Jealous of my best friend

I'm 31 days away from my revision from RNY to DS, I had RNY back in 2009, it wasn't successful...I didn't lose all, anme have gained back a lot...

My best friend of 26 years had RNY at the end of september. She is doing awesome, shes lost like 40+ lbs already, and you can drastically see it. I'm jealous! I wasnt like that in the begining of my RNY.I know everyone is different, somes lose fastet then others.. But why me? Why did my complications happen? It doesn't feel fair.

I want to be happy for her I do, its awesome shes getting healthy. But I can't shake this feeling of jealousy and unfairness I feel like a horrible person.I've actually avoided this past month.I just don't think I can handle seeing her. I know my revision is close and I need her. But I just don't think I can handle it.

Is this normal? I keep telling myself to get over it shes your best friend the one who has been with you through thick and thin, no pun...

I feel horrible, we should be closer now then ever, yet it feels we are farther apart now.

Any advice please?

You are just down and tired of waiting....normal and understandable.  Let her know you're hurting for yourself but happy for her; it's just hard for you right now. Hang in there.

 

--gina

 

You are not jealous of her you are envious and that is entirely different.  You wouldn't want her to fail, you just also would have liked to succeed.  You are not a horrible person, you are having a normal reaction.  I am sure your friend will understand that.   I am sending you a virtual hug.  Keep your head held high for having the courage to persist in your weight loss journey and finding an alternate solution to the problem.  Try to remember that it will be your turn again soon.

 

Best of luck

 

Renee

 

Normal reaction to the situation.  Your time is coming.  Hang in there and don't say something to mess up a friendship based on a temporary situation.  Discretion is the better part of valor. 

ITA... You are such a wise woman!

 

I wanted to tell you I had the RNY to DS conversion in March of this year. The RNY never worked for me either. I did lose weight at first but after that I was also hungry and always could eat a lot and never feel the restriction even though the pouch was the right size. I was back up to 375 lbs for the DS.

I would not beat yourself up for feeling jealous. I think it is more being upset about the RNY, waiting for the DS, etc... Be honest with your friend and I am sure she will understand.

Best of luck! Terri

PS. Who is your surgeon?

Thank you everyone for your advice, sorry for the delay in response, hurricane Sandy came our way and I had to reserve battery power due to no electric.

I did finally talk to my friend, well text. I didn't mention how I was feeling, figured this will pass once I've had my surgery. I do think it has a lot to do with the waiting. 25 more days to go...I'm impatiently waiting lol.

Thanks again, its awesome having people with similar situations to talk to.