I am loosing my support.....

Of all people to give up on me....my husband!!!! He says that maybe the reason I am having so much trouble getting approved is because the surgery is not meant to be. That just makes me even more determined, but I don't like loosing my husbands support. And people from church will come up to me and ask when is my surgery, and I will tell them I am waiting for insurance approval, and they say...I hope you don't have it. I am hearing that soooooo much I am starting to believe myself I may not have it. Help these people are making me crazy I think I need some hugs from my message board buddies. Dana

Hugs!!!!hugs!!!!!!hugs!!!!!!!Dana....you have my support and the support of the board that have been there and are going through the same things...but keep looking up to GOD for he will you bring you through....we love you and we care...Gail Burke

Dear Sweat Dana, {{{HUGS}}} Oh honey, I truly do feel for you. I only wish I could reach through this computer and give you a real honest to goodness hug. I truly believe that no one wants to cause you harm nor be non-supportive, but that does not mean that they truly know what is best for you. Please remember that you, your doctor and the Lord are the one's that are truly informed about your health and this surgery. Likely all your friends at church and even your husband does not fully understand your need for this surgery. Most likely when they see you, you have your game face on ... all smiles. They don't see you late at night when your body is aching, when you feel you can't take another step. Dana, hang in there and continue to hold on tight to your dream. Please, please do not let other people discourage you. They love you and want what is best for you of course, but do they really know what is best for you? Most of them only know what they have heard ... and what we hear is usually not all that reliable. My dear sweet grandma always told me "Believe nothing you hear and only half what you see." IMHO - Pretty wise words. Of course there are exceptions to that as the Bible tells us that Faith comes by hearing the Word of God ... but speaking in general terms ... in this world we have to guard our ears, eyes and heart. I have been praying for you Dana and will continue to pray. Please take this before the Lord and allow Him to hold you and offer you peace. Thank you for allowing us, your friends, the opportunity to lift you up and hold you close. Hugs, Tammy

Dear Dana...... I'm sending you a big ((hug)) I know what you are talking about and my heart goes out to you. Its so frustrating! Our families care and love us very much, but they don't realize how much pain our bodies feel.... ankles, knees, back, breathing, etc....., only we know that pain. We also have to accept and understand their fears, but in the end we must be true to ourselves. We are all here for you! ((hugs)) Patti C

Dana- Give yourself a big hug, for coming here to get the support you need right now. Who knows what your destiny is, but you first and formost have to believe in yourself. It is you who can make that insurance company understand the necessity of the surgery or it is you who will find another way if that is your wish. Believe in Yourself. You have the power and knowledge. Surround yourself with positive people and support. Hope to see you at the VA meeting tonight. Big hugs! Keep your chin up! and Pray! Nicki

Hi Dana, I guess some can put a negative spin on the timing by saying it isn't meant to be...but I prefer to say the delays are so the timing is perfect! Keep your eyes on the prize and keep your focus. You have the support of all of us. I know sometimes it's not the same, but when you feel overwhelmed just close your eyes and take a few minutes to remember that you have all these people you have never even laid eyes on in your corner. Hang tough, you'll be a loser in no time! Linda

Oh Dana!!!!! Here's a big ole (((((HUG))))) Don't give up. I think that those who are telling you to give up may be just scared for you, because they love you. It's natural. This surgery has been in the media so much lately, and it seems to focus on the bad side - while it is imperative to know all aspects of the risks, this surgery has done so much good for so many. And to be honest, I said the same things about the surgery several years ago - until I did the research - and by the time my surgery date finally rolled around, I was ready. God does things in His time - not ours - just use this time to continue to educate yourself and those around you of all aspects of the surgery. It will help them to understand it better, and hopefully, support you in the way you need it. Lastly, remember, we are all here for you - to support you and to pray for you - and we are all doing both! ((((HUGS)))) Carla

Dana, Many hugs to you. Hang in there. It will get better. I'll say a couple of extra prayers for you this evening. Take care, Deb

(((Dana))) Keep the faith. I had several ups and down with my insurance companies and started to feel that way myself sometimes. It just strengthened my resolve that it was meant to be and that I just need to be that much stronger about my desire to have a healthier life. I have several friends and a couple of family members who did not want me to take this journey; however, I know I did it for the right reasons. Your hubby is probably a lot like mine - wants whatever makes you happy but gets scared at the thought of all the negative things that we hear lately in the media, as someone else mentioned. You are in my thoughts and prayers and hopefully your insurance problems will resolve themselves soon. Take care, Patty

Dear Dana, hang in there. You have come so far already. Be patient a little longer. Only you can make this decision. You have done all of the right things, you have done your homework and researched for several months and have learned quite a lot. You have made your decision based on all of the facts that you have compiled. As my surgery approaches I feel apprehensive and I spoke with my doctor in detail. He said something to me that really makes a lot of sense. He said you should be more afraid of the risks of not doing something to improve your condition than of the risks involved with the procedure. If you are having medical problems now associated with weight it only gets worse as you get older. As far as insurance companies are concerned naturally they are going to make it difficult, it is costing them money. In fact I heard after the first of the year that Blue Cross/Blue Sheild would not be covering the surgery. I asked my doctor why and he said that so many people are having this procedure that it is costing them too much money. (I can believe that). As far as your husband have a heart to heart with him. It is out of concern for you more than anything. My daughter had this surgery March 24th and I supported her and her decision but as the time came close, I was second guessing her decision. I was doing that out of love and concern. You might say at that point I was a hypocrit (sp) after all I was having the surgery almost a month later. The moment that the doctor came to tell me everything went well and she was fine I was ok and knew she had made the right decision. Step back and regain your perspective and remember what brought you to this decision to begin with. God Bless and I will be thinking of you. Take care.