Looking for Accountability/Motivation Partner

Hi from Jacksonville. I had my surgery through the naval hospital in Portsmouth, VA, as my husband is military and that's where we were at the time. We're back in Jacksonville, FL, as of last August/September, 2006, and things have been one stress after another. With many health issues (pernicious anemia, arthritis, etc), job issues (wanting me to be 3 people for the pay of one lowly paid employee), family issues (deployed husband and home alone with no family or friends in the area except my 3 yr old), and depression issues, it's been a very hard, uphill battle since we moved back to Florida. I was at 405 (or more as my scale didn't go any higher) before my surgery, 379, the day of my surgery, and at 236 when we moved back to Florida. Now, I'm at 249 and holding. Neither up or down, which is a great victory, I believe, but I want it to go DOWN at least to 200. I'm not looking for someone to berate me. I get enough of that from myself, thank you very much. I'm looking for a friend I can call and who can call me when things get tough and we can talk each other through those late night snacking urges, or the disastrous desires to eat ourselves sick when we're overly stressed. Someone who is willing to challenge me to lose a pound a week and hold me to it. Someone to be a friend and commiserate (did I spell that right?) with me (I try not to whine, but everyone needs a sounding board, right?) when the scale isn't moving or the day was just blah. If this sounds like you and you want someone who's been there, done that, please send me an email and let's start a "dialogue" as my boss says. If we can stand each other's personalities from there, the better for both of us. I promise, you'll like me. :p Tonya

Tonya, I can certainly understand what you are going through. I think it is great that you are reaching out and looking for a solution rather than giving in to those devilish urges and evil thoughts that like to rise up in our heads and bodies. I retired from the Navy in 2004 after 20 years, so I know all too well the stresses, challeges, and sacrifices that come along with being a military family. Our country owes you a debt of gratitude for the sacrifices you make so that hour husband can serve his country. You are welcome to send me a message through OH or email me at [email protected] anytime you would like. I am on the computer all day at work and would be happy to hear from you. In the mean time I would like to issue a challenge to get out and walk briskly for 30 minutes every day for the next 2 weeks. The exercise will both assist in your goal to drop 1 lb a week and it will also assist in stress relief which in turn will work in your favor toward dropping some weight. I am now 1 year post op and have lost 120 lbs to this point. I am knocking on the door to onederland (208) and want to get to and maintain between 190-195. I would love to have the support and encouragement in return. I hope your day is a great one and wish you nothing but success in all that you do today. Jerry

Jerry, Thanks for replying and for your service. It's always a battle of one kind of another with the military, isn't it? If it's not with another country, it's with the families. As for the challenge, I accept! It'll have to be during my lunch hour though as I live in a very rough neighborhood and walking outside beyond checking the mail and taking out the trash can be dangerous. I did use my elliptical tonight for an extra 10 minutes tonight on a higher setting though after I read your message as it made me see even that little bit could be enough to help me on that road to that 1 lb. I do feel better and think I'll sleep better tonight. Last night, even after posting this, I only slept a few hours. I only have time to reply to YOUR response tonight because my 3 yr old is my computer alarm and won't let sit at the computer for more than a few minutes at a time, which I won't fault her on. I'll try to email you from work tomorrow and maybe reply to the other responses as well. Thanks again, Tonya

Hi Tonya, Good for you for reaching out....wow...that is HUGE. Usually when "us" food addicts want to eat...we do. Sounds to me like you are committed to losing the weight. I am a 50 year young woman living in Mandarin (Jacksonville). I am planning Lap Band with in the next 6-8 weeks. I am scared and excited. Would love to chat. Jan Ward

Sorry, I haven't responded earlier. Haven't been sleeping well. Found out today I have carpal tunnel in both wrists and a pulled muscle in my right shoulder. Yay me. So typing is really slow. And I'm a glorified secretary, so that makes my job interesting to say the least. The doctor says, "Take a week off work to rest." I just laughed at her. Not bloody likely. I'd love to chat with you. I remember what it was like to be pre-op and scared too, so if you ever have any questions, concerns or just wanna say hi, I'm around. It may take a little while to respond, as you can see, but I do get back to you, I promise! Tonya

Hi Tonya it is Jan in J-ville. I am so sorry to hear about your carple tunnel, I have a friend who had the surgery and is recoverying too. My email is [email protected]... Tomorrow I meet the nutrtitionist and Wed. get my pre-tests.... take care and email me when your hands feel better Jan

Jan, This is Mark Schueneman from Wachovia. So good to see you here....I am having Lap RNY on 5/23 and my wife Lisa had LapBand on 4/27. Let us know if you have any questions or would like information on our surgeon! (I hope this is the Jan Ward that I knew from the bank). Mark & Lisa (Willoughby) Schueneman Tonya - We live in Orange Park and can certainly be an ear to listen and a buddy to inspire. I was not in the military...but I was a military brat. Mark

Mark...Oh My Gosh....I cannot believe you found me...AND when did you and Lisa get married!!!!! Speaking of Lisa, how is she doing since Lap band? I am having mine in 4-6 weeks...this is scary stuff...but I gotta do it cuz I ain't living at this weight...I am so fat I can hardly move! Who is your surgeon? Mine is Dr. Cyres on Beach Blvd. You still at Wachovia? jw

Jan, Lisa is doing extremely well. She had her surgery on 4/27 and has lost 13 pounds the first week. She is definately stoked and has the right frame of mind for success. Our doctor is Muhammad Jawad in Ocala. We chose him because he is a doctor in the center of excellence for bariatric surgery. The hospital we used was in Ocala, as well. He had made the hospital a center of excellence, as well. What that means is that they have an the proper facilities to treat larger clients (wheelchairs, beds, etc). I am only 2.5 weeks from surgery and I am anxious and excited. We would love to talk to you and help each other to ensure we have success with this tool. Lisa and I got married in 2001 (when we were both displaced by the bank and nepotism was no longer an issue) LOL We understand about wanting to have the surgery because we too are so tired of the limitations the weight has put on our lives. Heck, when we are done all of us "skinnies" need to plan to do something we never would do today Please email us and we will trade phone numbers, etc. We live in Orange Park (Oakleaf Plantation). Our emails: [email protected] [email protected] And yes, I am still at the bank. 20 years......if you can believe that! Mark

Hi, Tonya. I think that I could use the same. I'm newly 40, single, no kids and I was really happy with my weight loss and then I came home and ate some cookies to celebrate. Nuts! I had my surgery on Dec 27 2006, so I think you are further along in your journey. I didn't go through all "this" to stop losing and regain my weight, but it's not easy to keep it up and I think a buddy would be good. So many years of dealing with things with food instead of actually processing life has to be replaced with many years of doing things better. I can be very encouraging, I think and likeable too. I would be happy to be your accountability buddy. I only work part-time and I have unlimited local and long distance on my phone. Truth be told, if you choose me to be your bud, I will listen to whining for a while and then I'll want you to do something about it and I'll offer suggestions and encouragement. But I don't like to hear the same problems over and over without witnessing a willingness to try solutions. I like to think that I am willing to do what it takes to become healthier and to get the weight off and keep it off, but sometimes... I'm willing to try this out if you are. I have depression problems too. I am bi-polar. Let me know. Elizabeth