i need YOUR help old timers..and newbies too i guess.

Im at my wits end. I havent been on the board because i havent been a good example. IM having some major issues with myself. Mainly of course, this weight. The scale wont budge and when it does...it goes up. I go to the doctor tomorrow. A surgeon that took Dr Chandlers patients. Its the first time in 3 years ive been to a weight loss doctor. Im so nervous. I can feel the torture beginning already. I weighed 170 when i was in 3 years ago. now im up close to 30lbs heavier and i just know he'll ***** and gripe. BUT ive tried and tried and tried. I do soooooo good for weeks and then its like i have a major case of head hunger and i'll eat bad stuff for a whole week. Its like my head sabatoging my body. I KNOW what im doing wrong atleast most of it. I dont feel like im doing wrong all the time and i do great for weeks and wont lose a single pound. Thats a struggle for me. i DONT want to be at 200lbs for the rest of my life. I'd REALLY like to get back down to 165lbs.. Whats your advice and how did YOU lose the regain? I feel like ive cut out most of the bad stuff. except yesterday i beat myself up all day because i had a HALF of a ham and cheese sandwich for lunch. I get so sick of protein shakes, so im clueless as to what to eat for breakfast because Protein shakes have always been my morning thing. i dont have time to actually sit down and eat, unless i do it when i get to work at 8. I am just lonely here in the weightloss world i feel. So what do i do? instead of coming for support, i shy away and dont talk about it. So today is my day to pour my heart out.. Im actually just very nervous about going to the doctor tomorrow. I know i need to go because my body is all out of whack vitamin wise. But im so ashamed that ive had this surgery and im still so heavy. I just dont know what to do anymore. Obviously what i thought was RIGHT isnt.. or i'd be losing weight. I just dont know and im so confused

I know this is long and is repeating the same thing over and over, but im just confused and needed to get it OUT.

Hugs Hilary! Your not alone. I too am 5 years out and haven't seen a WLS doc for 3 years. I am struggling too. I have put on a vast amount of weight and need to loose it! All I can recommend is just take what the doctor dishes. I still believe to this day that even though I lost all the weight easily, the emotional part is the hardest. I know what I am doing wrong too, I just haven't hit rock bottom yet I guess because I haven't corrected it. I know there is an emotional issue there that I haven't quite got a handle on.

Good luck to you sweetie and thanks for this post. It's been an eye opener for me and might be as well to many new WLS patients.

I know I haven't given you any words of wisdon but I do want you to know you are not alone.

Much love,
Gail

THANKS :) i guess i dont know what rock bottom is. I mean i said "ill never let myself get over 200lbs again" but days it happens. the scale says 205 and then it'll be back down to 199. i just dont know what to do. I plan to ask for the doctors help. Dr Chandler retired right before i was one year post op. Ive never been to see anyone since. Ive never seen a nutritionalist or anything after that. So i think i need guidance. im just so nervous about taking his wrath. I never thought i'd be so hard to LOSE again. I lost so easily in the beginning. I was a slower loser but i was under drs goal of 175 before i was one year post op. I quit losing at 1 year and its been a up hill climb since. im ready to go back downhill!!!! We can do this.. but we have to do it together :)

I am here Hilary and more than willing to work on this with you. There are a lot of wonderful people here and with their help and our commitment, I know it can be done. We are WORTH it!

I am starting slow....I have to chai latte detox. I know I am drinking my calories and not getting in enough protein. Today I vow to drink 64 ounces of water.

Good luck and I am sure the doc can't be that bad. Let me know what he says too! I am curious!

I'm a newbie, so I haven't been through this yet....but I appreciate seeing what the future holds.  We had surgery on our insides, not our brains.  Obesity is a disease of the entire body, and our heads may never be "cured". 

Now, just look at the science of weight:  Calories in vs. calories burned.  Are you exercising?  and I mean REALLY exercising?  We should be doing a good workout at least 5 days a week.  Also, have you tried the old rule "protein first" and try to stick to a low carb higher protein diet?  More and more research is pointing to this as a healthier way for us to eat.

I am glad you are going back to the WL surgeon.  You still have much to celebrate!  Yes, you've had some regain, but you are no where near where you were, and I'll be you never had this much control in the past to catch it this soon.  Hats off to you for addressing it now! 

I'm also glad you came back to the board!  I missed you, you are an inspiration to me.  Please let us know how the dr. visit goes, and stop beating yourself up......go back and look at your before pics and celebrate how far you've come!

Kim

you got it right. they did surgery on our stomach not our brains. this is a huge thing for me. i need head surgery bad.

I do NOT exercise. Ive TRIED to do the good workout 5 days a week but i cant. im a single mom with jayden in kindergarten there is NO way for me to go to the gym early mornings before and no way after work. I plan to buy an eleptical this year but so far i dont have enough money saved.

I DO try to do the protein first rule. Somedays are harder than others. Like i said, i do really good for weeks and then i'll have a few off weeks.

My advice to you newbies is please make it a lifestyle change. It never, ever gets easier than it was in the beginning. you will begin to eat more than you once could hold. i wish that i had never experimented with sweets as i dont dump. now i crave them.

Hilary--I don't have advice for you--I am sure you know more about this than I do.  I just want you to know I am so sorry you are frustrated and in pain--and I am here for you if you need me.

Exercise is the key.  You have got to exercise.  Can i ask what is wrong with half of ham and cheese sandwich?  I have had one of those pure protein bars.  Keeps me full all day.  I have to make myself eat later.  Maybe you just need to start from the beginning and do the 5 day pouch test.  I dont know.  Im hear for you.

I try to get in as much movement as possible. i climb the stairs at work numerous times and i park as far away from any building as possible.. Other than that, right now its not in the cards to get in anymore exercise. Maybe to some nothing is wrong with the ham and cheese, i just cant do bread. if i start on bread i crave it all day. Bread is the devil for me. Ive tried those pure protein bars. may i ask which ones you eat? Imaybe it was the kind i was eating but they make me wanna throw up.
Ive done the 5 day pouch test numerous times and it does work for a little while. I hope the doctor has some inspiration for me. I just dont know what else to do. i go back to the basics and still dont lose any.

I am so glad that you got it out. We are still food addicts. I would suggest you get back involved in a local support group as well. Hold yourself accountable and let others hold you accountable.
I have a really good local support group. I have gained 43lbs back! I went on steriods for migraines and started blocks and each month more weight. I changed doctors. My new neurologist said, "well, how did that work for you?" I replied "well 43 pounds heavier and still got the migraines" He replied "yeah I don't recommend blocks nor do I recommend steriods unless you have to have a one time drip for a migraine that is ongoing'. So now I have been almost 3 weeks without steriods. I would be 30 days but I had a 3 day migraine and I had to have a drip in my Port. He did start me on some medication that will help drop the weight off but it didn't come on overnight and it won't go off overnight. I am so depressed by it too!! I just don't even want to leave the house. I admit I drink coffee in the a.m. and don't eat. And sometimes if i have a migraine I don't leave my bedroom! ;(
And today I had nothing for breakfast well, coffee with equal and then for lunch I had half a hamburger patty leftover from last night with half piece of cheese. For dinner I don't know yet what I am eating! But I am going to get this weight off. I am starting an exercise class on Thursday offered by my church.. and I am going to be more involved here.
My next support group meeting is September 15th! And I have 6 wonderful ladies who are always ready to help and hold us all accountable!! We are more than a group we are friends.
I have them over to my lazy river. Now that might be my problem. I'm in the lazy river being lazy!
I sit all day long Hilary so I know how you feel reading this post and posting makes me feel so much better. Now all of us can come out and accept what is.. is.. and what are we going to do to change it?
I'm also blessed I have a husband who is not afraid to say to me.. you've gained weight and that is not the best food option for you! He even cooks!