....and I'm off.

My consultation is complete. Wooohoooo I thought this day would never come. Now I have this list I have to go through but I have 1 up. I already am being treated by a pulmonary guy so just need to have him put it in writing that I'm ok for surgery. Anything that puts me ahead of the game is awesome. The only thing I really don't look forward to besides the sleep apnea testing is the Barium swallow. Had one before but because it has been over 2 years I have to do it again. Yuckies...Anyway some of you might remember me posting about WWIII at my house when I attended the informational Seminar. Well I dropped the subject with my family and most friends after that so not to deal with the negative. I was totally caught off guard by my boyfriend who I thought was going to support my decision tonight. He came out with phrases like "why can't you just start walking?" , "why can't you just diet and lose the weight?" I was so PO'd. I couldn't say a word. I was so upset I just started to cry and handed my friend the phone as he was yelling and told her I can't talk to him right now. He after said he will be there for me but can't understand why I am doing this to myself. He doesn't understand that I have tried all diets known to man. I have fluctuated between 230 and 330 for the past 5 years and Now was weighed after being on all that prednisone I now weigh 376. That was reason enough for me to bawl my eyes out tonight. I really didn't need anyone to aggrevate me more. So the Doc wants me to lose 20 lbs. I need to read up on The South Beach Diet. My friend bought me the book so I'll start this gung ho and get all these appointments in so I can join all of you blessed to have made it to the other side. My boyfriend did say something that you all told me about and he wouldn't admit it but he said he saw people or know of people who have had this surgery and after they lose the weight they become ****y and ****ty or just full of themselves. So i asked him. Are you afraid to lose the woman your claiming to love? He said no but I'm thinking otherwise. I know people change. Become more confident or outgoing. Then he also asked what my new compulsion will be? Since it won't be food, will it be drugs? Gambling or whatever else? I pretty much told him that is not how it's going to go and Hopefully I will think of something creative to turn to and with couseling with be aware of this obsessive behavior. Anyway...Thank God for this web site and all of you. Without you guys I wouldn't have a place to come vent where everyone understands in one way or another what I am going through. Good night all and God Bless. ~Julie~ P.S. Sorry if I jumped around and babbled my little heart away. Thanks again Tove.

Hi Julie, You know, I didn't tell very many people at all before my surgery - in fact, some still don't know! I did not want to deal with negative comments from people who cared. I told my mother about the surgery the day AFTER I had it done! She was not happy, but it made it much easier to deal with everything I needed to deal with without added confusion and fear. All that being said, understand that they care about you and are concerned, but, this is a decision that you need to be comfortable with. They may never be as comfortable with it as you are -- so be prepared for that. This is a great group, and we will be here to help you through it. Keep up the good work. God Bless, Kathy

Hi Julie, This is your body, your decision that you have to live with! I know that sounds so simple,but isnt that the bottom line?I have a big family,as well as hubby and 2 daughters.My husband and family were told that I was seriously thinking about this operation many months ago, and that I was still researching.I wasn't looking for their advice,and all they said was too make sure I understood all i could before the final decison.After I made up my mind, I guess I came across so confident with this, that they didnt utter a word of negativity.There were a few questions about "how it works",but that was the extent of it.My husband has been supportive all along, and he too knew it was my decision and my decision alone.My biggest worry was the reaction and questions from the nurses I work with,but I was surprised with there words of encouragement and "good for you" and pride in making such a big decision.I seem to have gotten off a little here but what I am trying to say is this.I would not deal with people's negativity,and feel this is so stressful as it is, that I am prepared to tell whoever I need to,either support me or dont say a word! Julie, be proud of your courage,be strong in your convictions, and be your own best advocate.Hang in there, I and so many people, are very proud of you,and how you are dealing with the adversity around you.We are here for you always. Carol

Your boyfriend sounds verbally abusive, I had a husband who talked like that to me for 25 years, so I know about that. I think you are to be commended for being honest about your size, and for trying the most effective option available today. Maybe someday in the future no one will have this problem. I wish you success on your journey and I enjoy reading your posts.