heads still turn

if I was in a good mood the fact that 3 men checked me out yesterday would have made my day. Even though one one guy almost wrecked the company truck he was in. Guess I dont look as bad as I feel or think I look. The last two nights I have slept. Only to wake up one time each night at 3am. I have been able to eat too. Maybe it is getting better. I dont know.  I am trying to figure out how to get rid of these last 23 or so pounds. I guess a trip to the gym would do it. I have equipment at home....but....too lazy. I have no energy. I have no will.  It really sucks being almost 6 years out and still trying to lose weight after hitting goal briefly then re-gaining. It is very depressing and stressful. Weight loss is a viscious circle. Have any of you heard of  "abdominal grafting"?  I am thinking of checking into this. I believe it is for people who have stomache muscles. As opposed to a tummy tuck where the muscle is tightened and so on and so forth. I have stomach muscles and just need skin and fat removed. I look like I have had a baby.  Maybe lipo is an option. My new boobs will be paid off in 3 years so I am considering something with my tummy. If anyone knows anything about the differences between the two please let me know. Well I am gonna go....... tammy

See, that's gotta make you feel better. Although I have to say, seeing a guy wreck his truck 'cause he was checking me out would have been a hoot. Makes the $$ spent on "the girls" worthwhile. Glad you've been able to get some rest, try not to look at the clock when you get up during the night. That little tidbit comes from my sleep doctor, keeps you from getting your mind going. The gym......not a bad idea, maybe there's more guys there to check you out, then you'll want to go more often, then, who knows???? Love ya

Thank you Susan. Your care and concern means alot to me.

I guess one of the reasons this has been so hard is Louie was like a little kid. He needed me to take care of him. Also he was the only person and or animal who was happy to see me. My kids are those rebellious teenagers and dont want to see mom...unless she has food or money. So I truly feel like I have lost a small child. I am checking on the gym.....a new one is opening here in Marion......I dont want to go to West Memphis. The money I have spent on my body should turn heads......8500.00 on boobs and about 27000.00 on my RNY. I am serious about my tummy....either a tuck or grafting. I hold my stomach in all the time.....to the point my ribs stick out...it is habit.......if I walk around with out holding it in I would look about 17 months pregnant. Well I gotta go....today has to be a good day. It gets hard when it is time to go home as he isnt there to love and kiss me.....so the 5 oclock hour sucks for me. Once again, thank you love Tammy

it is gettiing better each day with out Louie. Yesterday I started landscaping where we buried him. Cutting down dead branches and getting the groung ready to build a flower garden. Yesterday was 3 weeks. It is getting better. Thank you for the compliment......I still see a fat girl in the mirror...guess maybe you never get over those mental images especially if you were mentally abused about your weight.

The girls...women or twins....we just like them and include them in daily conversations....they are family too......actually I really enjoy them. I feel a bit more confident in the clothes I wear. Everyone needs a good set of girls.... have a good day Tammy