly everyone forgot about me ...I KNOW this sounds petty, but I think it was a smack in the face for me. That's something I have to work out for myself. Down to 6 days and a wake up and I'm still ready to go. Thanks again guys, you're the best Danielle