Need help one more time!

Hello everyone!  I've been in and out of here for two years but I am ready to start getting more involved because I realize I really need help!  Some of you know I lost my husband a little over a year ago.  I feel like I'm just now really coming out of the shock...I had my lapband (realize) surgery in July 2008.  I've only lost about 50 or 55 pounds.  I lost 15 of those the week after Billy died.  I haven't even tried to eat right the past year.  I just haven't cared about myself.  I need to start caring though because I have two wonderful daughters and 5 precious grandkids that I love dearly and I know love me.  If anyone here has a lapband, please tell me what you think I'm doing wrong.  In the morning I have some restriction and eat very little...but in the afternoon and evening, I can eat anything with no problem!  Does that sound like I need to go get a fill? I've been gone so long I'm going to have to reeducate myself.  I also have a sweet tooth and eat too much ice cream. I know that's one habit that will have to end, but I need some food suggestions that are quick and easy so I'm not so tempted by sweets.  I don't cook anymore...partly due to having fibromyalgia and being in pain all the time...partly because it's just me here.  I also have a fear of losing  the weight for some reason...and I doubt if I can have surgery if I did lose the weight to get rid of all the extra skin hanging around.  I know exercise would help but I can't do much. I already feel like a bowl of jello so what would it be like if I lost all the weight! I know I've been eating and not caring because my heart was so broken when I lost my husband but I feel like I'm starting to heal emotionally and I need to start healing physically now too.  Thanks for any help! 

First of all, I am sooooo sorry for your loss.  I lost my mother and best friend 4 years ago.  It was the most traumatic thing I've ever been thru.... so I can only imagine what the loss of a spouse is like.  I'm sure you've heard it a million times, but its true.... time does make it better.  My dad was in a depression for about 2 years... but he is doing much better now.  :)

I applaud you for reaching out and wanting to get back into things.... that is a great sign and a great first step!!  I can't blame you one bit for not thinking or caring much about weight loss and what you should or shouldn't be eating during this past difficult year!!

Unfortunately, I don't have a band, so I can't be a lot of help with that.  I just had gastric sleeve surgery with Dr. Baker almost 3 weeks ago.  So this is all new to me.  One thing I could suggest though is maybe getting involved with the bariatric support group that meets at Baptist  hospital.  Have you ever been?  They aren't having a september meeting because of the Walk from Obesity.  So the next meeting will be Oct. 14th.  That will be my first meeting and I am looking forward to it!

Also, I live in Benton too!  :)   I am a massage therapist at Wild Ivy Salon.  If you would like to meet and come get a massage, I think that would be very good for you.  It can be good for fibromyalgia.  I'll give you half price  :)

Best of luck to you!  Hang in there!!

--shelley

Oh.....I LOVE Wild Ivy!! I live in Alexander and am a stylist/nail tech in WLR. Our MT only works part time and I hate to take up what time she's there for myself. What do you charge?  Just might have to come see you!

See my post about the meeting schedule.....IT'S CHANGED!!!

Susan-

I believe I met you at one of the pre-op support group meetings a few months back.  I talked to you and another girl who had lap band for a while after the meeting.

I would love to see you at Wild Ivy!  We charge $70 for and hour and $40 for half hour.  But I'll give ya $10 off.      I work thursday-saturday.

Thanks for telling me about the schedule change!  If I don't see ya at wildy ivy, I will definitely see you at a meeting!

Hi Jeannie!!!

Golly, it's so good to see you, and I'm glad you're coming out of the dark fog you've been in. Nothing can compare to the loss you've suffered, but it sounds like better times are coming.

I think you need to see Dr Baker. Tell him what's going on and maybe get a fill to jump start things. What could it hurt? It might be just what you need.

You would be so welcome at our support groups at Baptist!!! I'm posting the schedule on a seperate post because it's changed.

Take care, get back to basics and get rid of that junk food in your house. Throw it away, give it away, but don't get rid of it by eating it!!!

Take care!

Thanks to both of you for writing back! I'm pretty sick of myself and was embarrassed to even come back...but I have to keep trying or I'll never figure it all out!  I need to change my info because I am living in Hot Springs now...but I do get massages now and then and they do help so much!  Thank you for your sweet offer!  I do need to come to the meetings and get more involved.  I am going to do my best to do that...and to come here more.  The last year before Billy's death was a tough one and I didn't think I had time to take care of myself but that can't be an excuse anymore!  Yes, I will call Dr. Baker and go get a fill. I called him today but noone answered so maybe tomorrow I can get an appointment.  Susan, I hope you're doing well!  We still need to go have that coffee sometime!  :)

I am still here. I do not post on here because I have regained my weight back and do not want to be a downer to the newbies. I am on facebook tho. 
I am glad your doing better. I have thought of you daily and wished I were closer to help you through the dark days you have been through.
I may not be the perfect role model at this point of my journey but I am still here to listen if you want to get in touch with me.     marionmom2011@hotmail.com


hugs
Tammy.

awww...You're still beautiful.  I appreciate your thoughts so much...I wish you lived closer too!!!  :)  I'm on FB too.  I will look for you...and you do the same...ok?  Right now my profile picture is my cat.  I will try to write soon...Thanks for getting in touch!

yay you found me.....I am soo happy!!!!