Unrealistic?

This past weekend I was out shopping with a friend of mine who wears a large. I was looking on the "regular" sized side of Fashion Bug with her and was drooling over some cute shirts that were an X-Large.. I thought I was being modest by not looking at a smaller size. Anyhow.. she said "you may not get down to that size" as in, I should be more realistic, because this surgery isn't a magical cure... this I know. Although.. is it unrealistic to think that after I've lost my weight (a year or so down the road) that I'd go from a 26/28/30 to an XLarge? I have no idea when I'd be able to fit in that either or how much I'd have to lose. I guess the shirt just seemed small and she didn't think that I'd be able to fit in it, ever. After seeing the woman on the Discovery Health Channel (who wasn't in an XL), she didn't think this surgery could do it for me. What do you guys think? I'm starting out at 348 at 5'6".. do I have a chance at a size other than "plus"? Will I always have to shop in the Plus Size section? Thanks for your thoughts.

Of course you have a chance to be out of plus sizes!! This site is filled with women who started out in your weight range & are in regular sized clothing now. People sometimes just say things without thinking & don't realize they're being hurtful. I started out at 252 and 5'2" six months ago. I was a 20 on top, 22 on the bottom. I'm now a 12 or 14 or Medium/Large on top & starting to squeeze in to regular size 14 pants (no more plus sizes!!), and it's only been 6 months and I'm not a fast loser! Sooooo, before you know it you'll be making the slide to the smaller end of the plus sizes, and one day you'll be staying on the other side of the Fashion Bug ... hopefully buying a shirt in a smaller size than the girl who made the comment to you!! Good luck!! Kathy F.

Michelle, Tell your friend to get over herself!!! You will be wearing an XL or smaller. I am 5'3 and I started at 291. I have lost 80 pounds in 6 months and I am already wearing XL's. Of course it depends on the cut and the make but I am teetering on the edge of women's 16s and XL's. I don't know about you but I plan to lose another 80 pounds before I am done. . So get your self in gear, exercise, eat right and you will be a shopping fool like me...... Linda

Michelle: Anything is possible with this surgery. It all depends on the person. I plan on loosing 100 lbs. I am now 225 and 5'3". I plan on taking full advantage of this new tool. I am sure if you work at it you will loose all the weight you feel you need to. It won't be easy for either of us but we got to this point so we are half way there. Don't let people get you down. You are great as you want to be. Best of luck to you. Chryssie

Michelle, i had my surgery 6 weeks ago today. At this point I've lost 40 pounds. I started at 276 and i'm 5' 7", i was wearing 26's that were to tight. Today I am wearing a shirt my daughter (another michelle) bought me for mothers day...it is a size (DRUM ROLL PLEASE) 14/16!!!!!!!!! Granted it was bought at the Avenue BUT its fitted AND I cried in the dressing room when I tried it on and it FIT. Yes virginia there is a santa claus. AND YES Michelle you will be wearing those smaller sizes. Again like the others have said - eat right excersize and do everything that the doctor says. good luckand god bless, pam

Hi Michelle, I agree with all the other lovely ladies. Use this tool correctly and you'll get there...an XL or smaller! Do I detect a bit of jealousy from your friend?? the newfound attention you will receive might be pushing her behind the crowd, so to speak. Thats an issue I'm dealing with right now with my SIL...she's very beautiful, petite and always has been. here comes Deb (me), starting out at 344, 5'10" and down 118 pounds (went from a size 30/32 tight to an xl top, 18 bottom) and people are noticing the new me, not the old SIL. But as some of you know I do have SIL issues (yup, thats the one!) Hang in there, Michelle. You'll get out of the plus size dept before you know it.

One of these days you're going to look at that XL and say "Geez, this is WAAAY to big for me" You know, our friends sometimes have their own agenda, which we must not allow to get in our way. I have a very good friend that is 'normal' sized. She's always been on the heavier side (say 16's or 18's) of normal. I can tell you that she was very happy for me, but also felt, well, basically, threatened by the potential that I would be smaller than her. Because, hey, after all, she may be chunky, but at least she wasn't as fat as me! I was sort of her benchmark for her self image. I don't know why. It doesn't really make sense. I don't think she understands it either. But, I can tell you that she is now getting all of my 'fat' clothes, even though she has lost 20 lbs w/weigh****chers recently. She's happy to have them, but I know that it really irks her deep down. Anyway, maybe that's not the case with your friend...but it's good to keep in mind. Perhaps your friend only wanted to keep you from disappointment...but, then again, being an excellent study of people, I'd say she's not comfortable with the thought of you being smaller. If her priorities were straight, she'd be encouraging you and building your self esteem, not cutting you down from the get go. Oh well, we're all human. Oh yeah- BTW- I am now is a size SMALL from Womens 28. I STILL can't comprehand this, but it's true. Never in my wildest dreams... So, if I can get in the 'normal' sizes- you can too!

Unrealistic? NO - its not beyond reason to think that you will be in a medium or a large! If you do what your surgeon instructs you to do, you will not believe how great you will look and feel! I agree thoroughly with Lisa - your friend is probably feeling threatened! We all know someone who is threatened with our success. For me, its my mother -- I've always been heavy, and she's always been thin. She's ALWAYS spoken negatively to me about my weight -- in fact she still can't give me a compliment without an insult as well. Anyways, since my surgery, my sister told her that I would probably be smaller than her, so my mother has been exercising like a bandit and she's been on every kind of fad diet there is! I have to say though, that I can't wait to be smaller then her (I hate to feel that way, but I do). You will do fantastic - just set your mind to it, stick to your doctor's orders, and you'll be looking great in no time. God Bless, Kathy Bilodeau Lap RNY 12/3/03 -85 lbs.

Hi Kathy, I know what you mean abut Mothers. When I saw mine for the first time Post-op, I was down 94 pounds and after looking at me up and down she said "You don't look like you lost that much weight." What a welcome home that was. No wonder I moved 300 miles away!

There's always somebody! My Mother is probably pretty sure I won't catch her at her current weight (115) but has in the past been competitive about weight. Once she tried on a dress of mine (at the time I was around where I am now - it was a size 16 dress) and said, "the bottom fit okay but the top was too big, so I felt better." I wanted to shoot her!! I replied "oh, it's okay to be fat, as long as I'm not as fat as my daughter!!" She got embarrassed, but that's what she meant, really. She seems glad to see the weight loss this time. My sister, on the other hand, is a problem. She was near-anorexic in high school, then maintained a healthy weight for quite a few years. Over the last 15 years she's gained quite a bit of weight, but she's in complete denial. Would say things like, this must be Kathleen's, it's in a large size. Meanwhile she's was around the same size as me! Now I definitely weigh quite a few lbs. less than her, but she's deeply in denial. She started to diet right after I had the surgery but she hasn't stuck with it. I find it interesting as well that, for me not so much friends, but co-workers have interesting reactions. There are a couple of women who were so upbeat & complimenting me on how great I looked. Now, they're not really acknowledging my existence ... could it be because I'm at or below their weight now? I think so!! People are funny.