Need a New Anti Depressant....
Thank You Elizabeth,
I did call my insurance and I got bounced around and around...and around. BUT I eventually got the claim that I am covered for psych no limit on $$ amount or visits. Seemed way too easy and of course it wasn't. I called the only psych from the website that was even remotely close to me (37.8 miles) and her office advised me that she is strictly a child/adolescent psych, BUT They claim that the other doctors in the office accept my insurance with no prob. I cross referenced two of the doctors she mentioned with the provider finder and neither came up. So Im not sre about seeing them, Im guessing that they are out of network which is why they don't show up on the provider finder. The other psych are 50 miles away and 62 miles away. But thanks everyone so much.
I did call my insurance and I got bounced around and around...and around. BUT I eventually got the claim that I am covered for psych no limit on $$ amount or visits. Seemed way too easy and of course it wasn't. I called the only psych from the website that was even remotely close to me (37.8 miles) and her office advised me that she is strictly a child/adolescent psych, BUT They claim that the other doctors in the office accept my insurance with no prob. I cross referenced two of the doctors she mentioned with the provider finder and neither came up. So Im not sre about seeing them, Im guessing that they are out of network which is why they don't show up on the provider finder. The other psych are 50 miles away and 62 miles away. But thanks everyone so much.
Perhaps you also need to lose the excess weight and baggage of your mother.
You might be suprised by what you are no longer wiling to put up with after you have had the DS and lost some of the weight. So many of us believe that since we are MO, we have to be doormats; that changes and is why so many relationships change after we lose weight - we also lose the willingness to be crapped on by toxic people.
You are a better woman than I to allow your mother to stay in your life; at the very least I would set some serious boundaries for your health and wellbeing. (Like with the lunch fiasco - I would have told her she couldn't come in to drop off the lunch and that she was behaving inappropriately. That I was my own woman and since my hubbie wasn't complaining, she should STFU.)
Getting the med balance right is tough. I've been trying to walk that fine line myself for years.
Good luck.
Kim
You might be suprised by what you are no longer wiling to put up with after you have had the DS and lost some of the weight. So many of us believe that since we are MO, we have to be doormats; that changes and is why so many relationships change after we lose weight - we also lose the willingness to be crapped on by toxic people.
You are a better woman than I to allow your mother to stay in your life; at the very least I would set some serious boundaries for your health and wellbeing. (Like with the lunch fiasco - I would have told her she couldn't come in to drop off the lunch and that she was behaving inappropriately. That I was my own woman and since my hubbie wasn't complaining, she should STFU.)
Getting the med balance right is tough. I've been trying to walk that fine line myself for years.
Good luck.
Kim
~ Kim ~
HW - 283 SW - 257.5 Goal - 156
Thanks to all the DS vets who have paid it forward - I <3 you guys!
Looking for DS support & information? Check out : http://weightlosssurgery.proboards.com/index.cgi
HW - 283 SW - 257.5 Goal - 156
Thanks to all the DS vets who have paid it forward - I <3 you guys!
Looking for DS support & information? Check out : http://weightlosssurgery.proboards.com/index.cgi
Yes, dealing with my mom is a challenge all its own. Like most narcississts she alternates from bully to victim in the blink of an eye. And then, as mentioned she will LIE. I grew quite a bit of a backbone when she almost ruined my marriage. Long story short,. We were house hunting, and she insisted we use her former realtor, fine. This realtor is incompetent at best, but thats what my mom does.. find people she can talk down to or people who will have to "owe" her. This realtor was just plain ole bad. She found house after house that we hated. Initially we would go see the houses to be open minded and good sports even though they were almost the polor opposite of what we asked for. Once we rejected a house, the stupid realtor would send us an email of an almost identical house. She had this bizarre thing for condos, which we specifically said we ddint want. Anyhow, one day, my mom begs me to come look at a "house" (it was really a condo.) We go, and its a small super small condo on two levels. At most maybe it was 900- 1000 sq ft...ON TWO LEVELS. It had smoked mirrors, wood paneling, fake hardwood floors, a BLACK marbled vanity ioin the bathroom. Shag carpet in the bedrooms and a very strong stench of urine. And best believe my mother put a contract on the unit. For us. She for some reason thought we would live in and subsequently py her for a house that was in terrible shape, and that we didnt care for. But of course the condo was about 5 minutes from her house. I was weak, and emotionally damaged and I begged my husband to simply live there for a few months till she could sell it etc etc. He stood firm...we got closer and closer to the closing date. My husband wasn't budging, rightfully so.
Everyday until closing she would call and harass me. OK? can we understand this...I was a full grown woman, married with o kid of my own and she decided to go out a pick out a home for me and my family that were supposed to pay for. I don't want this mistaken as mom giving the kids a starter home as a gift...no. Tthen when we have the nerve to NOT go along with it. She calls everyday with venom and anger, swearing and eventually hanging up on me EVERYDAY for about 5 or 6 weeks. My husband gave me an ultimatum and said if I fell for her crap AGAIN then he was done, meaning WE were done. By this time in our relationship she had pulled so much crap on his, and my saint of a husband always tolerated it. He *****ed and moaned but he always helped me give into her. She went through with her closing. The condo was a money pit. She had to replace washer, dryer, water heater and air conditioner. The original washer and dryer were connected so that they vented into the attic, which rotted the entire upper structure of he house. the beams were molded and the dry wall cracked wide open and collapsed in one of the bedrooms. The wood around the windows was rotted to the point that the glass panes would fall out when u opened or closed them. She couldnt get a tenant, couldnt resell it and had to do a short sale about a year later. I couldnt understand any of what she had done. It would be one thing if the house she bougt were wonderful, and a upgrade of sorts to what we could afford or were currently in. It would be one thing if the house was as close as she could get to what we wanted. It would have even been ok if the house were updated and in reasonably good shape. ANY of those would be somewhat understandable. But the house was pretty awful. I couldnt figure out wtf was going on. Did she hate me? Then one day, my very best friend said...your mom is a narcissist. I knew of it, but when I read their traits...I knew she absolutely was. I realized that pleasing her would never happen. That she will always find a way to be critical and therefore better than. I set boundries immediately. I haven't cut her out of my life fully YET, because my oldest son loves her. She loves men/male kids so I don't worry that any of her crapfest will be reigned on him. If I knew then what I know now...I absolutely woudl have cut her loose a LONG time ago. My husbands job is slowly moving people out of state...We expect that he will be among those leaving within the next year. Once we're gone...we're gone. As for now, I simply ignore her. The lunch fiasco as you so perfectly described it doesn't bother me, and maybe it should. But I'm really..ummm how do I say this...detatched from her. Her actions don't phase me anymore, and maybe they should. Maybe this is not a good thing. BUt I allow her to see my kids, cause she actually is very good with them, and they love her. But beyond that...Im mostly hanging in there until we move.
Again, another rant...Sorry
Edited for clarity/typos due to the rapid typing of a somewhat bitter woman
Everyday until closing she would call and harass me. OK? can we understand this...I was a full grown woman, married with o kid of my own and she decided to go out a pick out a home for me and my family that were supposed to pay for. I don't want this mistaken as mom giving the kids a starter home as a gift...no. Tthen when we have the nerve to NOT go along with it. She calls everyday with venom and anger, swearing and eventually hanging up on me EVERYDAY for about 5 or 6 weeks. My husband gave me an ultimatum and said if I fell for her crap AGAIN then he was done, meaning WE were done. By this time in our relationship she had pulled so much crap on his, and my saint of a husband always tolerated it. He *****ed and moaned but he always helped me give into her. She went through with her closing. The condo was a money pit. She had to replace washer, dryer, water heater and air conditioner. The original washer and dryer were connected so that they vented into the attic, which rotted the entire upper structure of he house. the beams were molded and the dry wall cracked wide open and collapsed in one of the bedrooms. The wood around the windows was rotted to the point that the glass panes would fall out when u opened or closed them. She couldnt get a tenant, couldnt resell it and had to do a short sale about a year later. I couldnt understand any of what she had done. It would be one thing if the house she bougt were wonderful, and a upgrade of sorts to what we could afford or were currently in. It would be one thing if the house was as close as she could get to what we wanted. It would have even been ok if the house were updated and in reasonably good shape. ANY of those would be somewhat understandable. But the house was pretty awful. I couldnt figure out wtf was going on. Did she hate me? Then one day, my very best friend said...your mom is a narcissist. I knew of it, but when I read their traits...I knew she absolutely was. I realized that pleasing her would never happen. That she will always find a way to be critical and therefore better than. I set boundries immediately. I haven't cut her out of my life fully YET, because my oldest son loves her. She loves men/male kids so I don't worry that any of her crapfest will be reigned on him. If I knew then what I know now...I absolutely woudl have cut her loose a LONG time ago. My husbands job is slowly moving people out of state...We expect that he will be among those leaving within the next year. Once we're gone...we're gone. As for now, I simply ignore her. The lunch fiasco as you so perfectly described it doesn't bother me, and maybe it should. But I'm really..ummm how do I say this...detatched from her. Her actions don't phase me anymore, and maybe they should. Maybe this is not a good thing. BUt I allow her to see my kids, cause she actually is very good with them, and they love her. But beyond that...Im mostly hanging in there until we move.
Again, another rant...Sorry
Edited for clarity/typos due to the rapid typing of a somewhat bitter woman
Oh my god. We're sisters because we CLEARLY have the same damn mother! YAY I always wanted a sister! Well I have one actually, she literally replaced me when she was born 9 years after me. Sorry, I'll just save that little nugget for my therapist. She's still on vacation. I don't get to see her till next Wednesday. I needed to ***** to somebody. 
Wish I could help about the meds. I was misdiagnosed with depression for all of my teen years. I've been on everything and nothing worked. It made me feel manic and then crash. I was in Hell. I actually have ADD and it can mimic a lot of depression symptoms. I also had a nightmare of a mom and dad and older brother. Whew, I need my therapist huh?
Wish I could help about the meds. I was misdiagnosed with depression for all of my teen years. I've been on everything and nothing worked. It made me feel manic and then crash. I was in Hell. I actually have ADD and it can mimic a lot of depression symptoms. I also had a nightmare of a mom and dad and older brother. Whew, I need my therapist huh?
Okay, I have read the posts so far. The standard for many cases is to start with one of these SSRIs:
fluoxetine (generic of Prozac)
sertraline (generic of Zoloft)
citalopram (generic of Celexa)
Lexapro (it's generic name is escitalopram, but I don't think it is available as a generic yet) -- it is a younger sister to Celexa, basically. For the most part, I'd wait to see if one of the earlier listed ones works first, since this one still costs more.
paroxetine (generic of Paxil) -- I would wait on this one, since it so often causes weight gain.
I don't like to promote Wal-Mart, but they did start the $4 prescription program, and some of the other chains will now match it. I think fluoxetine and citalopram are on the $4 list. I think sertraline is not on the list, but it is pretty low-cost now, as prescriptions go, and I think on many preferred drug formularies for the cheapest-tier copay. Some of the insurance formularies require you to try citalopram first before they will cover Lexapro.
It's not a first-line treatment, nor an SSRI, but this is just a comment about mirtazapine (generic of Remeron) -- I would avoid it, or at least wait on it, due to its frequent weight gain side effect.
I think you can get by a little longer getting your depression and anxiety medication through your local primary care doctor, since you say there has been trouble finding a nearby specialist. (I also say this because, to start out with, the chances of success with one of the first of those listed meds are around the same for each of them, whether monitored and chosen by a generalist or a specialist. Also, the fact that you are likely to move soon: you can wait until you are in your new town and try for a psychiatrist there, or sooner if you feel worse or the next trial or few trials don't work out. After you can give details on what went poorly or well with the things tried is when it is more important to use a psychiatrist, who knows more about what to mix, try next, etc.) Either way, whether you request this or not, and whether through primary care or through psychiatry, I predict the prescriber will have you try one of the ones I listed above, which I think should be tried before, say, venlafaxine (Effexor).
here is a short article:
www.consumerreports.org/health/best-buy-drugs/antidepressant s.htm
or it's longer report:
www.consumerreports.org/health/resources/pdf/best-buy-drugs/ Antidepressants_update.pdf
fluoxetine (generic of Prozac)
sertraline (generic of Zoloft)
citalopram (generic of Celexa)
Lexapro (it's generic name is escitalopram, but I don't think it is available as a generic yet) -- it is a younger sister to Celexa, basically. For the most part, I'd wait to see if one of the earlier listed ones works first, since this one still costs more.
paroxetine (generic of Paxil) -- I would wait on this one, since it so often causes weight gain.
I don't like to promote Wal-Mart, but they did start the $4 prescription program, and some of the other chains will now match it. I think fluoxetine and citalopram are on the $4 list. I think sertraline is not on the list, but it is pretty low-cost now, as prescriptions go, and I think on many preferred drug formularies for the cheapest-tier copay. Some of the insurance formularies require you to try citalopram first before they will cover Lexapro.
It's not a first-line treatment, nor an SSRI, but this is just a comment about mirtazapine (generic of Remeron) -- I would avoid it, or at least wait on it, due to its frequent weight gain side effect.
I think you can get by a little longer getting your depression and anxiety medication through your local primary care doctor, since you say there has been trouble finding a nearby specialist. (I also say this because, to start out with, the chances of success with one of the first of those listed meds are around the same for each of them, whether monitored and chosen by a generalist or a specialist. Also, the fact that you are likely to move soon: you can wait until you are in your new town and try for a psychiatrist there, or sooner if you feel worse or the next trial or few trials don't work out. After you can give details on what went poorly or well with the things tried is when it is more important to use a psychiatrist, who knows more about what to mix, try next, etc.) Either way, whether you request this or not, and whether through primary care or through psychiatry, I predict the prescriber will have you try one of the ones I listed above, which I think should be tried before, say, venlafaxine (Effexor).
here is a short article:
www.consumerreports.org/health/best-buy-drugs/antidepressant s.htm
or it's longer report:
www.consumerreports.org/health/resources/pdf/best-buy-drugs/ Antidepressants_update.pdf
Most Active
Recent Topics
