Hi, I'm new here & have TONS of questions. (small novella inside)

Hi everyone: I've been lurking her for almost 2 months now. Finally, after having spoken to a person about her experience and finding a good referal for a doctor, I'm starting my journey to a healthier me. In a nutshell, my history with weightloss goes something like this...... Was the "chubby" kid all the way until highschool and then became the "fat girl". Always popular but not the girl you ever wanted to date(doesn't look good to bring a 185lb girl to the senior prom). My 1st year in college I had to walk 15 blocks to school each way and went from a size 22 to a size 12 in 3 months. Kept that off until I got my own aparment and ramen noodels and poptarts were my best friends. Got married in 1992 in a size 32 wedding dress. Lost and gained countless pounds (and a husband) in the next 10 years. Ended a relationship in 1992 and decided to get really tough with my weight. I lost 80 lbs by working out 2 1/2 hours a day and eating only veggies, fruit, chicken and one McDonalds meal per week. Got down to 194lbs, met the love of my life and proceded to gain the weight back on with a vengance. I'm sure it's all related to the "I'm not worthy to have someone wonderful love me this way so lets just see how self distructive we can become" sort of thinking. Anyway, the love of my life and I married in October and I got pregant on my honeymoon. I gave birth in June to the most beautiful gift from God. I was 39 at the time and went through 27 hours of natural labor to get this miracle from God...but she's here and I couldn't be happier. Well, that's a lie. I could be happier if this gosh darn weight wasn't such a HUGE factor in my life. So, here I am today. I just called Dr. Barba's office and was told I need to go to the information session on Jan 12th..then take it from there. So, there it is. I have no clue what I weight because I'm so scared to step on the scale and see the number without a "plan of attack" in place. Somehow I think that if I see something close to 300 ,without some kind of light at the end of the tunnel, I will just die. I guess I should get to my questions before you all go into a over-word-usage coma huh? 1. My company is self insured. Although I would like the Lapband, they will not approve. The closest thing they would approve is VBG. Can someone tell me anything about this surgery in terms of post op recovery time and any bad side effects. 2. Is it smart to get this done when I have a 6 month old to chace after? Will I be able to pick her up after surgery? If not, did anyone have this issue and how did you handle it? 3. I only have a few medical issues because of my weight. It it hard to get a Dr. to perform the surgery if you aren't a "walking case study". I have severe chronic psoriasis and knee/joint pain and very hight cholesterol. I would think that's enough due to my family history. Everyone on my mom and dads side have died of heart attacks by the time they were 60. My mom and dad are 72 & 80....and the exceptions in the family. I will say that I know someone who had the full bypass and she throws up CONSTANTLY. She also apprears to eat more than she should but I really can't say. Is throwing up just part of the deal? If it is, I'm not sure this is the option for me. All I know is that I want to run and play with my baby girl. I want to go on amusement rides with her. I don't want her teased about having a fat mommy when I stand with her at the bus stop. I want to teach her to love life and love it as a healthy, vibrant girl who isn't addicted to food. I want her to see a healthy mommy. I want to BE her healthy mommy. I'm DONE with being the biggest one in the room, I'm DONE with pulling at my clothes so they don't cling to the rolls. I'm DONE with being a sexy, vibrant, beautiful woman in a body that acts like a prison. I want to live a life like a "normal" person. I know that word is probably up for interpretation but what I mean is that I want to go where other people go. Do things other people do. I want to live on the inside of the circle. I'm DONE living on the outside looking in at the living......I want to do the living for a change. Thanks for listening to me and putting up with my horrible spelling. Any information/tips would be so greatly appreciated. Gina B.

Hi Gina, and welcome!!! I'm new around here too... but let me tell you this place is awesome! Everyone has so many great things to say -- advice, encouragement, inspiration, etc etc. Everything you said was so well-put. I understand where you're coming from 110%! Especially the last part about wanting to DO the living instead of watching... you hit my life story to a "T". I was always the "fat" girl in school. Like you, I was very well liked, just not one that people would want to date. And I too, have a divorce under my belt... and a small child! Anyways... don't be shy to ask questions, most the people around here are very well informed and are wonderful sources of information and encouragement. --CJ

HELLO GINA, WELCOME! I HAD MY SURGERY WITH DR BARBA ALMOST SEVEN MONTHS AGO. I HAD RESIGNED MYSELF TO LIVE A FAT LIFE. I ALWAYS HAD A WEIGHT PROBLEM AND DEVELOPING SLEEP APNEA WAS MY WAKE UP CALL. I WANTED TO SEE MY BOYS GROW UP AND EVERY NIGHT WHEN I WENT TO SLEEP I DID'NT KNOW IF I WAS GOING TO WAKE UP. IT WAS NOT AND IS NOT AN EASY CHOICE, BUT SO WORTH WHILE. IF I HAD TO DO IT OVER AGAIN I WOULD COMPLICATIONS AND ALL. FOR ME HEAD HUNGER WAS THE WORST TO OVERCOME. MY NEXT HURDLE WAS PEOPLES COMMENTS. WHEN I START TO LOSE WEIGHT PEOPLE WOULD ASK "WHAT IS WRONG ? YOU ARE LOSING SO MUCH WEIGHT! ISN'T THAT SOMETHING WHEN YOU ARE FAT PEOPLE ARE "WOW YOUR FAT" AND WHEN YOUR LOSE WEIGHT THEY ACT SUSPICIOUS. YOU HAVE TO MEASURE THE PROS AND CONS AND GET ALL THE FACTS ABOUT THE SURGERY THEN MAKE YOUR DECISION. ONCE YOU HAVE IT DONE THERE IS NO TURNING BACK. ANY SPECIFIC Q'S EMAIL ME. YOU PICKED AN EXCELLENT DR BLESSINGS SPLENDALICIOUS

Quote"All I know is that I want to run and play with my baby girl. I want to go on amusement rides with her. I don't want her teased about having a fat mommy when I stand with her at the bus stop. I want to teach her to love life and love it as a healthy, vibrant girl who isn't addicted to food. I want her to see a healthy mommy. I want to BE her healthy mommy. I'm DONE with being the biggest one in the room, I'm DONE with pulling at my clothes so they don't cling to the rolls. I'm DONE with being a sexy, vibrant, beautiful woman in a body that acts like a prison. I want to live a life like a "normal" person. I know that word is probably up for interpretation but what I mean is that I want to go where other people go. Do things other people do. I want to live on the inside of the circle. I'm DONE living on the outside looking in at the living......I want to do the living for a change. Quote" Hi Gina, Looks like you've answered your own question. Good luck and welcome to the family!!

Welcome to the board Gina. I did not have a host of medical problems before surgery and I personally believe that you are better off if you don't. The surgery however, will prevent you from getting the health problems that will come if you remain obese. I had my RNY surgery done laproscopically by Dr. Robert Bell out of Yale New Haven and he was absolutely wonderful. I was up and walking around the same day and could have been back to work in two weeks but chose to stay out a third week while I was being weaned back on food. You will not be able to lift anything over three pounds for two weeks following surgery but you could change diapers and stuff on the floor without a problem. You may just need help with lifting your bundle to the crib. I have also had no problems with throwing up or dumping syndrome so to speak. I do avoid sugar but nothing else seems to bother me at all so honestly, this has been the best thing I've ever done for myself. My first suggestion would to be to see your doctor for a physical and while your there, ask him for a letter recommending you for surgery. If your OBGYN will give you a letter, get one from him/her too. You will also need to get a psych evaluation and schedule a nutritionist appointment. I first called Dr. Bell's office and they mailed out a packet of information with a ton of forms to fill out including my diet history. I also had to get two doctor letters, the psych evaluation and nutritionist forms all together and fax them all in to Dr. Bell. Once they had my info, they did all the legwork with insurance and within two weeks scheduled me for a group session with about twenty other patients that would have surgery with in the next two following months. So because I had gotten all the doctor appointments, letters and forms in right away, I was scheduled in about 2 1/2 months from the time I started. I had my surgery on July 25th and am down 65 pounds and have gone from a size 22W to a 14! Oh, and because I had the surgery done laproscopically, I only have 6 very tiny incision scars going across my belly just above the belly button. Dr. Bell has the most experience and skill in the laproscopic procedure and that is why I chose him as my surgeon. I feel he was worth the extra half hour drive south of Hartford. That's my personal opinion and experience though and you will probably get many others here. I lot of people love Dr. Arranow but he's an "open" surgery doc and I did not want the "open" surgery due to the large scar factor and more risk of complications such as hernia's. Geez...hope this isn't tooo much info for you. I do wish you the best though. Keep us updated on how things are going for you. ~Sue 262/197....hoping for 145