Down in the dumps.

Dr Aranow told me that I'd run a gammut of emotions after this surgery, and boy was he right! I've just been feeling kind of "stuck" and down in the dumps for no reason at all. I'm still on puree stage and will be one month out tomorrow. I do see him tomorrow for my check up. I've not been able to get to a support group meeting because I don't like driving the hour by myself when I'm still feeling tired and weak. I suffer from bad panic attacks and I'm afraid I'll have some while driving up there when I'm this out of sorts. My body is rebelling too. My right side of my body, that is. Yesterday, my right shoulder and upper back went out and I couldn't move or turn...today, my right hip/sacral nerve is out. I'm not hungry and I'm eating well...getting in my vitamins, all my protein and lots of liquids. I'm not really having "head hunger" except when I see an ad for pizza on tv! So, I guess I'll just ride this out and see what happens. I have noticed that I'm very quiet around the house too. Not that much into conversation w/ hubby or kids...just kind of withdrawn. I'm low on patience too. Snapping at the kids and not tolerating their antics as I did prior to surgery. Why, when we have our guts dissected and put back together, do our emotions and feelings take a toll too? It's so weird. Am I in a grief process for the "old" way/ways? I'm not feeling sorry for myself for the old stomach/way of eating. I'm glad I did this...I just can't pin point what's going on. Any input and response will be greatly appreciated... Thanks for reading. paula

Hey Paula, I know how your feeling, I am going through this also. I am having ups and downs with my emotions since I have lost my weight and now being stuck at this weight for the past couple of months. Its scary. I am happy, then sad, then scared, its a rollercoaster for me too. I have been told its normal and it will get better. Just take it day by day and just come to us for support when you need it, it helps to talk to our OH family here on the board. Everyone is so wonderful and understanding. I am here for you too. Whenever you need a shoulder or just to chat. Hugs KimC

Hey Paula, You are an inspiration to me and this stage will pass. Any surgery has an impact on our bodies both physically and mentally. Add to that an entirely new way of life and we are completely out of our comfort zone. You have given me so much great advice..and I am pulling for you. I also have aniexty in certain situations..so I know how that feels. I would be glad to go to a meeting with you and I will drive. Just say the word.....keep on doing what you are doing and you will prevale. You are a strong woman with great advice...)) So if you want to go to a meeting let me know..I will pick you up..we aren't far from each other..You are in my thoughts, Paula. Colleen

Hi Paula, First let me say....you are not alone. I found that the emotional part of the surgery was WAY harder to recover from than the physical. Physically, I thought it was a breeze to recovery. Mentally, it's HARD. You are used to a certain way of life, and dealing with emotions with food is one of them. When you take that away, it's almost as if you are going through drug withdrawals (at least it was for me). You have to find a WHOLE new way of dealing with happiness, anger, sadness, etc. If you used food, you have to find a replacement. And finding that replacement takes time. It does get better, that I can guarantee. But I remember feeling like you and riding it out is hard. Just keep posting here, and emailing your friends and supporters. Every day, it will get a little better. Love, Tammy

Paula, Ditto on all the great advise that has been given - we are here for you! Phyllis

Hey Paula, Sorry to hear your feeling down. Had the same feelings early out and they still crop up from time to time. It's good to just vent them out. Share them with your family and friends. It really helps just to get it out. Know we are all here to listen and do our best to help out. Take Care, Julio

I went to the Elina/Kim presentation in September and as I listened to Kim describe the post-op emotions, I thought "My God- this sounds JUST like the post-partum depression I have dealt with!!" After my second child (born 11 months after the first) I had a really hard time, and after the third Iwas okay- with Prozac and then the 4th one 18 months after the third one, really sent me over the edge- Paxil pulled me back and brought me the stabalization I needed....and an extra 50 pounds on what already was an extra 100 ....ANYHOW my point is, your body is going through a tremendous physical, psychological and physiological change right now. OF COURSE you are going to have emotions up down and all around, of course you are going to have the blues at times....you wouldn't be normal if you felt happy all the time, you'd be a Stepford wife....Aranow did a gastric bypass NOT a lobotomy Paula!!!!! The important thing is to recognize when you need to do something about it- like make an appointment with Kim or Dr Wirth, like get to support groups (on here if not in Middletown) Maybe there is a more local support group? MAYBE you could email me- if you like- I am mid-way between you and Middlesex- where in RI are you???? Then there is the CRAPPY weather- who wouldn't feel depressed in this???? Criminy!!!! What drugs you take for your anxiety/panic??? I have a psych background in my nursing, I can give you a few pointers on that too....Email me Paula if you want....and stop watching Pizza commercials. you can't puree pizza the mozzerella gets all clumpy......

Hey Paula, I can add what the others have said as I have had this happen to me also. I truly believe I was grieving the loss of food as my reliable companion. Food was ALWAYS there for me and I KILLED it! I suddenly realized that I could no longer just go off the diet and binge my way through the bad feelings. This was permanent. It really had a psychological affect on me for a while. I am still learning how to deal with my emotions in more healthy ways than before. I can say also, that being on that darned pureed diet is enough to depress anyone! When you finally get to eat solid foods it will make life so much better, I promise you that. In the meantime, maybe you can find a support group closer to where you live. It is so helpful to share these ideas and feelings with those who have been through the same thing. Anyone know of any support groups in Paula's neck of the woods? Hang in there Paula, you will look back on this as a dull memory in a few months. I have to really think back at how discouraging it was to be in those beginning stages. Now that I am here, I can say that it was so very worth it. big HUGS terri

Paula, I just saw that you are in RI. There are pretty good WLS meetings at L&M hospital in New London CT about once a month. Beth F. can tell you when the next one is if you are interested. It may still be a little bit of a ride, but closer than an hour. terri