second guessing ....

Good Evening Folks, I've only posted once before to congratulate a post op- but this time I need some help.. I'm pretty close to surgery, just waiting for insurance approval-My date is "penciled in" for Dec. 29th.. anyway- to the point- a friend of mine's husband works at US Surgical and after I had tea with her this afternoon she relayed my WLS info to her husband- who promptly told her to "Get her on the phone".. because of his position he has had some close inside experience with the WLS -even observing a surgery- well, basically he scared me - asked me to reconsider, told me the risk factor was sky high, told me people loved me just as I am etc... I've been in tears ever since... I'm confused and more than a little concerned wondering if I am doing the right thing , I don't have any other weight related health issues (yet)... any advice- please

Wow, Elaine, this is tough to hear after researching, soul searching and finally coming to this decsion. I can only speak from my own experience, but I would never presume to know what is in someone's heart. When I finally made the decision to have WLS, I knew I had researched it as much as I could and that I knew in my deepest heart that I had tried every diet I could think of and given it my all. Above all that, I knew I was slowly dieing and that I probably wouldn't be around to play with my grandchildren. My sky high blood pressure, inability to move around, my borderline diabetes. All this made me realize I needed to do this. I had already had my appt with Dr. Giles before I told my husband and I told him I was doing this with or without his support. I knew I needed to save my life. And you know what? I did. I HAVE a life now. I can move, I can feel comfortable in my own skin. I thank God every day for giving me the strength to make this decision. So you need to look inside YOU and ask yourself what is best for you. You will always find someone to say don't do it. I hope this helps hugs Cheryl

Elaine, this is certainly a decision that you have to make for yourself and only one you alone can make. I have no advice other than to share with you how I came to my own decision. I was not thrilled about having major surgery and fully aware of all the risks, however, I was and am fully aware of all the risks of not having this surgery. Dying from a heart attack or stroke, diabetes out of control, or worse being a prisoner in my own body. We take risks every day, some of the consciously and others are just part of life. My one comment re your friend's husband saying people love you just the way you are........well my question is do you love yourself the way you are? That is the key question. Good luck in what every you decide. The choice must be right for you

I have to agree with the very lovely two ladies who posted before me on this subject. I would like to add that as with ANY surgery, you are risking your life. You have to decide if the pro's of WLS outweigh the risks. In my case all I had to do was look to my mother and father. Most of my family is obese and so are my parents. My Mom has conjestive heart failure, and another heart condition I cant think of the name, her brother also has heart problems, her sister has diabetes. My Dad has Diabetes, sleep apnea with a permenant trec in his throat so he can breath without obstruction, phlebitus, congestive heart failure, and 2 different kinds of arthitis. I might be forgetting a few things with him but even if I did, thats still quite a list. These are things I had to look forward to if I remained obese. There was no question in my mind that if I didnt have the surgery last month, within less than a year I would have had diabetes again (I was diagnosed with it back in March this year but with a few modifications to my diet, I was able to reverse it because I was in such an early stage of it) and then from there who knows what else. I am thankful I had the surgery and I am now on my way to a brand new me. If I did die today, I would be a happier person than I was just 6 weeks ago. You have a lot of thinking you still need to do. No one can tell you that this surgery isnt risky and you should just go ahead and have it because they think its ok. Its all up to you. Your surgeon friend might know a thing or two about the surgery, more than any of us could ever know, but there are tons of people here who had this surgery and I have yet to hear any one of them say it was not worth it. I wish you the best, and hope that you make the right choice for you. Take care. Ellie Quigley http://www.weightlosschronicle.com

Thank you all -- I woke up this morning feeling much better... after viewing your advise and talking with several close friends I'm feeling more confidant about surgery again.. Happy Holiday