Feeling stupid for feeling depressed...

I feel like I should feel on top of the world.  I've gotten the surgery of my dreams, weight is coming off, and I have relatively little pain.  So, why am I feeling depressed?  I do have a couple of incisions that are looking red and one opened up and hurts but nothing unbearable, I'm on Cipro for the possible infection and not having any adverse reactions to that.  I'm drinking almost 64 ozs of liquids (will probably hit 64 tonight) and I'm not hungry even though I feel like I should eat something.  I've tried a few mushies and they've not caused any problems but they don't thrill me any either. 

I feel guilty that I'm feeling depressed.  There are people out there waiting, working, doing everything they can to get this done and now that I have I'm blue.  I don't regret having it and I sort of remember having some of these feelings when I had my lapband but not quite as strong.  There's that sense of being an outcast when your family is all eating and you can't, or when they're all headed out to do something that you're just not quite ready to do.  I've had to miss a couple of my boy's football games and while they say they understand and I know that in the long run I'll be able to go to more of them and feel better at them because of this surgery it's just hard to get past this point.

Has anyone else hit this wall?  Is this normal?  How did you get through it without wallowing too much in self-pity (which is what I really want to do...I'm such a baby).

Thanks for listening,

Im not depressed but Im just tired.  You still have quite a bit of medication in your body from surgery.  Give yourself a break.  Kudos on the fluid intake that is great. 

Keep a journal it helps-- what your feeling is normal.

We will be better in a few months!
JJ

Dawn, I think a little a bit of depression is normal.  I really can't remember the specific details of mine, but I think the "I've-been-hit-by-a-truck" feelings ran into  "what have I done to myself" and then was followed by 3 months of nausea.  But then about that time I could move better and felt better and the little bits of depression floated away. So jus****ch it for while and if it isn't getting better talk to a doc, and of course come here and talk any old time.  -Jenny

I think it's perfectly normal to feel this way as early out as you are. Get plenty of rest and water. Don't fret over eating, you'll get there soon enough. Just focus on fluids right now. I was very tired and that affected my mood a lot. Rest sweetie! Give your doc a heads up on your feelings and if it continues or gets worse, ask for an anti depressant. They work wonders! We're here for you girl!

Ruby

You sound completely normal to me.

Listen, NOTHING you put in your mouth is going to thrill you for a while. This is suck-it-up territory. Hydration and food are MEDICINE, not pleasure or anything else. Hang in there, because it will eventually change.

Some of this is because of all the drugs you've had. Some of it is a normal biophysical response to trauma and had nothing to do with your state of mind. You are not crazy and not strange. You are healing from a big-ass trauma/invasion and your body is devoting almost all resources to that. This means you'll feel like hell in any or all realms because there is nothing to devote to feeling well.

Quit wallowing and walk :-). It helps a LOT with everything you're going through.

I too went through a funk.  Mine presented as irrational irritation.  EVERYTHING irritated me.  Food wasn't good.  I was just pissy.  Yep, and feeling guilty about feeling pissy.

It gets better.  Give it two more months.  When you get those first 40 lbs off, it becomes a different world.  Body parts stop aching.  Stamina vastly improves.  Food starts becoming a little less revolting.  Smells aren't quite as obnoxious.  People aren't as annoying.  The weight loss starts becoming visible.  It just gets better.

I'm pre-op, so I can't say that it is normal after a DS, although I believe all the others have said just that.

However, I will say that each time I've been on Cipro it has changed my moods dramatically.  I get tearful and cranky and blah and everything in between.  My PCP said it does something to interfere with some type of hormone receptor and that it doesn't happen to everyone but the ones it happens to really struggle. 

Just putting it out there in case that is exacerbating it as well. 

I think some depression is very common after any surgery. And remember that with all the weight you are losing, you are releasing tons of hormones that will knock you out of wack. And remember that depression isn't something that you can control. It isn't a matter of feeling sorry for yourself. It is usually a chemical reaction. Hope you are feeling better soon. T

Oh boy, when I was at your stage I felt road rage. I swear I could have opened fire on strangers for even THINKING about getting into my lane and jeopardizing my children's well-being. I was a hormone mess! I just waited it out and the skies opened up for me one day.

Maybe it would help to talk to someone? Someone like a therapist who understands the weight loss hormone dump you're experiencing. This is real and important. Do not compare yourself to others and say "oh, I have nothing to complain about..."

And don't worry--you WILL eat again. You will eat so normally that the people around you will never know you had surgery. Your energy will keep increasing and you will be running through your days saying "what next? I can do more! Come on!" So, just hang in there.

Nicolle

 This sounds so familiar! I HATED the first month (almost a month and a half) after surgery. I was miserable and hated eating or drinking. I was crabby and in pain. Walking really does help, and what most are saying, wait. I'm at 3 months in 2 days and I feel amazing! I'm able to eat more things, I can drink water without pain and I'm active. Yes, I said ACTIVE! Give yourself some time to heal. Don't feel bad about how you're feeling right now. It's NORMAL. One day you'll wake up and feel wonderful.

Best Wishes on your Journey!!