RE: Just a little BUMP! OUCH! *grin*

Okay guys, I have received so many emails and phone calls wondering if I was alright. First off, please let me thank each of you for your concern. It is truly appreciated more than I can put into words. Please know that I am so sorry to have worried anyone, it certainly was not my intention. I am just going through somewhat of a slump and while it is a rough one, I will get through it. I have been spending more time in the Word and Prayer and less time on the boards and in photo volunteering. I figure I really can't be of much help to others until I find myself on solid ground once again. While I don't usually share this I guess you all have a right to know why I am being so remote. This is a hard time of the year for me under the best cir****tances, but now with the emotional roller-coaster ride of the surgery added to it, it has become a little harder. You see, this is the time of year that I should be celebrating my twins birthday. However, they went to be with the Lord in the late 90's, so instead, I mourn their loss. You would think it would get easier with time, and to some degree it does, but I still miss them and it still hurts at times, especially around their birthday. But trust that I am relying upon the comfort of the Lord and He always helps carry me though. I am trusting that that He will pull me through this time as well. So guys, please know that I am alright, like I said, simply going through somewhat of a hard time. This year is a little harder than last, but I completely understand the reasoning behind that. I was thrown for somewhat of a loop near their birthday that coupled with the flood of hormones (can be almost unbelievable after the surgery at times). *rolling eyes* I can certainly see why they make you go see a shrink before surgery!!! *grin* BTW - She told me to expect this, and she was right, she also told me to expect that I would pull though just fine, and again, she was right!!! So while I know to expect some emotional ups and downs, especially around these times of natural emotional stress, I also know that I am going to be alright. At any rate ... Do I regret the surgery yet? NOT for a second!!! I am feeling better physically than I have since I was in my late teens early 20's. As a matter of fact, I was talking to my 19 yr old yesterday and he was asking me about my weight and loss ... etc. and it suddenly hit me. I am smaller now than when I got pregnant for him. He has never seen me at this size before! What a revelation that was for me! Oh, and hubby took me out Saturday and bought me a pair of jeans ... said he felt so bad watching me walk around in pants that were to big. I was able to get a size 20 petite in slim fitting JEANS. (and they were on clearance - double bonus) I also tried on dress clothing and was easily fitting into 18-20's. Again, what a thrill!!! So I say all of that to say, please don't let my slump cause you any concerns about your upcoming surgery. I am still so very blessed to be given this opportunity and am thrilled with the results thus far and am extrememly blessed to have found such a wonderful group of lovingly supportive buds and buddettes!!! Hugs to each of you! Tammy

You are INCREDIBLE Tammy!!! hope

Yes, she is!!! Love ya, girl!! (((hugs))) -Karen

Tammy, I will say some extra prayers for you. I am so sorry for your loss. May the Lord bless you and your family and keep you safe. I'll be thinking of you. Deb

Tammy, God does lift us up during these tmes of stress. Know that we will all be praying for you. Your smiling face was missed on Saturday. Did you feel us talking about our concern for you last night on the MSN chat? Glad someone got to you so that we could see that our sister is okay. You've been there for us and We'll be there for you. Elissa

Hi Tammy, It's understandable things would be difficult right now, as much as we'd like to hurry them along I guess they have their own time table. I hope you are feeling better soon and congratulations on your jeans and other little victories. Linda

Hi Tammy, First I want to say....my heart goes out to you. Loosing family members is never easy no matter how long it has been. I will keep you in my prayers, God will make things easier for you. Second I want to say my daughter and I are sorry we missed you at the meeting on Saturday, I spotted CJ, and Kathy and Karen and introduced myself. But we missed you, there is always the next one, which I will leave 2hrs early for, so I don't have to stand for the whole thing. Well you take care, oh by the way!!! way to go on the jeans!!Dana

Tammy, My heart goes out to you and your family. I totally understand your priorities. Hope that you can join us soon. We all miss you. One thing there is no shortage of with this group is support. Hate to coach you, but just remember even when your feeling low keep getting that protein intake and daily vitamins. You give a lot of your heart to each of us, and I for one certainly appreciate it, and love the motivation you give to each of us. Your bud, Rob

Hey Tam, my heart goes out to you, what a tremendous loss. I know all things happen for a reason but when they involve our children it can be so very hard to find an answer. A ladder to lead us out of the darkness. I can only imagine your pain as it is very personal and everyone handles grief in different ways, on different levels. I lost a baby when I was just pregnant. Just 10 weeks and it rocked my world for a very long time. It still gets to me at certain times of the year. I am so glad that in your life you have a close relationship to God and know that he will get you through. In the hardest and lowest times he has always shone his light on me and I am sure you feel that warmth and love. I think you are a great person with tremendous strength and faith. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask.

I'm so sorry that you had to go through such a difficult time. Remember I'm only a phone call away - 24/7 and I mean it!! We angels must take care of one another!! It's so good to see your smiling face back on the boards - but...am I mistaken or had you changed your picture to a red shirt - then back to this denim one????? or am i ???? ((hugs)) Carla