better days ahead (I hope)

After thinking I was all set, scheduled for my hernia repair and TT this coming Tuesday, I found out yesterday the insurance company won't cover my tummy tuck because "I don't have a rash" and "you have to be 18 months out from original Gastric Bypass and I am only 15 months" Well, this plastic surgeon didn't even try to argue it. He just said those are the insurance company rules. The plastic surgeon says, oh just do the hernia now and then in 3 months we'll do the TT. I said you know, I am petrified of this surgery now and I can't see myself facing yet another surgery in 3 months!!! Plus the time from work so on and so forth. By this time I was having a complete meltdown. I couldn't talk to my husband because he was in this company golf tournament all day. So I went home and called my WLS surgeon Dr Giles. He had just gotten out of surgery but I just poured my heart out to him and I could tell he wasn't very pleased with how this was handled. Well, he said if you and Rob can afford to pay up front then we will appeal this to death and get your money back, but you are right, you can't go through another surgery in 3 months. Finally, Rob comes home (sorry I am rambling) and I was a blubbering mess by that time. He sat down, held me and said, don't you worry, I am going to pay for this, you are going to be fine and we will get through it together. I cried even harder, because God help me, I love this man. The fact he didn't even blink an eye to say I'll do this for you made me realize how much he loves me. I've held back from him for so long and not let him into my heart and now here he is, standing by me. I am an emotional basket case right now, but he made me feel strong and I just can't describe what that meant to me. (I'm rambling again). So, Dr. Giles is calling the plastic guy over the weekend and telling him we are going through with this and we are on for Tuesday morning!! He said he would do everything he can to help me with an appeal. The reason I don't have a rash is because I use a cream, AND the reason I am doing this at 15 months is because of the serious nature of my hernia!!! But even so, we have to first pay the $4,800.00 (that's a 20% discount they are giving me which I lose if there are any complications from the plastic surgery) up front and then the doctor's fee is another $1800. and then the anesthesia is $700. Hopefully we will win this appeal and get the money back. I can't get over how expensive this has all become. I guess the point of sharing this with all of you is, document everything you can, take pictures of rashs or anything else that will back up your "medical necessity". I didn't. They told me it would be no problem and I foolishly believed them. (the ins. co) Also, I am not going for the TT just for the vanity of it, it is so much more because the loose skin hurts and well, any of you that have it knows what I mean. And the other thing I learned from this is I have one heck of a supportive DH. I have doubted that in the past, but now I feel like something lost has been found again. I have also gotten so much support from people on the CT board. You are su*****redible people and I am so sorry I will miss the get together. Linda, please have a cheesecake on me! I feel so blessed to have you all on my side. Geez, am I an emotional wreck or what? So I have a date Tuesday morning with 2 surgeons, please remember me in your prayers, and I will have my angel Sharon update as soon as she can. HUGE hugs to all! Cheryl

Cheryl, You have been on my mind all day today. I almost called you last night but it was supper time and I didn't want to disturb you and then this morning I was up bright and early and going to call again but got way laid. I don't know what to say to you other than my heart is filled with awe. You are such a trooper and your DH is just outstanding. There is a jewish word that I don't know if you are familiar with but he is truly a "mensch" The is the highest of compliments. I just know that you will be fine and maybe even be able to laugh about this in retrospect. You are one special lady and I have half a mind to go marching into that plastic surgeon's office and giving him a piece of my mind.....lol: only there isn't much of it left!! You will be fine and you are already beautiful, and once this is over you will be more comfortable in your new body. Please don't ever hesitate to come here and ramble or call me!! Love you Linda

I can't even express how much it means to me to have you as my friend Linda. And your right, I am just so looking forward to feeling more comfortable in my own body. I guess this hernia is in such an emergency situation, it could strangulate my intestine any time. So I have to be very careful and I am really antsy. So when they say no medical necessity I just want to scream! I am grateful for your friendship love Cheryl

Cheryl, I'll keep you in my prayers. Be thankful that your surgeon is so supportive and on your side, but most importantly cherrish the love and support from your husband. Sometimes it's hard to see or we forget what's on their plate, too. But you're lucky you've got eachother to get YOU through this. The $$$ stuff will work out somehow, but tonight go to bed remembering the uplifting feeling you had today in his arms. Positive thoughts! Dee

Dear Cheryl, Better days are ahead!!! I was so upset and in tears when I read your post. These insurance people sit behind their desks and think nothing of playing with people's lives and sanity. It's so awful. I'm so sorry you are having such a tough time but it will work out for the best. As far as your husband, he's a keeper big time. Give him a big hug from all of us. You are in my prayers and if you need anything at all just holler. Big hugs to you, Mary Lou

Cheryl, I believe that all things work together for good and for a reason. The fact that you've experienced a renewal in your relationship with your husband is wonderful, and worth every bit of distress along the way. I know that sounds like I'm insensitive to your ordeal, but I'm not. I truly understand what you must have been going through and how difficult it was for you. It would have made me flip out too! But the fact that you were able to see how much he cares for you, really does make it worthwhile and puts everything in perspective. I'm confident that your appeals will go through and that everything will work out in the end. I'll be praying for you and for the surgery. You are a wonderful lady and deserve wonderful things - and I look forward to hearing how happy you are after the surgery, how wonderful your new hour-glass shape makes you feel, and how much better you feel without that pesky hernia. Best wishes to you. God Bless, Kathy Bilodeau

Cheryl, I'm sorry you had such a hard day with all of this. It must have been awful with no one to talk to. It's great to hear that your surgeon is so supportive and even better to hear that your hubby was equally so. Best wishes on Tuesday, and you will be in my thoughts and prayers. Maggie

Hi Cheryl, I was more happy to hear that your hubby supports you and will stick this together....I do understand about your feeling about surgery. Insurance company are pain in b___!!!! I will keep you in my prayer and will thinking of you on tuesday. You are special person to all of us. Hugs Kathy

Hi Cheryl, Everyone pretty much said it all. It is nice to have those revelations about our husbands every now and then. He sounds really wonderful. I am sorry about the hard time you are getting, especially at the last minute, but it will all work out in the end. You take care of yourself first, and everything else will fall into place. Good luck on Tuesday, we'll all be thinking of you. Anne

Cheryl: You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I am sure in the end everything will work out. A good thing did come out of this mess though. You were shown just how much love and faith your DH has in you. That was just awesome how he handled the whole situation. You have a keeper in him. Enjoy the rest of the weekend. Chryssie