THe Question no one likes to read about?

Did You think..... "What If I Don't Wake Up After My Surgery?"... and did you have plans in case?....

How did you keep yourself calm?... and know it's going to be alright???

I think that runs thru everyones mind for anything of procedure or surgery. Anytime I am put to sleep I wonder that as I have problems with anethesia. Did I have a plan? no, I just told everyone before that  I loved them  and had faith in my surgeon and anethesiologist.

I spent a night or two before my surgery writing letters to each of my kids and my husband with the whole "what if" and the thoughts that I had for them.  I let them all know how I felt about each one of them, what I wanted for them in their lives and told them how much I loved each of them.  That was totally catatharitc for me and it helped me to go into the surgery EXCITED for what was to come..... Having these feelings are totally normal, with any type of surgery- like Darlene said.  You just kind of have to "let go, let God" (if you believe in that sort of thing).  I was confident with my surgeon's abilities and the choice that I had made for myself.  I am coming up on 3 years post-op.  Those letters still sit in our fire safe box, unopened.... Best of luck to you!!

I certainly had those thoughts. As a matter of fact, I forced myself to review the memorial board before deciding to have surgery. I didn't kid myself; death was a possibility. But I also knew that my entire life is in God's hands no matter what. I also knew that at the rapid pace I was going with weight gain and comorbids, I wasn't going to get any healthier. I needed to do this surgery now to increase my odds of success. So I wrote individual letters to each family members, explaining why I took the chance, describing my state of mind, my love for them, and hopes for their futures. I cried my eyes out. It was a really difficult exercise, but I felt so calm after that. Almost numb. I gotta tell you, I sure am happy to be here to write this to you! It's a calculated risk, but I'm sure you've done your research. Find peace in the fact that, odds are, you'll be on your way to a healthier lifestyle! Wishing you well, Rachel

I wrote a goodbye "just in case" letter to my daughter. But at that point in my life, I determined I wasn't really living and needed to take a risk for better health and life! It all worked out, yes bad things do happen, but they are not that common. focus on the good, posivitive changes that will be headding your way.

 

A decent amount of fear is a good thing!

 Good luck!

My daughter (11yo) asked what would happen if I died. We are a real "matter-of-fact" kind of family. I just said that Dad would carry on raising her and her brother, I had a pretty good life insurance policy, and everything would still be OK. She cried a little and I said that my surgeon had not "lost" anyone yet, and I had had a couple surgeries in the past, including giving birth to her, so she needed to trust the medical teams as much as I did. I also reminded her, and my dad, who was freaking out even more, that if I didn't have the surgery, I would probably suffer from stroke or heart attack within the next 10 years anyway. Our family trust and wills are always up to date, as they should be for everyone especially if children and property are involved.

ALONG with this question---- do you do an advanced directive---and/or a health power of atty when you get to the hospital?? 

I guess I was a bit different - I weighed out my age, current health and my doctor's history and didn't worry at all about it. I did hug my kids but I assumed everything would be ok... I was pretty uneducated and have learned enough since surgery to know that not even considering it was a huge mistake that luckily didn't explode in my families face. Count the costs and risks and write your letters, have your conversations, just in case. C h e e r s, gene

I wrote out a page of instructions for my husband, telling him that I loved him and that I felt the surgery was the best thing for me, even with the possibility that I might not survive.  Then I told him what to do with the family heirlooms and all my quilting stuff.  Okay, maybe I wasn't thinking really clearly, but I figured he'd keep everything else, but what would he do with several unfinished quilts that were promised to family members.  Then I "hid" the letter under some papers on his dresser.  I knew if I told him about it, he'd freak out even more.  Like others said, it really eased my mind.  --  Carol

I updated all of my beneficiary information and left it with my good friend.  After my mother died and I saw the horrible way her children behaved I believe that no matter what if there are children and property involved papers should be up to date... I saw how my mom died (lots of comorbilities, etc) and I knew thatI wasn't going to "live" like that.  So surgery was my only option. MsShell