Hunger

Hello everyone Just curious, I'm getting closer to my date and I've been trying to come to terms with the fact of how little I will be eating. Each time I take a big huge bite of food im thinking... can I do this? I was wondering for like the first month...were you starving? I'm just so nervous that I wont have that full feeling Its hard to imagine unless you have it done (do you find that to be true?) Everyone keeps telling me "prepare yourself... you better prepare... you better start now" Im thinking to myself... how can I prepare for that when if I eat a tiny bit of food now my stomach wont physically be full. Its not like I can really prepare in that sense. (family pressure) They are like you better start eating that way now... get ready or you wont be able to do it and you will regret it (bad vibes-bad vibes) yatta yatta... im thinking um ok. Then I start to get really nervous because I haven't "prepared" in that sense, I haven't tried to eat that way. Should I be doing that? Should I worry about it like this? aaah! I know inside what the changes are going to be... I know inside that I wont be able to eat the same amount of food. I want this more than anything in the world. My mother keeps telling me that I wont be able to do it, she thinks I will miss food waaaay to much. (i am so mad at food and myself) for how i look now and how i feel ... I'm so ready to say adios. but they have me second guessing myself Any words of advice? Thanks Elizabeth M

I disagree with the advice to prepare yourself for how little you will be eating post op by trying to do it pre -op. If you could do that hon, you would not need this surgery. People are jsut worried about you and therefore feel compelled to point out every little thing abotu your new life that might be hard. I probaly gained 10 lbs before my surgery and I did not even cut back on my diet pepsi addiction. The surgery will take care of restricting you. I can tell you with very small exception, almost no one is hungry during the first month. Some people, never feel "hunger" again. Honestly. I myself do get hungry sometimes when I've gone a long time without eating - but it is a far different kind of hunger - and that is almost impossible for me to try and explain so I'll leave that to someone else. I'm sitting here now eating a minute steak with cheese for lunch, sans the bun and mayo. But here is the craziest thing. I find myself wanting white bread less and less. I am not the poster child for WLS becasue I have experimened with things like *gasp* chocolate or a sliver of cake. However I now, 3 months out don't really feel deprived very often. And when I do -almost always stepping on the scale and seeing my weight loss helps with that. You have made a very personal and difficult decision deciding to have WLS. Don't be suprised if you second guess yourself alot between now and your date - make no mistake, you *are* about to change your life. I for example can no longer drink 12 cans of diet pepsi a day, go back for seconds, eat an entire dinner combo from the chinese take out, I cannot eat 4 slices of pizza, a large piece of cake or half a pan of fresh brownies. HOWEVER.. I can get into my car without adjusting the tilt steering wheel out of my way, I can sit cross legged on my couch, go up stairs without heming & hawing over it - and when I get to the top my blood is not pounding in my head, I can have better sex I can't beleive how much better that is going to get...screw lasagna! I can see a light at the end of a tunnel that was very dark a few months ago. Feelings of doubt are normal. Your family's questions are normal although it may be time to sit them down and explain all of this and let them know that you are not changing your mind and that if they love you, what you need is support and encouragement rather then doubt. Peace & hugs Kathy

Kathy's reply was awesome..great job Kath! I can add that I too thought about getting ready ahead of time. I do feel prepared, however it's not due to eating small bites of food, or not drinking with meals.. it's because I feel I have the knowledge to do what I have to. Each group meeting, each posting question, reinforces what you've learned. You'll continue to add to the information and after a bit, it feels like you've always known it. So, hang in there hon,and do what's right for you. Good luck!

Hi Elizabeth, The others pretty much said it all. I think I have gone through just about every possible scenario to get ready for this. Including trying to eat the small meals and the bites and no drinking etc etc. LOL guess what? it doesn't work. However it DID make me more aware of what I am putting in my mouth. Thankfully I haven't gained any weight since my consult, and I really think that is because I did try all those things and make an effort to become aware what I'm doing. To me being "prepared" means alot of different things. I know we all have an awareness of what to expect. We have been over every possible angle a thousand times in our minds. We have asked others to describe their experiences along the way which even though slightly different is still so important as to not feel blindsided when something comes along. lol I guess if you are anything like me you are in a MEGA state of over analysis. Whoever said ( kathy I think) if we were capable of eating tiny portions and no drinking at wrong times and sucking down soda etc we wouldn't need the procedure, and she is so right. hang in there and we will make it through just fine. One thing I see that is different is we have a really nice support system going..the fact that it is up close and in person and we can actually SEE and hear each other makes all the difference. I read the main board and frankly a good portion of the time it scares me and I can't even imagine entering into this the way some people have chosen to do so, uninformed and basically alone. Ok I have blathered on long enough. basically all I wanted to say in my LONG winded way is that I am right there with you as a pre-op and know how you feel. Your hyper-aware, over analytical pre-op buddy, Linda

Hi Elizabeth, It is difficult to try and understand how you will do with this hunger thing. But for me it wasn't an actual hunger. The first few months you are scared to eat too much and you leanr to understand when you are full. I think the worst thing for me was about 5 days after surgery I had "head hunger" and went into a mild depression. It was the first time I think I realized how much of a friend food was to me. You can't prepare it will have to be an experience after the surgery is done. You will do fine. Don't fret over that! I am now almost 4 months out, down by 73lbs and yes, I do "cheat" once in a great while. I may have a cookie or something small to satisfy my cravings. But also the store carb Busters D'Lite has plenty of sweet items that will help satisfy that cravings and it will be healthier for you. Congratulations on your up coming surgery! I wish you well!! Hope

Elizabeth, Try to stay focused. Try to remain positive. Try not to let the negative enter into your journey. You have obviously done a lot of research and have hopefully read a lot of other people's journals. The support group meetings at PMRI are so informative. The support group post-ops have been so encouraging. I take in everything I can from them. I think it is natural to second guess yourself. But like myself if I could've lost another way I would have. But I was not successful numerous times or with different diets. So this surgery I see as a Tool to help me on my journey to being healthy. I am excited and anxious. My surgery is in 5 days. I am ready. I feel very blessed that I have met so many caring people in my support circle of friends. Glad to see you asking questions. Someone will give you their thoughts and opinions, but just remember it's your journey to a new and healthier Elizabeth. Good luck. Glad to have you onboard. ((HUGS)) Elissa

Elizabeth, Hi and welcome! My mother told me the same kind of things ... she was just very worried about me. She loves you and cares for you and wants to see you happy. Likely in the past, food has made you happy and she saw that. But likely your relationship with food is a love hate relationship. And those kind of relationships are not healthy, and we must do something about it. Which you are doing by taking this step. While food was my comfort for so many years ... and at times I still do mourn it's passing in my life. I am so much healthier is just two short months, both physcially and mentally. I still get knocked down, but I am able to get back up. Something that I could not necessarily do before surgery. I was honestly surprised at just how much I was NOT hungry after surgery. But I still do have those times when the head hunger hits and I have to struggle with that. Then the other day, I had some problems with my older son, and I went straight for the food and made myself sick - that won't be happening again any time soon. I think this surgery is so great ... it allows us an oportuntiy to step back and really start to see the whole situation, why we want to overeat, what feelings we are having at that moment, etc and thus it helps me to control those urges. Before surgery, my vision truly was a little clouded about my eating problem. I simply could not see the whole picture. But now, I could never imagine a desire to go back to the way I was pre-surgery. I love my new life, I love my new eating ... I especially love my new body that does not hurt me like it did pre-op. All this in just 2.5 months. And I am even on a plataue at present, but I still am so very grateful for what I have already been given. BTW - the only thing I did to prepare for surgery was; Prayer Cut out caffeine to help avoid caffenine headaches and cut out sugar to help avoid sugar withdrawls after surgery when my body would already be stressed enough. Lots and lots of reseach Oh and did I mention prayer? Elizabeth, I wish you the very best ... hang in there, and know your mamma just loves you!!! Love her back, but love yourself also! Hugs, Tammy

Elizabeth All good replies, I agree. I hear the same. Since I obviously have been eating too much for a long time, I prepare by trying to not drink with meals and chewing food more than usual and taking smaller bites. Honestly, I believe I eat less by doing those little things. But I agree, and I have faith that the surgery will make it so I do NOT wish to eat more than I need/have to. Fingers crossed. Welcome aboard. Dianne

Thanks soooo much everyone. It really meant alot to me to read all the replies. You are all such a blessing to me. It was the extra support I needed to realize that I am preparing for this. It has been almost a year that I have mentally prepared, I am ready to give up all that food. In fact I just dont enjoy eating anymore. I am ready to start with small Healthy portions of food. I am ready for the energy after I loose my first 20 pounds. I know what its like to be without food for 2 weeks because I had my tonsils out a year ago and boy oh boy! never had so much pain...but I found out what it was like to go for 2 weeks without food and even drink pretty much. I was very hungry then but then I did not have a smaller stomach and even after awhile the hunger started to subside. I think I am letting my family get to me. I will have to reasure them although every time I do they dont buy it. I suppose that after I have the surgery and God willing get through it and start loosing and stay healthy they will start to understand that it is best for me at this time in my life where my health is starting to go downhill. Thank you all so much for the support it just means so much to me Elissa good luck with your journey congrats!!! jan 26th was my birthday Thanks again everyone