Anyone ever had or having trouble.......

getting used to the new body image??  I know this sounds strange, since I feel better than I have ever felt, and they say I look better than Ive ever looked, but Im dealing with issues of my new body.  When I pass a mirror, I dont recognize myself, when people compliment me, I dont know how to respond.  Dont get me wrong, I am soooooo greatful for this oppurtunity to get my life back, but I dont know how to handle it.   Sets in like an odd sort of depression, does that make any sense??  If anyone has been thru this, could they tell me how they coped with it, I need some ideas.   Thanks to all my OH friends who are here and seem to understand these issues like no one else can. Love you all, The New Rhonda

one of the hardest things I have encountered is seeing myself smaller. I still see 233. I too dont really know how to handle a compliment. I guess maybe because for so many years we questioned how we really looked and if someone said we werent fat when we were or no our behinds dont look big in those stretch pants.....when we looked like a greyhound bus.....those things are in our heads.

no lie ,one day i was trying on shoes in a store and saw myself in the mirror and told my husband there was a girl in the store with the same clothes on as me....it took a second to realize it WAS ME. it actually scared me....for many years I did not look in the mirror prior to surgery. look at my recent pics....that is not what I see in the mirror everyday. It is very hard. The best thing you can do about compliments is thank the person and tell yourself it is true this time...not someones way of sugar coating as to not hurt your feelings. our lives are forever changed and sadly some marriages end once the over weight person loses weight. I guess they find new self confidence as well. My marriage ended but it was troubled before surgery....but the weight loss showed me I did not need him.....I was ready to get my first real job and go to the store. I was ready to be independent and take care of myself. He blames the weight.....I blame his affairs. today I struggle with my weight. I want to be in the 140's but am up to the 158-160 area. It is my fault I re-gained. I was also mentally abused by my first husband because of my weight. He called me a fat who*e when I was about to have our daughter....daily. So I have major issues with how I look. I am not happy where I am but I know I am better than I was 10 years ago. Sometimes you notice people looking at you....maybe they always did but now you walk with confidence and you notice it. I always walked with my head down so I never saw it if they looked at me. Now I walk with pride....even though I am chubby...cute but chubby. lol Your a new person.....grasp it and enjoy it. Your just beginning a new life.....many changes are in store for you. hope this helps. Tam I Am I really dont know how to answer you. I can only say that I think everyone goes through it.

Yeah, Im noticing more folks checking me out, just like this afternoon, we went to town and I had on a spaghetti strap shirt and when I came out of the gas station, there were 2 older men checking me out and when I got in the truck, Mike was smiling.  I was like, What, and he said, "hows it feel to be checked out by 2 old men?" Isnt it awful how our supposed friends and family can put such awful thoughts and self images to us.  By the way You were beautiful before, but you are simply stunning now!!!  You go girl, you are such an inspiration to me. Hugs, The New Rhonda

Nope, you're not alone.  Almost every day someone at the salon says "you're so tiny".  Not a word that has ever been used to describe me!  I don't feel tiny, I have to say I don't feel like I'm 100 lbs heavier, but tiny, slim, skinny thing, petite, nooooooooooo. Makes me wonder how long, if ever, I'll see myself as what I am instead of what I was. I've noticed too that men talk to me now. When we were in Vegas for Jeff's wedding, guys spoke to me in the elevator, or just around. Felt kind of weird. DH thought it was cool. Guess I was invisible before. This is quite the journey, isn't it?

Whew - it sure is good to know I'm not alone. It has been so odd getting all the comments about getting "skinny". I try to just be grateful and say Thank You and go on. I think we suffer with distorted body image for so many years that it's hard to see our bodies as they really are. I wore a sleeveless dress to work the other day, and ended up coming home at lunch and changing clothes. I was so uncomfortable and felt like I didn't need to be showing my arms. I had gotten several compliments but I still wasn't comfortable. I don't feel depressed about it, but it is certainly overwhelming at times and hard to know how to deal with it. But I agree with Susan - oh what a journey!

I must also add that with the new boobs....ummmm I get lots of looks. Teenage boys too!!! Whats up with that???

6 years later and people still look.....I think we are very aware of it now because we have this new self confidence.  I do not look like I am 37 so I think that has alot to do with it. My 18 year old daughters friends think I look about 25 if that. One of the "boys" always asks me out...even though I tell him I am old enough to be his mom. Just take those looks and compliments and keep them fresh in your mind so that if you are having a bad day or feel "fat"...you can look back and recall them. It is all a part of this life long journey we are on.

thank you for the compliment....all of us are stunning as well. We just have to get past our mind seeing the former us in the mirror. This is not easy for us. I have said numerous times it is a mental recovery not so much physical.

have a great day huggs Tam I am!!! oh yeah...I walked almost 2 miles this morning.....I am getting back on track.