Body image

Ok, so the goal of WLS is to LOSE weight. I accomplished that part- now I am 18 months post-op and I am having severe body image issues. I have lost 250 pounds so needless to say I am having some mjor extra skin issues. I do plan on having plastics someday. Right now I am focusing on trying to have a baby. I think it's pointless to have my tummy lifted if I am only going to stretch it out once I am able to (hopefully)conceive. I see pictures of myself and I think I look sick. My face, neck, and chest are SO boney but the rest of me is.......well, NOT boney. I am looking for advice on how others accept their "new" bodies. I am so thankful for the weight I have lost so trust me I am NOT complaining. Any advice will be appreciated. Oh, one more thing- I have started to wear this crazy one piece- sucker- inner that seems to conceal my "excess baggage" it's just not very comfy- anyone ever try Spanx?? Let me know if you have and if you have been comfy wearing them. Thanks! Christine

Hey Christine, First off "Kudo's" for the Excellent job you have done onyour "Journey". The extra skin is the "Badge of Honor" we wear to show how commited we are to our goal of a healthier new life! Just know that your man loves you just as much now as when you were heavy so don't worry abouyt the extra skin. Your still the same "Precious Person" you have always been,and when the time comes for you to do something about that skin, then you do it. Have a great day and keep looking at the beautiful Lady in the mirror! Take Care,

Wow... so well said. I think a bit of wisdom we all can learn from. Thanks Julio. T.

hi julio read your reply to body image sounds good but that is also my fear about extra skin but your answer made me think of the reason why i had the band and it was for health i am 51 newly married have 2 kids and 6 grands thanks for your positive feedback to christine deb c

Hi Christine: First.. I read a sister OHer's profile today... it started with these quotes. I pass them along... ___________________ The beauty of my body is not measured by the size of the clothes it can fit into, but by the stories that it tells. I have a belly and hips that say, "We grew a child in here," and breasts that say, "We nourished life." My hands, with bitten nails and a writer's callus, say, "We create amazing things." I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon. ~Ellen DeGeneres Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a lovely and well-preserved body, but rather a skid to broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "WOW! What a ride!" __________________ That said... for me... It is a continuing journey to accept my new body with it's flaws. It is a continuing journey to accept the THE BEAUTY OF MY BODY within those same flaws. And, like you, I am not complaining. I would take the hanging skin any day over the fuller body. One of the things I have found is that (some how) exercise helps me with my body image. I am not talking about how exercise changes the physical... I am talking (here) about my own experience with exercise and how it effects my self esteem around my feelings of my new body. (for me exercise has become almost a spiritual journey back to me) I am thinking it puts me more in touch with my body and helps me feel stronger, hence.. feeling better about this body in general. I know that when I don't exercise, there is a direct connection to my body image. Does this make any sense? It does for me. For me, shame is a killer and I work to let that go. I try each day to see the good in myself and my body. Some days I have a harder time appreciating what I have been given. Some days I excel at that, being grateful that all my body parts function well. I made a pact with my body when I had this surgery. We are a team... so I am learning to appreciate all that my body does for me... gives me and offers the world. Baby steps. Thanks for bringing this topic up. Good luck with your journey to get pregnant. T.

Christine... Such wonderful replies from Towanda and Julio. I don't have much to add to that except for an opinion on Spanx. I have one and LOVE it!! Very comfortable, almost forget I have it on.... and it tucks everything in nicely. Congrats on such great success....hoping to read about new addition to your family soon. Terri

I had to think long and hard before I answered your post....This body image thing is a problem I also have....Julio and T. gave you great answers, very insightful. Mine is not as deep....Basically, I have picked a body part that I do like. In my case it's my legs...Now, they are not perfect either, but I have chosen to ignore their imperfections...I love my strong, long legs....The other parts of me????Not so much... And I try to focus on the good things about my body...Like the fact that I feel so strong...I get kinda playful with that, and have adapted that silly "persona"::Warrior Princes...I do feel strong and powerful in my new body, and that fact lets me accept it as it is (somewhat, on most days).... Other than that, I kinda feel like you....thankful for the weight I have lost (REALLY THANKFUL) I have not tried spanx myself, but will get some..have heard really good things about them. Usually I wear a one piece, and have actually found a couple that are comfy... Most are not really comfortable though... Good luck on your quest to have a baby. I will keep you in my prayers. You sound like a fantastic person... Dorota

WOW!! You guys are great~ I can't thank you enough for all your kind words. Julio, I must say- your post really touched me. I thought about your words and I agree, I embrace my "excess"..it is a badge of honor for me (in a weird kind of way.) My DH loved me at 422 pounds and he loves me now- life is good! I appreciate all your words of encouragement~ this board really has been such a support for me. A big "THANKS" to all my CT buddies! Christine