Well I think your feelings are absolutely normal. I'm glad to hear that your working on making all those negative thoughts into positive ones...that's all any of us can do. Congrats on your surgery date. If your insurance covers weight loss surgeries then they should approve you because of your BMI. Most insurance companies that include WLS approve those over a BMI of 40 and 35+ with comorbidities.  I just wanted to say that I had been morbidly obese since childhood and until a few years ago I did not have one problem with it. Doctors would screen me over and over again just knowing that I was pre-diabetic, had high cholesterol, had high blood pressure, etc. and I never did. I was a perfectly healthy big gal except some back problems that run in my family. Well it didn't last...all of a sudden my body literally started shutting down. My reproduction system litterally quit working because of the strain of my weight. A specialist said I would be diabetic within 3-5 years. Alot of us can be healthy at large sizes...but it catches up to all of us eventually.  We can let ourselves feel guilty and ashamed and do nothing about our weight or we can face those hard facts and do something about our weight. I think everyone has to try the diet and exercise approach many times before they resort to weight loss surgery. I think everyone has to really sit down and evaluate if they are really prepared for all that major surgery and life after weight loss surgery entails. But once you truly committ and embrace all that weight loss surgery is...then it's much easier. Good luck!

Thanks for all the kind words.  Yesterday I had a consult with the surgeon, and I have a surgery date - June 11th. It is so far out because my wife is a teacher, and our lives are simpler after school gets out.  I still have to get the insurance company to pay - it is the first time a doctor ever told me I might be too healthy. I have a BMI of 50, but I have no related health issues.  They thought they could get it to go through, but it might take some pushing... I've spent a lot of time thinking about whether I think it is cheating, and I've decided I don't.  In fact, while those were the words first put to the feeling,  I'm not sure they were ever the right words.  I think that my hesitation here is driven by not liking to make the admission that I'm unable to lose the weight on my own. I think I felt that way 15 years ago when I first walked into Weigh****chers, and I quickly came to terms with that, so I'm guessing I'll do it again here. I'll keep you posted, Al

Years ago I heard about weight loss surgeries and I just rolled my eyes...."I'll never be so bad off I need something like that!" was my mindset. Well once I hit over 300 lbs and my health was getting bad I also got the talk from my specialist saying that I needed to lose weight now or I'd be diabetic in 3-5 years...I was 24 at the time...that's scary. I have been overweight since early childhood and it was only getting worse as I got older so I decided that the time for trying to lose weight on my own was over. I also did some research and there are alot of scientific studies out there that state some simple facts like what another poster put. If you are morbidly obese or more then your odds of losing weight and keeping it off are about like winning the jackpot in a lotto. There are other studies about the trendy weight loss surgeries saying they are great for people who need to lose 20 lbs temporarily...but not for us who are so overweight. Most of us have an eating addiction. I did not believe i did until after surgery when I didn't have food anymore. I didn't want to eat...I could barely drink water for awhile...but in my mind I still wanted a giant cheeseburger, fries and coke more than anything! I still have a food addiction but it's much easier to control now. At first I wanted a lap band because it was an in and out procedure...much less complications...it just seemed so much better. But I started looking into each surgery and I decided RNY was best for me...it was permanent...it resulted in the largest amount of weight loss and has big positive results very soon. I've met people who have been very successful with the lap band and I've met those that have failed and gone to RNY and been sucessful...I've also met folks who have regained their weight after RNY. It's all in how you use the tools...The people who gained their weight back knew that they were and just ignored it...gaining your weight back can happen quicker than you think but it's not a surprise. Anyways!  It's completely normal to be leery about the surgery...if you weren't I'd worry! It's a HUGE step and we have always been taught we are overweight because we are lazy and if we just tried we'd get rid of it. We are hardest on ourselves. I still feel a bit guilty about having the surgery...embarrassed that I let myself get so big. But that lasts about a second when I realise that instead of staying big and dying early I did something about it. Once you feel like a normal sized person that's healthy and full of life...you barely care about the hardships of the surgery to get there. You have to work at it forever to keep it off...but it's so much easier to do that once it's gone and you have a tool in place to help you.  Some people I knew were leery about me getting a surgery to lose weight...EVERYONE is very supportive and positive about the surgery since they have seen what it's done for me. Anyone that doesn't support you either doesn't understand what the surgery entails or doesn't truly care for you...that's harsh but it's true.  Reserach shows being obese you will have years of your life lost due to obesity related medical conditions and the quality of your life will be considerably lessened. When you start to think about weight in medical and health perspectives it makes alot more sense. If your goal is to look pretty then it will be a harder process....looking good is a definite perk but it can't be your goal. Anyways I've run on enough...good luck with everything. Go to support groups to talk to other folks who've gone through it and are going through the same worries as you.

My hair fell our really badly too from about 4 months out until about 8 months. My hair has always been really thick so I my hair never looked bad but it was still a really traumatic experience every time I brushed my hair I'd have to clean my brush out because there would be a handful of hair in it. Every time I took a shower several hand fulls...literally...would come out. My husband would have to continously unclog the shower. It was really scary even though I knew why it was happening, shock from the surgery. But now that I am almost a year out there is no more hair loss...lost hair has grown out a bit...and everything is fine. I've met some ladies who had really really thin hair after surgery...mostly because these people had kinda thin hair to start with. But their hair grew back out over time and you'd never have known. There are LOTS of ups and down before and after surgery...but we get through them...and almost everyone would do it again in a heart beat and are very happy with the surgery. The people who aren't happy are the ones who don't even try to help themselves...if you put forth a small amout of effort you can be successful...if you put forth alot of effort you will have the most amazing results ever. I'm happy with somewhere in the middle! I went from a tight size 28 to lose size 18s and I'd be happy to stay this size forever. My life has really changed...I am the exact same person I am just able to do all the things I talked about doing. I am more positive and energetic. I am not ashamed of who I am.

I am 6 months out from gastric bybass.  Tomorrow is my 6 month checkup.  Yay!  I've lost about 80 pounds and I know I could have lost more if I'd excercise like I'm supposed to.  Dr. Schoen is my doctor.  I seem to be able to eat more than some of the folks on here, but I do have to take Prevacid 2 times a day.  I can't eat port at all any more, it hurts but that only started about a month ago.  Today, this is what I've had. 24 oz sugar free french vanilla cappacino 1 oz string cheese Heart to Heart cereal, 3/4 to 1 cup, with 1 cup Dannon Light and Fit yogurt 1/2 cut chili with beans and 5 saltine crackers 16 oz sugar free mocha 1 bag of 100 calorie lorna doones For the rest of the day, I'll have something like a lean cusine dinner and a Sobe Lean (12.5 calories per bottle) and it is really good-  cranberry grapefruit flavor.  But I digress, then I'll have 2-3 sugar free popsicles, one bottle regular water and another cup of the Heart to Heart honey toasted oat cereal.  All this amounts to about 1000 calories a day.  When I eat more protein and less cappicino and more water, I lose weight faster.  I've been losing about 8-10 pounds a month and so far am not displeased. I use Fitday.com to track my meals.  I've gone from a size 28-30 to a size 18-20 and I'm feeling ever so much better than I was.   My hair is getting really thin but I do also have thyroid problems which cause some of it.  I know that most bypass patients do lose some hair, but mine is getting really bad.  I'm actually considering a wig.  I'm going to talk to the nutritionist tomorrow. I hope this helps.  I guess the most telling thing I can tell you is that I wish I'd done this years ago.  I feel like I've gotten a new lease on life.