6 weeks postop major depression

I am 6 weeks postop, have had a plateau for 3 of these last weeks. I have not budged in weight loss. as stated earlier, have been working my tail off working out at the gym, doing it all right. gotten the pep talk from all of you how plateaus are normal. but now Ive fallen into a major depression over it. Im near tears all the time. Im not the kind of person that gets depressed. im always so up. but its really dogging me. i feel like something is wrong with me. i know you all say its ok, it will pass. but i cant help but feel like this is all there is, like im different and im never going to loose anymore weight, or that something is really wrong and i will have to go in for more surgery. I has been one thing after another after my surgery. so many OTHER complications that were not related to the surgery, but just have kept me down. mostly female problems. right now Im battling a vaginal/rectal bacterial infection, called beta-strep. Last week it was a cyst in my innerparts the size of a mac truck that I had to have lanced, the pain of which was worse than having gb surgery. I kid you not. During all of this, I start the exercise program and bust my hump, my body hurts from all the working out 3 times a week. and on top of it I have a wicked cold. If I could just loose a few pounds it would do so much for my mood, but NOTHING! ZIP! UP AND DOWN I GO ON THAT DAMN SCALE. Its just so disappointing and worrisome. Have any of you ever known anyone that just never lost the weight. they lost some and then nothing. could there be something wrong. do i have a leak maybe. food getting into the old part of the stomach. you say my body is in shock, but come on. how can it not loose weight, im not eating anything, am i this insulin resistant. give me a break. i want to just cry, or die either one. this is not how i envisioned all this. im so upset. L

One more thing, I see Dr. Bell tomorrow. He wanted me down to 220 by then, and Im not going to make it. Im 10lbs over. I want to cry. I just dont know whats wrong with me. Im so upset.

Lauren, I know it's hard, I've been through it as I have posted. You will lose more, your body needs to catch up. I know. And yes, you get very depressed. I did not have all the other problems, but I understand the need for the scale to move. Stop getting on it. I know it's hard, and it's hard not to compare, but things will happen. It helps to prove to yourself that you're doing things right. Log your food daily. Keep track of calories, protein and carbs. Get daily exercise. Count your water. If you really know that you are doing things right, you will have more peace with yourself and then you will be able to know that it WILL come off. Talk to Dr. Bell. He is very understanding. Please e-mail me if you need to talk. I've been through the exact same thing with weight loss. Keep reading and posting, it helps. Pam

Lauren, I emailed you privately at home email address. You are in my prayers Hugs Kathy K

Lauren, my dear listen to me. I have my surgery January 3rd and look at my weight chart. If you look at the chart from January 30th to March 5 I only lost 7 pounds in which 5 of them were last week. So in the whole month of February I lost 2 pounds, and believe me those two pounds kept coming on and off every day. I thought I was doing something wrong and my dear friends from OH told me I was not. When I spoke to Dr. Duffy he told me that my body had to get used to losing weight and that this will happen. So trust me my dear you are not doing nothing wrong at all. I am pretty sure that your intake is so limited right now, because mine still is. So trust me the weight will come off soon. You can not compare yourself to other people because everyone is different. If you want to talk call me.... Date Lost Total Lost October 21st 261 0 0 December 21st 256 -5 5 January 3rd (Surgery)259 +3 2 January 8th 249 -10 12 January 10th 245 -4 16 January 18th 239 -6 22 January 30th 230 -9 31 February 17th 229 -1 32 February 26th 228 -1 33 March 5th 223 -5 38

Hi Lauren, No you're not the only person WLS isn't going to work for, because I was SURE that I was going to be that person. And (surprise) -- it didn't happen and I lost like everyone else does. You just need to relax a little bit. Don't kill yourself with the exercise routine, just do enough to make it a comfortable part of your new life. Don't worry about the scale. Repeat after me: don't worry about the scale! You've just begun a journey that's going to take 12-18 months -- and believe me, it's far from all downhill. Something to think about: some of us used food as a way to protect ourselves from feeling sad/scared/depressed etc. Then without the ability to eat-eat-eat, there we were feeling things we weren't used to dealing with. Are you going to support group meetings? Have you seen a counselor or been evaluated for possible clinical depression? There's no shame in using Prozac or Wellbutrin or other dr-prescribed medications to help us deal with it. When I went back to my dr to renew my Prozac prescription it made all the difference in the world to me. Keep the faith, keep in touch with us on the boards and I'm sure you will do just fine -- no, just GREAT -- with your new tool. Best, Donna

Lauren, You are not alone. Like I told you before you have to give your body time to heal. You have been through so much these past weeks, you feelings are all in a tizzy right now. If your not on an antidepressent, you should talk to your doctor about maybe going on a low dose, its nothing to be ashamed of. I have been on them since my teens. I know your feeling like a failure right now, but I promise you this, you will succeed honey. You have to give your self time, its still early in the game, you have a lifetime to do better. Keep your chin up and try to be positive, you have a wonderful family lean on them for support, or lean on all of us for support. We are all in your corner, we love you and support you and will be here for you no matter what. Take care of yourself and don't let it overwhelm you, your better than that. Hugs KimC

Lauren, Your post hit very close to home. I too have had three weeks with zippo nada not a single pound loss despite my many efforts. I too have battled a number of unrelated medical issues... on my third round of antiobiotics in one months time. Aunt Flo has reared her ugly head and I can't seem to get out of my own way. I also feel the recent weather has played it's ugly hand in my disposition. It has to be partly the time of year. I recommend keeping the faith as with all things this too shall pass. I think we all need to keep marching forward and let the past be the past. Tomorrow is another day and perhaps the scales will show us our efforts have been worthwhile and if not tomorrow perhaps the week after. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Be strong, stick with it and success will come your way. Lise

Hi Lauren, I am really sorry about what you are going through. All of that at once and no wonder you feel depressed! That really sucks. I would feel depressed too. I know what you mean, if the scale would just move, the other stuff wouldn't seem so bad. It will move again, but I was thinking, maybe it could be, besides the usual plateau we all hit around that time, maybe the medications you are taking for these other things. Maybe they could be causing you to retain water. Or maybe, you are not eating enough, which could also stall the weight loss. Rest assured, you are far from done losing weight. It will start again. As far as the depression, I really like what Donna said, because it was true for me. I went to Overeaters Anonymous a couple years ago, and I went for a couple of years,(plus I have been in AA since 1983) and I learned some things about myself, and my eating. I totally used food to fill up an emptiness I felt inside me. Even though I am happily married, etc, I have issues with my self-esteem, like never feeling good enough. I looked to food to ease my discontent when I couldn't get a "good" feeling from someone/somewhere else. When I went to OA, I stopped eating sugar and stopped eating between meals - I went through a depression, and mood swings too. I didn't have my buddy (food) anymore to take away the bored feeling, or the sad feeling, or the angry feeling...It took a while to learn to get "good feelings" from inside myself, not from outside things or people. (food included). I'm not saying this is what you are going through, I am just saying that is what happened to me. I used food to feel better and had adjustments to make inside my head when I stopped overeating. I felt this awful anxious feeling, which I do still get on rare occasions. Anyway, I am praying this will pass for you soon, you are a lovely woman and you deserve to be happy. Try not to give up, ok? Anne

(((Lauren))) Please be sure to speak to Dr. Bell about how you're feeling. Yes, you're right it's natural, and normal to go through this. However, somehow it's not always a comfort to know that when you're in the middle of it. Isn't that right? First off- I would REALLY prefer you concentrate on your health right now rather than a number on the scale. If you ca, have someone take the scale away for a little while. You need to honor the major change you've made to your body with rest, papmering and TLC. Also- you need to give yourself the extra TLC you need right now to get over you other medical issues. Don't consider your exercise time work- consider it ME time and then treat yourself with other things that make you happy (not food related) The weight loss WILL come. But, your body is in major upheval right now. Try to keep in perspective that 'this too shall pass'- deep breaths, extra rest, loose the scale and papmer yourself a little. take care of yourself in stead of beating yourself up. love & hugs to you, Lisa