Am I the only one?

Hello Everyone!! I am new here but have been lerking around for a while. I have started the WLS process. I had my Psyc evaluation about 3 weeks ago. I met with the dietion two weeks ago and I guess now I just wait to hear from Dr. Bell.?. I am 5 foot tall and 218 pounds. I have chronic back pain and shortness of breath I have a Thyroid dissorder and I am anmic. I am so scared that I wont get approived for the WLS. I know that the Psuc and dietion approived me but what is my Ins doesnt or Dr. Bell doesnt. I am so worried because I really feel like this is my last shot of being healthy. Does anyone know what my next step is with Dr. Bell? I havent even met him yet but I have already shelled out 400.00 to get this thing started. I wonder how long the wait will be?? I am also scared to go to the group meetinmg because I am very shy and also its so hard for me to admit how fat I really am. Am I crazy? Did anyone else ever feel like this?? Please help me!! Thanks Melissa l-o

Melissa -- You're losing lots of energy worrying about things you can't yet control -- my first piece of advice is to calm down! The nutritionist & psychiatrist have approved you -- that's a good first step. As for qualifying, at your height & weight, your BMI is over 40, which, unless your insurance plan has some sort of exclusion on weight loss surgery, makes you eligible. I'm 5'2" and my starting weight was 252. I'd roller coasted from 200-250 for the last 7 years, and I know how hard it is to really accept the weight you're at, but once you do it gets less painful emotionally in my mind. And as for being at the meetings and being shy, I don't think there are many people who don't feel shy at one of these things. The best thing to do at your first meeting is to listen to others and their experiences. You've taken good first steps. It's a nerve-wracking process, but you're doing it. Have faith in you & what you want for yourself. And by the way, just about everybody feels the way you do, in my humble opinion!! Take care, Kathy F.

One of my biggest issues is that I worry way too much! I know that I am like that but I take baby steps everyday to try to control it. I was never shy like I am now. In high school I was a cheerleader...thats right all 103 pounds of me. In the past 10 years I have gained more weight than I weighed...if that makes any since. I am now 27 years old, divoriced but very happy about that because it was a very awful, abusive relationship. I am now living with my boyfriend of 3 years and we are raising our 21 month old baby girl. I used to be a very active/happy person and now days I feel like I dont get enough sleep ever and for the most part I am not all that happy. I love Chad and Maya but I dont like my self to much. I love who I am on the inside but can hardley stomach what my outsides have turned into. I WANT SO BAD TO BE HAPPY AND HEALTHY again. I hape so bad that WLS happens for me. Anyhow Kathy thanks for your reply. I dont know if I will ever beable to accept the weight I am right now....I will try but its going to be a tough one!!!!!!!!!!

Believe me, I'm the queen of the worry warts! If there's nothing to worry about, I'll create something because it's how I operate. I was a skinny kid but started gaining weight at puberty. That's when I went from an outgoing, precocious kid to a silent, painfully shy teenager. And as far as accepting your weight, it's just a temporary thing. Should everything go through & you have the surgery, that number's going to go down rapidly! Being on this message board and talking openly about morbid obesity, etc. really helped me feel less stigmatized by my weight -- I saw smart, kind, wonderful people who suffered from the same things I did. It sort of desensitizes you to talk about it and read about it. You'll be fine. Deep breaths!! Kathy F.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR ADVICE! Im still working on being me I guess!

Hi Melissa, First of all - go to the support groups. You will get sooo much out of them. I usually go to the ones at Yale - so just find me and sit with me so you won't feel uncomfortable. Secondly, Linda will review your insurance, etc., and will have a good idea in advance if your insurance will give you a hard time or not. I seriously doubt that Dr. Bell will deny you if the Psych eval; diatician and your PCP are all in favor of your having the surgery - so don't worry about it. Let me know if I can be of any other help to you. Dr. Bell is a wonderful surgeon, and you are in great hands with everyone at his practice. RELAX! God Bless, Kathy Bilodeau Lap RNY 12/3/03 -80 lbs.

Thank you so much! Did your Insurance company give you a tough time? I have BC/BS of Mass. Their requirements are a 40BMI or higher..Im 42.5, attempts at weightloss have failed, no untreated thyroid disorders and you have to have been obese for at least 5 years. I am a little worried beacuse as everyone has I have been dietng my whole life but I have never really done any dieting that was supervised. I did do weigh****chers about 5-6 years ago but thats the closes I have ever came to being supervised. Other than that I have done slim-fast, atkins, liquid, trim-spa, Xynadrin (SP?) hydroxie cut, matabolife, dexatrim....You name it I have tried it!!!I did slim-fast for about a year and did lose weight on it but at the same time I was only eating 700-900cals a day! I just worry that my ins. co. wont think I have tried hard enough to lose weight! Did you have these same fears??