Ch ch ch changes.........
I'm a posting daemon tonight.
Sooo life has been on a weird trajectory. Ms over achiever me failed an Advanced Life Support Course in September after melting down sobbing like an idiot during my practical examination. The knock on effect was terrible as I then had to explain to my manager how I managed to fail my practical exam and yet pass the written????? For Clinical Governance this had to go through an investigative process to make sure I wasn't going to pose a risk to patients as a provider of advanced life support as part of my post. Fortunately two years of solid Masters level study showed that this was an aberrant result compared with my personnel records and I was asked to re-sit the Practical. My exam is on the 12/12/11. I have sat three mock exams now and sailed through them all. I just don't understand why I unraveled the way I did....well maybe I do.....the fact is I did. It shook me to the core. I have burnt out.
I have been hating my job for the best part of two years and faced so many levels of bullying and harassment that I could alphabatise them and stick on the dewy decimal system in order to find them again for reference. I have stuck with it for 6 years trying to find meaning in my life outside of this hellish place and been slowly losing my compass. My massive weight loss hasn't helped my hormones nor my constant study and inhuman levels of occupational stress. In short I've been a zombie and I've been struggling.
On Thursday I had a meeting with my boss and HR. I asked for a year long sabbatical explaining how hard life has been and how I need to leave the confines of the Hospital for more diverse experiences. My boss was reluctant but agreed on the proviso that she could keep my job open for me. I was granted leave and offered a reference and "inside word" should I want a job on a cruise ship for a spell as my boss has contacts in this area. I have enrolled in an off shore medic course in January and have already been picked up by a recruitment agency wanting to send me into the North Sea as soon as I finish to work in the Oil Industry. I'm hoping to get a South America posting on a Research vessel all going to plan. I can not wait!
I can see light on the horizon. So much transition has happened over the last two years. I cannot begin to explain how deep the trasformative forces are in my life.....all I know is that the Ds has given me the health to meet it head on. I am both afraid and empowered and cannot wait to have the time, resources and ability to meet my American friends in person and to see life's rich tapestry again.
To all of the light barers here thank you..... many of you have been kind and patient shoulders to lean on while I've been going through this. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
xxxxx
Sooo life has been on a weird trajectory. Ms over achiever me failed an Advanced Life Support Course in September after melting down sobbing like an idiot during my practical examination. The knock on effect was terrible as I then had to explain to my manager how I managed to fail my practical exam and yet pass the written????? For Clinical Governance this had to go through an investigative process to make sure I wasn't going to pose a risk to patients as a provider of advanced life support as part of my post. Fortunately two years of solid Masters level study showed that this was an aberrant result compared with my personnel records and I was asked to re-sit the Practical. My exam is on the 12/12/11. I have sat three mock exams now and sailed through them all. I just don't understand why I unraveled the way I did....well maybe I do.....the fact is I did. It shook me to the core. I have burnt out.
I have been hating my job for the best part of two years and faced so many levels of bullying and harassment that I could alphabatise them and stick on the dewy decimal system in order to find them again for reference. I have stuck with it for 6 years trying to find meaning in my life outside of this hellish place and been slowly losing my compass. My massive weight loss hasn't helped my hormones nor my constant study and inhuman levels of occupational stress. In short I've been a zombie and I've been struggling.
On Thursday I had a meeting with my boss and HR. I asked for a year long sabbatical explaining how hard life has been and how I need to leave the confines of the Hospital for more diverse experiences. My boss was reluctant but agreed on the proviso that she could keep my job open for me. I was granted leave and offered a reference and "inside word" should I want a job on a cruise ship for a spell as my boss has contacts in this area. I have enrolled in an off shore medic course in January and have already been picked up by a recruitment agency wanting to send me into the North Sea as soon as I finish to work in the Oil Industry. I'm hoping to get a South America posting on a Research vessel all going to plan. I can not wait!
I can see light on the horizon. So much transition has happened over the last two years. I cannot begin to explain how deep the trasformative forces are in my life.....all I know is that the Ds has given me the health to meet it head on. I am both afraid and empowered and cannot wait to have the time, resources and ability to meet my American friends in person and to see life's rich tapestry again.
To all of the light barers here thank you..... many of you have been kind and patient shoulders to lean on while I've been going through this. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.
xxxxx
RIP Mickie aka Happychick. You will be missed deeply.
I'll be working a one month on and off rota so for the month I'm at sea David will be here. He works nights so both Penfold and Linus go into their crate in the puppy pen in the lounge room and sleep over night when we're at work. They then go to bed with him in the morning and wake him at about 1.30pm for walks about the Estate. David usually goes back to bed in the afternoon for an hour and the dogs have a nap then too. He has a pretty good routine down pat.
We used to get the neighbors kids to let them out at 10pm and 7am but David changed his hours so we don't need that now. The down side is that poor David now works 5 nights a week.
We used to get the neighbors kids to let them out at 10pm and 7am but David changed his hours so we don't need that now. The down side is that poor David now works 5 nights a week.
RIP Mickie aka Happychick. You will be missed deeply.
Good for you for making such bold changes in your life. I swear this surgery doesn't just change you physically; you change down to the soul level. Even when I was just waking up after surgery, I knew I was changed so profoundly that it wasn't just the soon to come weight loss that was going to be different. I don't know how to explain it to the pre-ops or to people who don't go through a surgery like this but I can tell by your recent life altering changes that you know exactly what I mean.
And I agree with Patty; go to Tahiti! New Zealand sounds great too and you already speak the language...
And I agree with Patty; go to Tahiti! New Zealand sounds great too and you already speak the language...
All the vets have moved to a site where there is no censorship and no biased, unfair moderation. If you want ACCURATE information, join us here:
http://weightlosssurgery.proboards.com/index.cgi
http://weightlosssurgery.proboards.com/index.cgi
Sandy- I'm very intrigued by this post. Since discovering the DS, I've felt that truly there would be an invisible threshold that I would cross over post-DS, but as a pre-op I could never understand until I was on the other side. I'm glad they call it the Dark Side, because it truly is an exclusive club that I can't fully realize at this point.
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