Where is Peter? I need a good joke!

I just got back from teaching 85 six year olds about fitness. I'm POOPED! Peter, do you have a good joke for us all!?? I pulled this one from another message board: Please, I hope it is not insulting in any way. It caught my funny bone. A woman's prayer Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep One who's handsome, smart and strong One who loves to listen long One who thinks before he speaks One who'll call, not wait for weeks I pray he's gainfully employed So when I spend his cash, he won't be annoyed Pulls out my chair, opens my door Massages my back and asks to do more Oh send me a man who will make love to my mind Knows the answer to, "How big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end And always be my very best friend Amen A man's prayer I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a liquor store and a bass boat. This doesn't rhyme and I don't give a cr@p. Amen

How about a stupid one instead?? The Rabbit Miracle A man was driving along the highway, and saw a rabbit hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the rabbit, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of the car and wa**** The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit was dead. The driver felt so awful, he began to cry. A woman driving down the highway saw the man crying on the side of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was wrong. "I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it." The woman told the man not to worry. She knew what to do. She went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp, dead rabbit, and sprayed the contents of the can onto the rabbit. Miraculously the rabbit came to life, jumped up, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped down the road. 50 yards away the rabbit stopped, turned around, waved and hopped down the road, another 50 yards, turned, waved and hopped another 50 yards. The man was astonished. He couldn't figure out what substance could be in the woman's spray can!! He ran over to the woman and asked, "What is in your spray can? What did you spray on that rabbit?" The woman turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said: "Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."

Not only is that not offensive but its just too funny. Or maybe I just have had too long of a day and anything will be funny to me at this point. Yikes! Thank goodness this is the last day I have to work this week. Thanks for the jokes guys!

85 six year olds? was it at P&R? If so my son may have been in the group!

Hey there! It was with Parks & Rec, so I'll bet I saw your son!! I hope he had a good time, I'd hate to embarass you guys! ;) What a small world!

By the way Tammy, Your new picture is ........I'm speachless....It's sexy, gorgeous, beautiful, AMAZING, OMG.........You are ......beyond words... WOW!!!!!!

Dorota, You are too kind. Thanks for the compliment. Hope you have a great weekend! Love, Tammy

Good Morning! Have lots of plans this weekend.. starting out with making a BIG birthday breakfast for my mom.... omelets with fresh basil and lowfat provalone cheese, turkey bacon, and her favorite, apple pancakes.... Big change from the old bacon and homefries and sausage...... then going to the mall shopping with my 16 year old, then my mom wants to go outlet shopping in westbrook, i'm excited.... That's just today..... In the afternoon hubby and I are meeting up at the gym... Big plans for you today? Congrats on the new job BTW

Not too much going on. I'm teaching step aerobics at 8, then I have a Jack and Jill bachelor's party at 2. Nothing else planned which is highly unusual. We just got our central air fixed, so I suspect we'll be staying in catching up on movies!

When I read this the first time..I thought it said "85 year olds"...LOL! I thought "OK...I thought she said she was going to be working with kids"...2 hours later and looked at it again...where is my head? Did that make you laugh? I have like a 1000 jokes on my email address at home...if I find a good one...I will add it! Love your joke by the way! Nancy