Stomach is going to jump

I posted a few days ago how nervous I am.  I down to 3 full days before surgery and I am in a CONSTANT state of anxious.  Ya know that stage fright feeling where your stomach is constantly churning and you feel like you're going to vomit??  Yeah, that.  I can't sleep, can't stop crying (why, I have no idea), and feel like am seconds away from chickening out.  Someone say something that will calm me pleeeeeease.  ***** slap me, if need be.  My goodness.  Each day gets worse it seems.  I just want it to be OVER!  Anything I can do or take to calm me down?  I feel like I need to go to the crazy house.

 Hello - I can't speak from DS surgery experience but from my lapband surgery (which I am working to revise). I had quite an easy time before and after (was just a little anxious day of surgery) and looking back I think it was because I kept busy with fun things. I know in your previous post you mentioned writing letters, etc. My personal recommendation is do them asap instead of the day before and try to fill the last days before surgery with fun, laughter, family friends etc. I went to the movies, off-roading, restaurants, etc. in the days before my surgery.
In addition, I made plans for after surgery. I made plans to go to Vegas at 4 weeks post-op and I had the time of my life there. I know everyone's recovery is different and this is major surgery so you may not want to plan something so huge but I would encourage you to visualize, plan, think  & about all the things you will do after surgery and after you begin to lose weight. Daydream about it , get excited =). 
WIshing you a smooth surgery and quick recovery!

Thanks, I'd LOVE to keep myself busy, but the hubby is working out of town and won't be bac****il after I'm gone for surgery.  That leaves me here alone with 4 kids, the littlest two are 9 months and 2.  Not much I can do with them alone haha!  I need 4 more arms.  I figured I'd write the letters the day before since that will be the only time I have alone between now and then.  I'm sure I'll do a lot of crying while writing them.

Is there a med that someone can get that calms crazy nerves?  I've never experienced this before.

Ewww, I never could write those letters, no matter how hard I tried.  What I DID do to maintain sanity was clean the house from top to bottom, and prepare reheatable food for my family.

Oh boy do I know how you feel.  You need to stay focused on why you are doing this and how you will never be fat again. You need to remember that what you are about to do will allow you to live longer and healthier, and that means no emergency trips to the ER in 5 or 10 years or whenever because you're having a major heart attack. Do you think open heart surgery will be preferable to a DS? Compare the odds of a smooth recovery with the DS compared to your chances of surviving a major coronary episode. Which makes you more anxious?

My first thoughts when I came to after surgery was that I did it. I knew I would never worry again about heart issues, diabetes, getting fatter and even more uncomfortable (and I'm a lightweight!) and how easy this was compared to what a major heart attack would be like. I can't begin to tell you the relief I felt immediately post op, all drugged up and dopey. I still understood what a gift I gave myself and I was damned proud I actually went through with it.  And let me tell you, I was every bit as terrified as you are and considering how hard I fought to get this surgery for almost three years, I was totally dismayed by my unexpected chickenitis. I did not think it would happen to me, considering everything I did to get the surgery. It turned it into a sad and scary event for me and now that I am 2+ weeks post op, I realize I completely over-reacted. It should have been a happy time for me but while my close friends were very excited for me, I was miserable with fear.

I suppose it is plain human to feel scared when one makes such a transofrmational change in one's life. I think if I'm being honest with myself, the fear was only partly from the upcoming surgery; the other part was not knowing what to expect once the changes started to occur. Even though being fat is awful, uncomfortable and embarrasing, it is what we know. To take that away so permanently as to know you can never be that fat again with this surgery without trying very hard is a life transforming event.  You as you know you will be no more. Now that is daunting. It is also exhilarating. But you are just going to have to take my word on that for now.
 
If nothing else, consider all those who have gone before you and survived and thrived. Compare that to your life now and compare that to those poor souls who opt to get a crap band, or worse, RNY. Ewwww! You are getting the BEST surgery, period. It will improve your life, period. The chances of you suffering side effects are considerably less than other WL surgeries. Heck, your chances of suffering side effects are about 1% for something serious and as high as 10% if you are in bad shape. What are your chances of remaining healthy for the next 10 years? Consider the stats. Look at the numbers. They are so stacked in your favor. You should have these odds playing the lottery!!!  Go read every page on dsfacts.com until you feel your nerves are back under control. That's what I did and it really helped. I also kept very active on this board because the best examples for me as to what I could expect were all right here. If they could do it, well certainly I could too. And so can you. Just wait until you are out of surgery and feeling a huge surge of relief that all that sadness in your life because of your weight will soon be a memory. And you will KNOW this time the weight won't come back because it plain can't anymore.  Then you'll be on these boards telling the next pre-op with a bad case of the jitters that it is oh so worth it and not so bad after all. There is a reason those that have gone before us all say they'd do it all over again in a NY minute if necessary.

And if all that fails to calm you, consider this: how upset would you be a year from now knowing you could have been slim and in much better health had you not let your fear take over?  Would that cause you some serious painful regrets? Do you want to live with that? Regret is an awful thing to live with. Is it worth it to you to face down your fears so that you can reclaim your life? Remember all that pain you've felt for years and years because of your weight? It ain't going away. You give up on you now and you condemn yourself to more of that. It ain't worth it. You, however, are worth it. Remember that.

Sandy,

Thank you so much for your well thought out and heartfelt response.  Thanks for making me CRY again!! lol  I know that I need to do this.  I WANT to do this.  Right now I have no comorbities.  I am healthy, except for the weight.  I am honestly more afraid of the IV and then incisions than of the surgery and recovery.  I have a high pain tolerance.  What I don't understand is how I can have babies with no pain meds, have 3 prior surgeries (1 weight loss related, VSG), and go thru some pretty horrific things and yet be SO anxious right now.  I don't know why.

I just got a call back from the resident on call at the hospital.  He said that there is nothing that I can take right now since I'm so close.  He recommended Benadryl to help me relax and sleep.  I have Ambien here, but am concerned to take it because if the babies wake up in the night I may not wake up to hear them and I'm the only one here with them.

I rooted thru the cupboards and found a sample pack of Prozac that has a date on it of 4/2003 LOL...guess that's a no-go.  I also found a friends Lexapro (no idea why it's at my house) that hs a date of 7-17-08.  I've never been on an antidepressant.  Is that what they do is help with feelings like these?  Not sure.  I just want to not feel like I'm going to throw up 24 hours a day.  Can't even think straight, mind is racing.

Wonder if they'll just take me in right now and put me to sleep until Buchwald is ready.  haha

I slept like **** cried, and was very stressed. That time will be passed before you know it and you'll be 9 weeks post op like me and happy as a clam. It will be long and hard, but it will end. Sorry I don't have any suggestions. I just have sympathy or rather empathy to give. You'll get through it and it's normal.

Thanks Heidi.  I can't wait to be where you are!  I envy you   How are you feeling?  Feel normal again yet?

I feel better than I have in years.  I've got loads of energy.  I feel really good.  I don't think the "normal" feeling like you were before surgery will come back for a while.  You get used to what your new normal is.  Some days I have a small tummy day, struggle with fluid/protein/vitamins, or feel like I am eating what I need and I'm doing really well. 

I was jealous of people too when they were starting to eat normal food again and being active.  It took me a good 4 weeks to be upright, no pain what so ever, and feel pretty damn good.  I'm a slow healer though and had some hormone issues most women don't deal with.  The first month is the hardest, you'll make it through though and just keep telling yourself, this too shall pass.  You'll make it.  You're in the hardest phase right now, it's only going to get better.

Just expect strong pain, expect long recovery, expect nausea, expect weird stuff, but also know what are the warning signs of real problems.  If you go into it being fully aware and ready for what is about to hit you, I don't believe you'll have one ounce of buyers remorse.

Remember, when you feel like you've just been hit by a truck when you wake up from having your surgery, that's just the DS welcome wagon! :)  I don't know who to give that line credit to, but it's spot on.

You'll do awesome girl.

Hi SwitchedUp,

I'm having my DS on Monday...is that when yours is? I have to say, I haven't been nervous before today, but it is beginning now. My two sons are nearly grown (20 & 15), so I don't have the same stresses that you do. However, please don't take meds that you weren't already on and that your surgeon doesn't know about. Neither you nor he wants any surprises the day of surgery!

With children as young as yours, I'm sure it's really hard to keep yourself from picturing bad scenarios. I have been reading alot to keep myself distracted, but now I am starting to pack and prepare lists, so I can't escape thinking about it any longer.

I am worried about my sons and my husband....and my mother and sisters. I reassure them as much as I can....in fact I have to reassure them so much, that it reassures me too!

I'm not giving up this chance to get rid of my diabetes. I don't want to be legless or blind....I don't want a heart attack at the same age as my aunt and father (both in their 50's and both with diabetes)...I'm 43, and getting ever closer to my 50's.

I think of bad things happening too, but I also know if it's my time...I'll go whether I have surgery or not. I know from reading this forum that sooo many people have this surgery and come thru just fine.

The odds are in our favor, SwitchedUp! Look at all the vets here, and all the great advice and help they give us!