NOT A HAPPY CAMPER

WELL I GONNA VENT TODAY AND I HAVE SO MUCH ANGER IN ME RIGHT NOW I COULD SPIT NAILS.I KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY FOR THINGS BUT I GET SO SICK AND TIRED OF HAVING TO LIVE LIKE THIS,I HAVE BEEN OFF MY DEPRESSION PILLS FOR THREE DAYS AND I'M TRYING TO MAKE THEM LAST AND NOT MAKE MY HUSBAND FEEL BAD TOO,HE DOESN'T KNOW I'M DOING THIS,I HAVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR COUPLE OF WEEKS AND NOW IT IS REALLY TAKING A TOLL ON ME,I AM HAVING THE WITHDRAWLS ALSO FROM NOT TAKING MY MEDS REGULARLY,BUT I AM THINKING OF MY HUSBAND FOR HE NEEDS HIS MEDS FOR HIS HEART.SO IT'S LIKE THIS I'M IN A TERRIBLE MOOD AND I DON'T CARE AT THIS POINT AND I KNOW THIS ISN'T LIKE ME SEE EVERYONE I'M NOT PERFECT I'M REALLY HAVING A OFF DAY AND ALSO I HAVE SOMETHING ELSE TO SAY TO SOME PEOPLE WHO JUST DON'T CARE WHAT THEY SAY OR NOT THINKING BEFORE THEY OPEN THERE MOUTH BUT LIKE WHEN YOUR HELPING SOMEONE OUT YOU RESPECT OTHERS FEELINGS LIKE WHEN YOUR TALKING ABOUT WEIGHT YES WE ARE DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT BUT WHEN A PERSON IS TOLD OF HOW MUCH YOU USE TO WEIGH YOU DON'T AND GO AND SAY OH GOD I HOPE I NEVER GET THAT BIG COME ON HERE WE HAVE FEELINGS TOO,HOW DO YOU THINK THIS MAKES A PERSON FEEL ESPECIALLY WHEN OUR ESTEEM IS LOW,MAYBE YOUR NOT AS BIG AS SOME OF US BE WE HAVE FEELINGS AND TO TELL YOU THIS THAT FEELINGS WAS HURT HERE.NONE OF YOU MAY NOT LIKE ME NOW BUT MY HEART WAS HURT TO HEAR OF THIS AND I NEVER LOOK DOWN ON NO ONE FOR I'M ALSO THERE WITH OPEN ARMS AND I DO RESPECT ALL OF YOU,I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW PLEASE THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK,MAYBE YOU DIDN'T THINK IT WAS GOING TO HURT SOMEONES FEELINGS,IT'S OK TO BE BLUNT TO A POINT BUT PLEASE WE ARE JUST TRYING TO BUILD OUR SELF ESTEEM UP HERE.I KNOW I PROBALLY NOT MAKING SINCE ALL I'M ASKING IS CONSIDER OUR FEELINGS TOO.I DO KNOW THAT I CARE ABOUT EACH AND EVERYONE ON HERE AND PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR NOT BEING MYSELF,SOON I HOPE I WILL BE BACK TO THE BONNIE YOU ALL KNOW.I LOVE YA ALL IT'S OK IF YOU WANT TO TELL ME OFF BUT I JUST HAD TO VENT TOO.TAKE CARE YOUR FRIEND BONNIE

Sweetie, I lived through 10 years of depression. I do know how you feel. And I am so proud that you recognize where the anger is coming from. It's hard. It's hard daily even when you are on your medication. Bonnie, Call the doctor that prescribed for you. Ask him/her if they by chance have any samples on hand to get you through to the next payday. They just might. And if they don't, do you have enough funds to buy enough to get you through the next payday? The pharmacy will let you do that. You will get back to being the Bonnie you love soon. Hang in there sweetie. Fight through that depression. I know you can do it. Remember, there is no hole so deep that God can't reach down and hold you. Lean on Him. I love you!! Gigee

HELLO GIGEE YOU MADE ME CRY AND I REALLY NEEDED TO CRY.I KNOW GOD CAN DO ALL THINGS,BUT SOMETIMES YOU FEEL LIKE YOUR SO ALONE IN THIS AND GIGEE IT'S NOT TIL NEXT PAY TIME IT'S LIKE THIS FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL MONTHS OR SO,I ALWAYS THINK OF MY HUSBAND FIRST AND I REALLY REALLY TRY TO BE NICE BUT GOING THREW THE WITHDRAWALS AND FACING HAVING NO MONEY FOR THE THINGS THAT ARE REALLY NEEDED REALLY GETS TO ME AND I AM SO HATEFUL AND I DON'T WANT TO BE.IT MAKES MY HUSBAND FEEL BAD BECAUSE HE TRYS SO HARD AND IT HURTS HIM BECAUSE HE KNOWS I NEED MY PROTEIN AND MEDS AND NOT BEING ABLE TO BUY FOOD.MY DAUGHTER HELPS WITH WHAT SHE CAN AND IT MAKES ME FEEL BAD FOR I KNOW SHE IS HAVING A HARD TIME TOO.ALL I WANTED TO DO IS SLEEP TODAY AND I DID,SOMETIMES IT'S BETTER FOR ME AT LEAST I'M NOT HURTING ANYONE OR GETTING ON MY OWN NERVES.THANK YOU FOR THE LOVE GIGEE YOUR FRIEND BONNIE

hi mom i am here to let you know that you are not alone i know how you feel about the financial situations as well as the depression and feelings being hurt i am here to let you know like you have let others on here know that it is ok to vent no matter what it is about i am going to go ahead and tell them it was my feelings that got hurt but i have moved on and i am doing just fine some people just don't have the consideration of others feelings and that is fine i just turned the other cheek and all is fine and well so don't let it get you down because i am not all i know is that i am alot healthier now and i like the results i see and you are doing a good job too so lets just keep positive ok i know you will be just fine you need me i am here for you ok just give me a holler ok love you always your daughter vickie p.s. no hard feelings here i love this site and n one will get me down if you all want to talk or need help i am here also just e-mail me ok thanks your friend vickie

THANK YOU SO MUCH VICKIE FOR REPLYING TO MY POST AND THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT,YOU MEAN EVERYTHING TO ME.I DON'T MEAN TO BRING ANYONE ELSE DOWN BUT I AM HUMAN TOO AND I NEED TO VENT TOO.I CAN SAY YOUR ALWAYS THERE FOR ME AND I WOULD BE LOST WITHOUT YOU.I'M SO VERY PROUD OF YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE,JUST KEEP YOUR HEAD UP AND YOUR DOING A AMAZING JOB.YOUR MY ANGEL SWEETIE. I LOVE YOU SO VERY MUCH,LOVE MOM

Hi Bonnie, It's okay to vent, all of us have to do it someday. Just keep your head up and pray. GOD will work things out. I have seen GOD work things out at the very last and final minute. Don't beat yourself up over it. We are all hear for you. I will keep you in my prayers. Christie

HELLO CHRISTIE YOU JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO ME TO SEE YOU POST TO MY POST.YOU ARE A VERY SPECIAL YOUNG LADY AND YOU MEAN ALOT TO ME.ME SENDING YOU ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) THANK YOU FOR PRAYING FOR ME IT HAS BEEN A ROUGH TIME FOR ME AND THIS IS WHY I TELL EVERYONE ON HERE NO I'M NOT PERFECT AND I GET DOWN AND MOODY TOO AND I NEED EVERYONES SUPPORT TOO.I'M ONLY HUMAN.THIS IS WHY I ASK EVERYONE TO KEEP THIS LITTLE BOARD HOPPING FOR NOT ONLY IT HELPS OTHERS IT HELPS ME TOO.THANK YOU SO MUCH,TAKE CARE MY FRIEND. YOUR FRIEND BONNIE

I am sorry you are not feeling well....I don't really understand depression but I do know its something not to play with....Check out resources that Gigee mentioned to help you. You should feel good not bad. Don't feel that you don't deserve the help...every now and then we all need it. Bonnie, you need to start looking out for yourself. Be good to yourself....find a way to get the meds you need to keep you going...You are worth it! Debbie

HELLO DEBBIE,I KNEW YOU WOULD BE HERE TO SUPPORT ME TOO AND I DEEPLY THANK YOU IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME.I TOLD CHRISTIE THIS IS WHY I ASK EVERYONE TO KEEP THIS LITTLE BOARD HOPPING WITH POST BECAUSE I NEED IT TOO.THE MORE I CAN HELP OTHERS THE LESS I THINK OF MY PROBLEMS.SO WHEN MY PROBLEMS RISE TO WHERE I CAN'T TAKE IT I KNOW I CAN COUNT ON YOU GUYS TO GIVE ME ADVICE AND LOVE AND SUPPORT.THIS HELPS US ALL TO GROWN IN OUR OWN WAY.I SURE CAN'T WAIT TO ME YOU.I DO FEEL BETTER,THANK YOU MY FRIEND,TAKE CARE YOUR FRIEND BONNIE ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Bonnie, We are all here for you. I take meds for depression also. It is a hard thing. I am happy you felt comfortable enough to use this site to vent. We are all listening. I can't wait to meet you on Saturday. Lots of Hugs. Ellen