Update On Emily's "Death?"

Remember the post that I posted a week or two ago on the death of Emily? Well it looks like it may have been a hoax ... check out this new thread on the main board. http://www.obesityhelp.com/morbidobesity/messageboard/postdetail/146906.html?vc=0 I AM IN TEARS HERE ... why would someone do that? "Emily's death?" truly sent me into a tailspin and I have been having such a rough time since I heard and now to find out it may have been someone's sick joke??????? I have had trouble functioning ... for the past couple of weeks I have been mourning her passing and now I read this? My heart aches at such an idea. Those questions are all rhetorical of course ... I am just so hurt and amazed that someone would play with others emotions that way. That is truly horrid! I can not imagine in my wildest dreams how someone dreamed up such a awful thing ... and yet I am reading about it on the main board. Now I simply don't know what to think/feel ... which is worse? Emily really did pass away or someone really did lie about it? Thanks for allowing me to vent. Hugs, Tammy

Hi Tammy, This may sound kind of harsh but unfortunately this is a fact of internet life and happens more often than not. I have been a member of online communities for 5 years now and I have seen it a million times. Eventually everyone who participates in anything like this for any length of time learns how much to "invest" of your real life in an other person. Please take everything you read with about a pound of salt.

Tammy, Don't beat yourself up. There are cruel, sick, nasty people out there. Emily obviously is viscious as well. You only passed on feelings for a bereaving family. Imagine how the poor people in Rhode Island felt and how she could potentially ruin a Good Doctor's career. People like like that will have due jugement. ((HUGS))

My original reply has been nagging at me. I'm sure I came across as being rather heartless and really don't mean to seem that way. I forget that there are people who haven't encountered this along the way yet and it IS shocking when it you first realize people are capable of pulling such crap. Maybe it would help if I explained a bit. A long time ago I became friends with another woman who was also diabetic ( we met thru a huge diabetic community) everything was pretty good until she started showing signs of being kind of strange. It got to the point if I didn't post a reply to one of her posts or speak exclusively to her in a group chat she would get mad. Once she was threatening to kill herself, I sat on the phone with 911 while they tracked her down, she lived in a very remote South Carolina town. They got there and guess what? Not a damn thing wrong with her, it was all an act. Several other incidents happened..not as severe as that..but I managed to extricate her from my life. NO easy job either. I have seen people fake their death, I have seen people fake horrible diseases such as terminal cancer etc. It is so hard after awhile to see people get caught up in their crap. I think after awhile you learn to spot them and they lose their effect on you. The problem is there is no shortage of caring people in the world for them to prey on with their games. When I say be careful how much of yourself you invest in online relationships, I don't mean to sound cruel or imply that you should be less of who you are ( an obviously caring person ) all I mean is for you to save that energy for those in your life that need you like your hubby, kids, other family and friends. Yes by all means don't lose compassion for a stranger, because this world would be an awful place if everyone were to do that. I guess it is the level of grief you are experiencing for an occasional email friendship had me concerned. Online like 3-D life can produce some wonderful relationships. I have encountered thousands of people over the years and am glad to say I have made several long lasting real friendships, people I would trust with everything. I hope this is coming across in the spirit which it's intended. I just hate to see you get caught up in the cycle of feeling bad during what should be an incredible time in your life. Linda

Tammy, People are cruel and hurtful. You have a really big heart and are sensitive to other people and their needs. It's really wonderful that you are that way with everyone. Unfortunately, when you care about other people so much, you end up getting hurt. I understand, because I end up in this situation also. I'm just going to pray for the person that started this nasty rumor, that they will look down deep and realize how cruel they are and ask for God's forgiveness. I do hope it was just a joke and Emily is ok. My God bless all of them.

Ya know the really crappy part of this whole thing? According to those on the main board who know this woman it wasn't her ex that started the rumor it was her. Evidently she was upset because of being denied for psychological reasons.

Tammy... I really feel for the person(s) who felt this was necessary, for whatever reason...but I feel more so for you, hon. Just remember that YOU are LOVED here and that we all have a close, wonderful kindred spirit that nobody can shake! Pls know that you can always turn to us to vent, to express joy, to ponder, to doubt, etc. I hope you are feeling better, sweetie. Pls don't let this person shake your belief. Love ya babe! (((hugs))) -Karen