Neurotic neurotic put your hands all over my booodeeee

kirmy
on 10/23/11 10:15 pm - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
I'm a fan of neurosis. I feel I've perfected my special brand of insecurity to a knife edged point of pointlessness. I could teach Woddy a thing or two about hand wringing obsessiveness. So imagine my surprise and indeeed vauge unease to discover some folk look to me as a vet when it comes to the DS ( I'm only 22 months out). I feel that this warrents a genteel disclaimer on my behalf and here it is....

I'm rubbish! I ate three quarters of a family block of nut chocolate last night and half a packet of salt and vinegar crisps and two salami sticks (bread kids bread)and poked at my African Famine disteded belly like a beached jelly fish farting in the general direction of the dogs. This morning when David arrived home from his night shift he awoke me to tell me he could taste what I ate last night when he was walking down the hallway....even before entering the bedroom. I chortled like Homer Simpson at my large intestines special ability.

I have lost all of my excess weight and my labs are utterly fantastic. I have nothing to complain about. I have made no effort at all to lose any of my weight but conversely by eating utter **** I've effectively shat myself thin. I am the DS Karen Carpenter but instead of aperients I use nestle family blocks. I'm a dickhead.

Today I tried to put on my Zara trousers and had to squidge my belly in to do the clasp up. I felt indignant that the **** I'm shovelling into my head might actually equate to the widening of my skinny saggy girth. I had about 5 seconds of panic thinking ..."well I'm now going to gain so much weight that I'll need to wash with a rag on a stick". Then I decided that I'm about half a stone under weight in my opinion and I should give myself an upper cut for entertaining eating disorder behaviours. Ironic really when I'm about as compliant as a fox inb a hen house.

So here is my bad behaviour as a cautionary tale. I DO eat 200grams of protein a day, I do get loads of fat from cream, cheese and butter each day deliberatly, I do limit white flour carbs to twice weekly **** sessions which can and do cause an ozone hole to appear over rural Scotland. I also do eat large volumes of chocolate and sugar each day. I try to swap sugar in my tea and coffe to sweetners and I largely drink decaf but I am a sugar fiend.

There are loads of folk here who know what they are on about and have maintained a lifestyle of unblemished success. I'm more a juggernaught of catastrophie with ocasional moments of blinding insight and apathy. I do however look ******g fantastic in jersey and woolmix! For now my shallowness delights me enough to continue my wankerish behaviours.

Disclaimer over....continue.

p.s.can't get my ******g spell check to work....enjoy my dyslexic phonetics ....
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
beemerbeeper
on 10/23/11 10:47 pm - AL
I always enjoy your phoenetics, dyslexic or not. 


~Becky


kirmy
on 10/24/11 12:18 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
Mercie buckets.
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
Ms. Cal Culator
on 10/23/11 11:20 pm - Tuvalu


So...this is a Public Serivice Announcement to warn us that if we are in fact a skosh mad pre-op, we MAY get skinny--or we may just be not as fat--but we are quite likely to remain mad?






kirmy
on 10/24/11 12:19 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
Mad as a box of frogs....and not the greatest person to look up to as a good example.....ever....
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
AllieInOntario
on 10/23/11 11:27 pm
You do my heart good. :)   I have decided that chips (crisps) are medicine.  Nuff said. :)
Pick your surgery first, then your surgeon. Not the other way around.  
PS:... Potato chips should be a food group.

I'm tired of screwing with that damn health widget.
 I've lost 125 pounds to date!!!!
   And I'm UNDER 190 now!!! 
 
             
kirmy
on 10/24/11 12:20 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
Nooooooo they are not and I am not advocating eating ****e either....sigh.......see see what happens when I open my mouth?
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
AllieInOntario
on 10/24/11 9:40 am, edited 10/24/11 9:41 am
YES... THEY ARE!    
  
Pick your surgery first, then your surgeon. Not the other way around.  
PS:... Potato chips should be a food group.

I'm tired of screwing with that damn health widget.
 I've lost 125 pounds to date!!!!
   And I'm UNDER 190 now!!! 
 
             
Jody W.
on 10/24/11 12:47 am - Windsor, CT
Good to see you back!!  Thank you so much for being honest with us newbies... and pre-ops

Original LapBand Surgery - 07/26/06- DS Surgery - 08/16/2011
 HW/LW/SW/CW/GW
289/195/277.5/242.5/170
 

kirmy
on 10/24/11 5:29 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
You're very welcome.
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
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