Will you be the one to die?

dtabor5
on 8/21/11 1:16 pm
Bravo Kirmy!!! very well said.... we have all wondered what would happen if it did indeed happen and then the night before we are kicking ourselves for not updating our wills... but you won't need it!!!  It is major surgery, it hurts, and you will be so tired for a while... but it all goes away!!

OT Kirmy I will be in the UK in June I think... wanna meet up?

Denise
      

Denise T.
My Angel is MAJORMOM!!!

 MY DS!!!!
I see stupid people everywhere!!!
        
kirmy
on 8/21/11 10:33 pm - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
Yup Com and visit me in the Scottish Highlands!
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
dtabor5
on 8/21/11 11:18 pm
butercup
on 8/21/11 3:44 pm, edited 8/21/11 3:44 am - Kennewick, WA
I love you, thank you. I'm sitting here in tears because I've been worried that I'm going to die. This post reached out it's hand and pulled me out of my obsessive death watch.

Today I told my husband that we need to go to the water park because I may never get another chance. He asked me to stop, stop obsessing. Tried to tell me that I wasn't going to die and to stop. I just couldn't though. Stephanie's death really shook me. I know that she may still be here if she made other choices.

I have been consumed with the possibility of dying. I can't sleep, I'm so tense my muscle relaxers aren't working, and my nice new anxiety meds aren't doing anything either. Your words and %'s helped me come out of it.

I respect you and I trust you. Sure I could be the 1%, but most likely not. I'm going to be OK. My kids will still have a mother and my husband will still have his best friend. Thank you.

Sorry for the dramatics, it's just how I'm feeling at the moment.
kirmy
on 8/21/11 10:41 pm - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom
My girl fear is reasonable...obsessive thinking is indulgence.  Now its time for you to learn how to live in the moment.

I may die, you may die...death is just a normal part of every day living but we elevate ourselves above it all as humans and proportion too much importance to our own mortality.  Dogs don't spend their lives in a fug of horror they just get on with it.  Sentient beings like apes don't lead a life of terror at death...they live along side it without keeping it at arms length.  The bottom line is what can you actually control? You can not have your surgery and instead have a stroke or a heart attack and be dead within the year...you may die after surgery of complications .  What can you control? You could get hit by a falling tree and die.....what can you control?

Square you shoulders and be ****y...get on with it and live in the mother ******g moment.  That is all we have no get on with it!
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
dtabor5
on 8/21/11 11:23 pm
my maiden name is Robertson so i have some family to look up... I have a question... I saw on your comment about Happychick!!! what happened@!?@?@?@ I know i have been absent alot but what the hell happened?? i was thinking about her and wondering what she had been up to...
      

Denise T.
My Angel is MAJORMOM!!!

 MY DS!!!!
I see stupid people everywhere!!!
        
kirmy
on 8/22/11 2:40 am - BF-Nowhere, United Kingdom

Mickie went for plastics in Brussels and had a post surgical bleed.  She was nursed in a hotel not in a ward and the nurse was too slow to recognise her symptoms.  By the time they called an ambulance she was arresting.  She was revived and kept on a ventilator for a couple of weeks but was brain dead from oxygen starvation from the arrest and blood loss.

Truly awful. xx
            

RIP Mickie aka Happychick.  You will be missed deeply.
(deactivated member)
on 8/22/11 1:51 am - TX
Yes, Thank you from another scared ****less pre-op!  No matter how much I tell myself, the odds of LIVING are greater than my odds of dying in surgery.....it still creeps into my head.  I did email my surgeon about his stats.....when he didn't respond in a "timely" manner....I called his office and was told that he was TDY until the end of the month!  (i breathed a sigh of relief....cuz negative thoughts were in my head about why he wasn't answering my email)

thanks for all of you "vets" that pay this forward!! 
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