Has anyone out there...

Had their surgery recently that were not expecting to have an open procedure and that is the way it had to be done? I am five weeks out and I was so sure the whole time that I wouldn't be in the 3% to have an open procedure and I sort of came out of anesthesia and they told me it had to be open. I could have cried. I still do sometimes. I have this eight in*****ision on my stomach plus two drainage holes that have healed and sealed. I can't help but be depressed about the way my surgery was done. My mom, my biggest cheerleader, keeps telling me that "yeah, it wasn't expected but now we have to move on, get healed and follow instructions." I am doing all that I have put neosporian on my incision and drainage holes. Now I am starting to put vitamin E on the scars. I look in the mirror and all I see is how chopped up my body looks and feels, I try to see the changes everyone else sees and I don't. And it seems all the emails I come across and the people I am meeting in my support group had their surgery lap. I just keep singing the song from Seseme Street... you moms will know it, "One of these things is not like the others. One of these things just doesn't belong" I feel like I'm waiting for the song to end and then be pointed out of the group. Is it okay to feel this way? Is there anyone else out there that is feeling this way or has felt this way? I need to talk to someone who understands. I just don't know how to feel better about this. Please help me! Staci

I am sorry for your troubles. I have not had the surgery yet. I have to say though that everyone I know just about is all chopped and diced in some way or another. My sister had a double mastectomey a few years ago and a reconstruction at the same time plus she had three of the up and down type c sections she feels like Frankenstein. I have had two surgerys on various parts and have scars and a C section scar. Plus I have massive scarring on my arms from some problems years ago. My mom has a scar across her throat. I understand the disappointment though I would feel the same way. Trying to do something to better yourself and what happens? Feel free to email me to vent.