Hopping to Make Friends but need Support

As you can tell I'm new to this board but I have lurked for a long time. I posted earlier and thank you so much for your response. It's really nice to have people in the State around you, it give you a sense of security. I'm in the process of sending my paper work but I have yet to get my hopes up, although I have thought LONG and hard about this I'm not sure if I would get approved. On the flip side I have been really down lately, I feel as though my life is in termoil and everything crappy keeps happening. My husband and I have been at our wits end with each other, and I know it has to do with me. I'm very disappointed in my life, my weight, my family and job. Mostly with my job! I quit an "okay" job after 8 years to DIVE into Mortgage Lending, I'm a Loan Officer and I love my job & I do a really really good job! BUT it has been a struggle after struggle to build my businss, I'm okay one month and dying the next. (commission only) I work really really hard but the competition has kicked my butt! I try though. On the flip side my husbands business that kept us afloat on our "down" time BUT his business has been slow.....meaning the pressure is on me. I have always been the bread winner and provider in the family but the pressure and stress is driving me to drink. (or close to it) I finally broke down and told my husband to get a job, that has not gone well. (anbody in northern CO hiring? :@)) With this long drawn out message how do I give confidence in my husband to provide more without putting him down? AND Even though I have tried really hard and my business is getting better should I just give it all up and get a job. To support what my husband is not doing With this stress I have eaten and eaten...I wonder what I will do when I can't do that, food is my comfort. I have gained another 3 lbs on the scale, I have never been this heavy. I don't have many friends so I welcome any advice. Thanks, Depressed/frustrated/AHHHHHH Catherine

Catherine, Know that everyone here has gone through crisis just as you are doing now and it is a hard road to go down. None of us made this decision lightly and we are here to help support you whenever we can. Please, the very first thing get some help with the depression. Then you can help yourself and your husband. Do not let this completely overwhelm you before you go for help. I think a great many of us in this forum have been plagued with depression and most of us have had help to get through it. You get some assistance and I believe you will find things will look a little different when you can look at them without the black clouds over your head. God bless you and remember we are here for you.