Approved for Surgery - Wracked with Doubt

Facts are good things.  I like facts.  Thanks for reminding me that this is no time to abandon reason.  The facts of the matter are as you've stated them.  Thanks, Diana.

For me I looked at the DS strictly as a means to an end, nothing more.

In your case it looks like the two deciding factors are

1) Do you believe with absolute confidence that you can successfully diet your way down to around 200lbs and keep it there for the rest of your life?

and

2) Should you opt for surgery, does the compliance part (vites, blood tests, protein) sound unreasonable for you do do every day?

If the answer to both is no, then I would focus on getting the jitters under control and commit to surgery. What is it specifically about the surgery that is causing the distress? It helps to talk about it, especially where where others can relate.

Lots of people who have opted for WLS have been able to loose weight before surgery many times in the past (some, but not all), but the problem is keeping the weight off. For nearly everyone the weight has come back- time and time again- with friends. You are not alone there, there's ample medical studies showing that the problem has nothing to do with lack of willpower! There is no shame in getting WLS to prevent the weight from making a return, in fact it is the wisest decision because that course of action is the only one with statisically promising results for the long-haul.

While the DS has the best stats for long term for EWL and lowest regain, it is not without a price. You must take vites  and eat 100grams of protein each day, and take regular blood tests to make sure your vitamin dose is sufficient. You will also have to watch your intake of simple carbs (no matter what surgery you've had you can never expect to be able to eat unlimited amounts white carbs and simple carbs without weight gain consequences). Not many people view this as a downside, a lot of DSers love the protein and fat rich diet, and taking vites a couple times a day isn't the worst thing in the world.

If the comliance with the DS sounds like a better fate than battling your weight the old fashioned way, I think you know what to do!

Good luck with your decision.

Busy Bee: I think I'm mostly over the post-surgery reservations that I've had.  Maybe it's the idea that I should be able to get through this on my own.  I know, not a good way to think about this, but it probably is playing a role.  But you all are right about this, of course: this surgery is the best (and, realistically, the only) way forward.  So, time to move on and accept things for what they are.  I really appreciate your help with this.

I was one of those people who told myself that I would never have weight loss surgery.  Never.  At the age of 45, it finally dawned on me that one more diet, more more program, one more pill was never going to be enough.  I lost weight, a lot of times.  I gained it back, all of the time. 

I do think that you need to be sure though, that this is what you want.  What you need.  If you aren't mentally and emotionally ready, maybe you can put it off until you are at that point.  I get being scared.  I get altering your body so drastically.  We all get wishing that we didn't HAVE to make this decision.  

Hang in there and good luck to you.  Oh and congats on your great loss so far!  That is really great.  If/when you have your surgery, you, your liver and your doctor will thank you :)

Thanks, Maria.  I think you hit it on the head.  This isn't much of a choice any more.  I really do "HAVE" to make this change.  Once I strip my concerns of the emotional clutter, it really isn't much of a decision.  I'm not living another year like this when the option of not living like this is available.  As I think Diana wrote earlier, it would really be stupid to delay and then find that my insurance co. dropped coverage for DS (Diana didn't say it would be stupid to let it happen, just that it could happen - but it would be stupid).  It's not my first choice, but my first choice isn't a legitimate option anymore.

I think others have said the same thing but you can lose the weight -- you've proved it over and over. But the key is KEEPING IT OFF. That's the whole reason IMHO for the DS. It allows us to keep the weight off and not have to count every calorie, carb and fat gram, for the rest of our natural life.

If you decided that you could lose the weight "this time", what would you change to keep the weight off? That is the $64,000 question that we've all asked (and answered). Are you willing to spend the rest of your life counting everything?

I was in my middle 40's when I decided on the DS. I was one of those who was adament that I didn't need/want WLS and I could do it myself -- hah. DS is the best thing I've ever done and would do it again in a heartbeat.

Only you can make the deciision and whatever decision you make will be the right one for you. Once I made up my mind, I never questioned my decison to have the DS. I was really comfortable with my surgeon.

The quote from Einstein is perfect -- insanity is "doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results."  So what would be different this time losing the weight without WLS?

Okay.  I'm back from the bad place now.  To answer your question directly, Janet, nothing would be different.  That's the start and the end of the enquiry, really.  I've been this person for most of my adult life and, without something to change the dynamic, there is no reason to expect a different result.  Thank you. 

congrats on your pre surgery weight loss, this will greatly help your body recover better.  So I understand you have reservations, everyone thinking about surgery should, but let's look at all the info you posted...you are 51, your bmi after losing 78 lbs is still not only morbidly obese, but you are in the super morbid obese.  I was bmi 61 to bmi 19 with the lap band.  I then revised to DS due to severe mechanical failures. I was not always obese,  I used to be a triathelete, an injury changed all that.   When you have a bmi that high and you are 51 you are in a different ball game.  You would still have to lose a significant amount of weight (yes any weight loss is a plus) to get weight off your joints, stress on organs etc.  not an easy thing to do, the question of you losing the 78 lbs would that sway me-NO.    2 weeks ago I had my thyroid removed, it was my 12th surgery.  I have had 6 abdominal surgeries.  You should be scared, if you weren't there would be something wrong with you, be scared. you have to take vit/min for the rest of your life, have your blood work to make sure you are not deficient.   You have a choice stay super morbid obese or have the surgery, to keep the weight off, do i think you can take it off-yes, keeping it off-it is stacked against you.  it basically comes down to that question.  for me revising to the DS was not a question, due to my esophogeal permanent damage the DS was the only surgery I could have-easy choice for me, either that or SMO, I chose surgery.  When I lost my lap band I gained 100 lbs (or 96 or right around there) that was so devastating, you can not understand.  I am now  normal weight again.  All our decisions or lack of decisions have consequences, give yourself and your bod yand your family a better quality of life,  I truly understand it is not an easy decision, but one you have to make and only you.  I wish you a great travel in the search to become healthy

Thank you, airbender.  I hope you are doing well after your latest surgery.  Were all of your surgeries related to one or the other of your bariatric surgeries?  I wasn't always obese either.  I used to be a division 1 college soccer player and could take off for a 10 mile run whenever I wanted.  When I blew out my ankle in my second year in college, and that was followed by increasing knee problems in my 20s, I started my long history of weight gain and loss and gain.  Are you able to compete again?  I can't tell you how I've missed that.  It was central to who I was and I would love to reachieve a fitness level that would permit it again.  I take your cautions to heart and I appreciate the fact that inspite of what appears to have been a very difficult road for you - at very least in terms of surgeries - you would still choose the DS.  Thanks for sharing that with me.

 Lawbouy,
Lots to dissect here! First, congrats on your approval - which apparently went verys smoothly and quickly. I remember those days. Congrats on the pre-op weight loss. I am sure your anxiety over the surgery is helping motivate you as well this time around. I think what others have said about the wieght loss not being our issue is the truth, at least it was for me. I certainly had lost the weight several times over! Keeping it off was the key for me. 

I think there is more reading you can do from other's pages on here and on the internet to learn what other DS'ers go through long term and how their lives are improved and restarted based on the wonderful impact of the surgery. I was very nervous about some of the same thing you are currently nervous about. I did not want to fail at something else! I knew DS was right for me when I knew people could keep the weight off and return to a fairly normal eating pattern and normal food intake - with some modifications - i can eat just about anything. 

I wish you luck! I know where you have been. I was 344 and am now down to 146 (I am 5'6.5" tall)!!! I would do it again in a minute. Keep in touch and friend me on here if you would like.