Friends are scaring me!!!!!!!!

So far this week I have had three friends tell me horror stories about gastric bypass surgery. Two explained how their friends had bowel obstructions. One explained how her friends hair fell out, and her other friend died from anorexia after the surgery because she became obsessed with her weight. Of course now I have the "should I go thru with this blues"

Hi Debbie, I guess your friends have your best interest at heart...maybe. I think it's perfectly natural for us to get scared and second guess ourselves as the time gets closer and surgery and all that goes with it becomes more real. I think maybe you should ask yourself some questions. 1. Is it at all possible these friends could have an ulterior motive? Are they fat? Are they secretly maybe a bit jealous that you will become thinner...or maybe take some attention and spotlight away from them? 2. Do you have confidence in your doctors and feel you and they have prepared yourself as well as you possibly can for any outcome, no matter what it may be? 3. Do you have other support of family and friends behind you and supporting you in your decision? 4. Do you truely feel that the quality of your life will be as good without the surgery? Are you aware of the definite outcome of your health should you choose not to do this? 5. Do you really see yourself attempting weigh****chers or some other similar diet on your own and having any sort of lasting result? Only you can say what's best for you, only you know what you can and can't live with. Should you decide to have the surgery you have a site full of people supporting you and helping each other along the way...should you choose not to have the surgery guess what? You still have that same site full of people supporting you and helping you along the way. Please take care, Linda

the people who know the least about wls are always the ones that speak the loudest. it's almost like urban myths. ohhhhhh i know a friend of a friend who had.....hahaa but by they time they hear the story it's all messed up. yes alot of people loose some hair but that is normal with almost ANY surgery because of the drugs used during surgery. your not going to go bald haha it's not like that at all. the best thing you can do is to do all the research you can on wls. this is a great site to do that because you are hearing from real people. decide weather or not to have the surgery using REAL FACT NOT RUMORS that you don't even know are correct and from people who don't know the first thing about wls.

You need to make a decision with regards to friendly information. This is a serious operation. My way of coping with it was to balance what might have happened if I didn't have the surgery. Diabetes, heart attack, who knows... But right now I feel great and every day I wake up I love the alternative. I was already losing my hair (affect of yo-yo dieting). I can also send you plenty of horror stories of what has happened to obese people who have not had the operation.

Debbie: Ditto to all the responses so far... L.B.'s is very moving. There are always going to be people who see the glass as half empty. Surely you've made an informed decision without their input. Just take the info for what it's worth and smile and nod, but follow you're own heart and mind.

Oh, my little angelette....!! I feel as if I'm not doing my appropiate angel duties!!! Debbie, pls remember that you have made a very informed and wise decision... You've done all your research and you've completed all your testing. You are the only one who decides what is best for you, hon. There are horror stories out there for ANYTHING! And like Fran said, plenty of urban myths, too. While you are waiting, pls surround yourself with POSITIVE people and with people who know what you're going through and will go through. Look at the before and after pics... Imagine yourself there is just a few short months. Again, while only YOU can make that ultimate decision, but if you are feeling anxious, you can reinforce your reasons with all the studies as to why you are doing this and how it's going to change your quality of life. Pls remember that we are all here for you...we understand!! And like Linda said, we will STILL all be here for you, whatever decision you make, hon. (((hugs))) -Karen