Stomach is going to jump

Hey Beth!  I've been following you very closely since a lot of your posts are mirroring my thoughts.  I check into the hospital at 6am Tuesday morning.  The bus will be driving away from you and coming for me!  LOL  I am scared for my kids and husband.  Deep down tho, I know I will be fine.  I'm too stubborn to die.  I have a strong case of the what ifs tho.  My older girls are 11, 9, and 8.  The 9 year old is mine from a previous relationship and she is very worried.  Everytime she remembers that surgery is coming up, she hugs me and cries.  I'm not sure what I can do to let her know it will be ok.  I usually escape her hugs very quickly and head somewhere to cry without her seeing me. 

Thanks so much for your response.  We can go thru this together!  ;-)  I hope your surgery goes well, and I will join you on the bench soon after you get there.  At least we can sit together, right?

I'm on facebook a lot, if you are and would like to keep in touch there, shoot me a PM.

GOOD LUCK!!!  I hope all the best for you! 

Hi Switched! (Can I call you that?)

I'd love for us to be switch sisters! My surgery is supposed to be 10 am (EST) Monday morning. I will post something that afternoon or evening (or my hubby will for me) on this forum to let everyone know how things went. I won't be able to post after that because I don't want to keep the laptop at the hospital, because when I go out to walk anyone could scrounge around in my room.

I'm with you on the stubbornness. My family can't get rid of me that easily!  I wish your children weren't so sad. It breaks my heart to think of them crying. And I know exactly what you are going thru ...when they start to cry, you cry.

In one of my earlier posts I mentioned that my youngest son nearly died, twice actually. The first time was when he was born, he was premature and his lungs were not developed. We got him out of the PICU after a week but for the next 4 years he was in and out of the hospital due to lung problems. Then when he was 5 he nearly drowned...he was not breathing when I pulled him out and he was blue (it was winter). I did CPR and called the ambulance. I got a miracle when he came out of his coma the next day, and was home in a week with no brain damage. One month after he got home, my father died. After the funeral, I tried to go back to college. When I tried to drop my son off at day care, he started crying. I started crying and couldn't let him go. I didn't return to school for a while...I couldn't leave him..I was scared something else would happen.

Finally life returned to normal. And my son is an A-B student (every year) and was accepted to all 3 local honors high schools. He's now in 10th grade and you'd never know he had ever had issues.

I want to be there for him when he gets married (many years from now) and when my oldest son gets married. I want to see their kids, I want to travel with my husband (heck, I want to keep up with my husband who's 9 years younger than me!).

And I know you want those things too! And we will get them, ok?! 

Beth, yay!  A sister!  You can call me whatever you want, Mindy is my name tho.

I'm so glad your son made it thru all that (with momma in tow) and is happy and healthy today.  How awesome is that?!

I've been debating about the computer in the hospital thing.  I kinda want it to be there in case I end up in awhile and want to talk to you all....but I wonder if they have lock boxes of some sort or something?  I know my wedding ring will be staying safely at home in the jewelry box.

Lets GET EM!  Good luck!

 I am not as close to my surgery as you are yet, so I don't really have anything to add regarding the surgery. I still have not had any nerves kick in.

But, one thing I do know about is anti-depressants. They take 2 weeks or more to get into your system in order to create an effect, and they are not designed to handle anxiety. So there is no help there (not to even discuss the problems with taking other people's expired prescriptions)

The trouble with anti-anxiety pills is that they make you feel better for a while, but you tend to feel worse when they wear off. Then you want another pill, and you get the picture. It leads to ever-increasing use of anti-anxiety pills. That is why they are a controlled substance... they tend to lead to dependence. They are also an a central nervous system depressant, which means that they add together with other CNS depressant drugs, like alcohol, and can slow down or stop your breathing if taken in high enough doses. (or too close together. More is not better!)

However, if you are determined to take an anti-anxiety pill, your doctor might prescribe something like Atavan. If you call your surgeon, it is possible that he might call in something for you. 

I didn't have any intention of taking those scripts...I was just saying what I have along those lines lol!  I'm not sure how I'd get a hold of my surgeon over the weekend.  He is not there and that resident  on call called me back.  I'll just have to suck it up.  I just know I'll be completely exhausted some surgery day because I'm not sleeping much or well at all.  I was actually shaking last night.  I've never had anxiety problems before, but I have a friend who has described his anxiety attacks and it sounded just like me last night.  ARGH!  Good thing they'll help me get a good days sleep during surgery

It's great you found a switch sister! I have one too and it helps to compare our recoveries as we are just three days apart.

I think with your current health being as good as it is and your prior births without pain meds (and you're really worried about this? Really?)  I would have to disagree a bit with Heidi and say you probably won't have a lot of pain. I didn't. I was off the morphine drip by the second day. I don't think you will take a month to stand upright either. It took me half a day.  Also, I was eating solids a week after surgery. Now at two weeks out I feel like I could probably eat anything I wanted (I mean within reason of course) but I really don't desire anything. The most difficult thing I have encountered so far is trying to figure out what my new normal is. Food tastes the same but I don't feel the same about most of them. Also, the boredom. How many more cooking shows can I possibly watch? Oh poor me...

I am so very grateful I am having such a smooth recovery and I constantly remember what my surgeon told me when I said I was delighted by my better than expected recovery. He said I was having a typical and normal recovery and there really wasn't anything special about it. That kinda put it in perspective for me.  I bet yours will be the same.

OMG you had three babies without pain meds. I've never given birth and that was by choice. You want to talk about being afraid of something? I can't imagine anything more painful than that and you did it three times. I have had dreams of giving birth and every single time I wake up terribly upset and shaken. The very thought scares me. I mean, ewww, do you know where they come out of??? Jeeeezzz....I will never understand why women still do that.

  OMG you made me giggle!  Thanks for that!  hahahahahaa!

The thing about babies is...it is terrible terrible pain for awhile, then it is DONE.  No pain at all.  You can't even imagine being in pain when it's over andyou're holding the most precious thing ever.  I'm not one to take medications.  I knew I didn't want an epidural or anything else for that matter.  I didn't want any type of substance going to my baby if I could at all help it.  For me, the worst fear and the one I had nightmares about was a c-section.  I, luckily, avoided that and will never have to get one now since we are done having kids.

I am so happy for you that your recovery is going so well!!  The only thing that I have to compare to is my sleeve surgery.  I didn't use the morphine pump at all and the damn nurses kept coming in and hitting the button.  It made me SUPER pukey and they wouldn't quit.  Hopefully I have no pain again...haha probably will tho since this is the first (hopefully only) open surgery I'll ever have.  I didn't even so much as take Tylenol once I left the hospital.  I have this silly nightmare of coughing and this gigantic incision opening up and my guts spilling out.  LOL...wonderful how our mind works, huh?

"I mean, ewww, do you know where they come out of??? Jeeeezzz....I will never understand why women still do that."

Lol @Sandy! My hubby figured that out and had a doctor fix him of that little problem! He didn't want kids....mine are enough of a handfull for us! I had to agree, I want an "empty nest" soon. He's promised me a trip to Hawaii and Japan, and I want it!

Call me today. We'll talk.

--gina

Hello Gina!  I'd love to call and I have your number stored in my phone, but I'd probably cry the whole time.  I'm a total FREAK right now!  Haha...would probably scare my angel away!   I just got off the phone with my husband (I get to talk to him 2 times a day usually for about 5-10 minutes each time) and he just keeps telling me everything will be ok.  I know it will.  I just need to keep convincing myself of that.  Someone needs to just smack me back to reality, I think.

Anyways, I'll give you a call later today if I'm feeling stable haha!!    Thanks for being there, it means a ton!

~Mindy