Need some help to decide...

Hi everyone my name is Deb and this is my first time posting. I am probably 3 weeks away from surgery and could use some help. I have been looking at this surgery for about 4 years now. I am now qualified for surgery by insurance and have started the ball rolling. I have met with Dr. Villares, the psychologist, nutritionist and am now waiting for ins. approval. Once approved the surgery can happen almost immediately. I have researched this topic for years and have talked to many people post op but it hasn't lessened my fears and concerns about life after surgery. I was wondering if any of you could talk to me about what you went through, both good and bad. Would you do surgery again? What would you do differently? I am really concerned about how dificult it was to change your eating habits. Do you miss eating like you used to? Did you lose hair?, What about the excess skin? How long till you really felt better physically and emotionally? I would appreciate any info you could give me, as I want to go into this fully informed. I may also change my mind and not go through with surgery. Thank you, Deb.

Hi Deb, I'm 3+ years post-op and would absolutely have Weight Loss Surgery again! However, I think I'd go for the Rny with the silastic ring (Fobi Pouch) to help keep my stoma from stretching and to get a little longer honeymoon period out of the losing run. I had Dr. Zahn who trained Dr. Villares. I would have gone with a more aggressive surgeon too. I LOVEd DR. Zahn's mannerism and before/after care but he would only do proximals and absolutely refused to talk about doing distals. I have had very few complications but I have been pretty tight with following rules. I lost 20 pounds prior ot my surgery, gave up soda 1 month early, etc. I exercised as soon as I could after recovering from an OPEN Rny, always put protein first and I did my own research and veered from my hospital's post-op plan. I'm grateful I found out what really works for post-ops and have been having at least one to 4 protein drinks a day since the day I got home from the hospital. I've been diligent with my vitamins and other supplements and have had good labs as a result. The lifestyle as a post-op does take focus. If you were to select the lap-band as your surgery, you would have to plan very healthy small meals (much like a Weigh****cher plan; only have restriction with it) and you would have to be diligent with getting your fills. But, they don't have the big vitamin, protein drink regime to follow. The Rny patients have to worry about malnutrition and malabsorption and so we need to be diligent in our supplements. Exercise, water and lab follow-up should be part of everyon'e post-op lifestyle. Statistics suggest that any of the surgeries all have about the same amount of success at an even 3 years post-op. If you have any co-morbidities then to me losing the weight that is keeping you unhealthy is a no brainer! I was on 11 different medications and now just take my vitamins! The little supplement inconvenience is still not even close to all the meds, shots, and finger *****ing stuff I had to do as a pre-op! Go for it! Live for your future so you can participate in your life rather than just sitting on the sidelines out of breath watching it go by! Let us know the who, when and where and if you need and angel! Hugs, Joyce

Joyce, thank you for answering my post. Should I be asking Dr. villares about the Fobi Pouch? Is this common? I haven't heard of this before. Is it even more restrictive? What exactly is a proximal vs. a distal? I have checked out some books and will read up on things but I find that talking to someone who has been through it is the way to go. Dr. V advocates RNY and not the lap band. So I will follow his advice on that. He seems pretty sharp..very young..but pretty sharp. I think some of my main concerns post op are the hair loss and the skin. I already hate looking in the mirror!! I have a terrific hubby but a girl at work says the surgery has not improved her love life, actually just the opposite. She thinks the skin is the issue. Is this normal for me to be so fearful and nervous? I have had surgeries before, and I am a nurse so hospitals and stuff like that doesn't bother me in the least. Do you find this a typical response from other pre-op's? Do you personally find most post op's to be successful with keeping off the weight? What would you consider your biggest struggles? thanks again, Deb

Debbie, Here are some links to study. You are welcome to attend our Chandler Support Group. It is held the 2nd and 4th Tuesdays of the month and is a great place to get generic pre-surgery (and post-op) questions answered by experts who have "been there and done that". Let me know if you would like more details about the meetings. http://www.win.niddk.nih.gov/publications/choosing.htm http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/03/06/AR2006030601151.html http://www.webmd.com/medical_information/condition_centers/weight_control/default.htm http://www.qualityoflife.org/bariatric/weight-loss-surgery-options.cfm Excellent to tell about Fobi and details of each surgery: http://www.bariatric-surgery.info/ To find a thousand more info links, just Google: Weight Loss Surgery options or Weight Loss Surgery Information Good luck, Joyce

Hi Deb, I had open RNY on Nov. 23, 2005. My doc planned on doing it lap but when he tried.... They found a hernia intertwined in my intestines that they had to "chop out" The doc also removed a peptic ulcer while they were in there. I developed a blood clot in my lungs...which was something that I was terrified of pre-op. I stayed in Phx St. Luke's for 14 days and was totally devistated. Later I had an infection in my insision which took me to the Wound Center in Tempe on a weekly basis for about 7 weeks. I presently only have a weekly blood test (INR) to check how my dosage of blood thinner is doing. Now I am 4 months post-op and life is good!!! I just weighed myself this morning and I am 73 pounds down since the day of my surgery!!! To be honest, the first 2 months after my surgery, I would had NEVER recommended this to anybody. But to tell you the truth, I was so depressed and still kinda in slow-motion. My emotions were all over the place. At about 3 months post-op, I began to feel soooo happy!!! My streatcy jeans fell off of me, my shirts and dresses which were so tight..were now so loose. Sometimes I just smile so much that my face hurts!!! I am a different person now because of my wls. Yes, I went through more stuff than I planned..but I'd do it again in a heart-beat. Please consider as Joyce mentioned previously, your co-morbs. That is the reason I began this journey. This weight was literally killing me. I could see the physical changes of many of the people on this board, my own son included!! This surgery is real and the results are real. Only you can decide however if it is right for you. Hugs,Ginger

Hi Ginger, thank you so much for your reply. You sure went through a lot. You really would do it all again? That is amazing. How are you doing with making sure you get enough water, nutrition and supplements? Is it easier or more difficult that you had imagined? Thanks again, Deb

Hi Deb, It really did take me awhile to get to the point where I could say....Glad I did it. At first, I hated eating..I everything tasted ucky! I always was a fan of water..so that was not a problem. I have a hard problem with the protein drinks/shakes/smoothies. Everytime I try one it's hard to fini****it's like I'm being punished or something. Things taste better to me now but, my mind tells me to eat more food..but my body rejects the "extra" so quickly so I end up throwing allot of food away. Truthfully, I sometimes forget that I had the surgery. For instance, I'll take a bigger bite of something, or eat too fast. My body lets me know...that was a bad choice. I'm still learning. Hugs, Ginger

Deb, I had RNY two years ago and still think it was the best thing I ever did for myself. I understand your hesitation and think you're very wise to research this as much as possible. When I was trying to decide whether or not to have this surgery, I went to a lot of support groups as well as talking to literally hundreds of people on line. I talked to some people who had had some really horrific complications, but they all said that in spite of the complications, it was worth it and they'd do it again. I know that there are some people out there that regret having surgery, but I haven't met any yet. This surgery is not a magic bullet. At two years out, I work just as hard as anyone else to keep weight off. I lost 130 pounds in about 14 months and every day since then has required that I follow a reasonable eating plan and get some exercise. I do know people who have gained most, if not all, of their weight back. I weigh myself everyday (which is a huge point of contention on these boards) and that keeps me on track. If my weight goes up by a couple of pounds, I do careful examination of the situation and refocus to get the weight back off. This weight will only stay off with daily dedication and diligence. I don't feel the least bit deprived where food is concerned. Before surgery, I was under the impression that I could never eat certain foods again. That's not the case for me. I can eat anything - in moderation. This week I am in training at a large conference center where they serve us a really big lunch each day. Today for lunch I had salad, some fajita meat, 4 or 5 tortilla chips and some guacamole. For dessert, I had two bites of chocolate cake. I didn't eat any of the beans, rice, or squash, but I could have had a few bites if I had wanted them. The one thing I won't do is drink soda. My surgeon scared the bejeezuz out of me where that's concerned so I just don't go there. Lots of people drink soda and have no problems. I tried a few sips a long time ago and felt like my tummy was about to blow so I haven't tried since then and don't miss it. Once in a great while I'll have a Bloody Mary or a glass of wine. Some people drink after surgery and some don't. I do know that I can't drink more than 1/2 a glass of wine or a very weak drink or you'll have to peel me off the ceiling. I'm a cheap date. At about 6 months out, I lost a ton of hair. Lots and lots of hair. It's temporary. Almost everyone I know lost hair. It grows back and it's well worth the opportunity to lose the excess weight. The worst part of me was not being able to guzzle water right after surgery. I can now drink normally, but I'll never be able to chug down a big glass of tea or water like I used to. Again, a small price to pay. It took a while to get used to listening to my body. There were times I ate too much, too fast and lost my cookies. I still do that every once in a while, but that's my punishment for not paying attention and it gets me back in focus. Another difficult part for me is getting my head wrapped around my current size. I still feel like I weigh 286 pounds. I still feel like a fat girl and am often surprised when I catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror. I've actually not recognized my own reflection. What I would have done differently is really, really focused on changing my eating habits early on. I've done OK, but probably could have done better. In the beginning, everything you do is dictated by the pouch. You really don't have much control over how much you can put in and we all tend to follow the rules in the beginning. I still tend to try and finish off one last bite rather than throw it away and that gets me in trouble. On my profile, I posted a few things I learned along the way if you'd care to look. As for skin.... I've got more than I need right now. I'm a size 8 woman in a size 26 skin suit. I'm having the excess tummy and arm skin removed on April 4th and will be paying a small fortune out of pocket for that. I was more than happy to write that check. I'm going to be wearing a size that I have never worn as an adult before. Would I do this again? I'd have this surgery every single month if I had to. I feel like I'm living life again instead of waiting for my time on earth to run out. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best of luck. Feel free to e-mail me if I can help. Connie

Connie, Congrats on your 2 year anniversary and on your tremendous success as a post-op!!!! Good luck with your upcoming skin removal. Do you mind sharing surgeon info and generic prices? I've been investigating p.s. too; have gone to 6 consults but have yet to find one that will do the anchor type cut on me....I think it's called the le fleur or something like that. I enjoyed reading your profile and your tips! Joyce

Hi Joyce, I don't mind sharing information at all. I had consults with Dr. Weiner and Dr. Mazaheri for brachioplasty and abdominoplasty. Dr. Weiner was willing to do the Fleur de Lis or anchor cut along with the arm lift for about 12,000. I just didn't "click" with him or his office staff so kept looking. I know other people have been thrilled with his work and pictures that I've seen are impressive, but I wasn't comfortable. I next saw Dr. Mazaheri and was thrilled with him and his staff. I paid a fifty dollar consultation fee and spent two hours with him and his staff. They answered my long, long list of questions, never made me feel rushed and I didn't feel pressured at all. Dr. Mazaheri will not do the anchor cut because he feels that the point were the two incisions meet doesn't get a good blood supply and people with the anchor cut have a lot of complications. I was disappointed at first, but I've seen a lot of posts on the plastic surgery board about people having complications with the anchor cut. Dr. M. will later do the verticle cut if you're not happy with just the horizontal incision (I'm sure there's an added cost for that). I contacted several of his patients and didn't hear anything negative about him at all. I also checked his record with the state board and AMA and he has a clean record. A great deal of his practice is with wls patients. Most of the PS I've contacted by phone or visited don't keep you overnight or at least make it optional. Dr. M insists that you spend at least one night in the surgery center. The total fees with Dr. M are a little less than 15,000 for arms and tummy. He seems to be a little pricier, but I'm more comfortable with him. Let me know if there's anything else I can answer. Connie