Wake Up Call (long)
Okay everybody, this is going to be long. I went for my blood work and got some bad news that I guess can be good news in the long run. I just wanted to share with my OH Bama Board Family. I haven't been here like I should have been supporting others and I hope to change that.
My doctor sent me for this test called a Calcium Deposit Scorer, because my cholesterol was up again. I thought it was because he is obsessed with cholesterol...his new specialty. He told me that if I was in the 90 percentile of women my age he would schedule a stress test and if I was in the 25 percentile we would just go with doubling my zocor which we did that day. He told me to 'move my butt' which he has been saying all along.
The test is a CT of the heart, the most accurate picture of the heart available. The CT is done at a very fast rate of speed and does cuts of the heart that shows the hard clacium deposits or hard plaque in your arteries. They show you the results on a computer right after they do the test, after it is compared to the women in your age group throughout the country. I read the brochure whiile I was waiting so I knew what a healthy heart looked like and what one with deposits looked like. When I walked in and saw my heart on the screen, I saw lots of deposits! My numbers are in he moderate to high range and the majority of the deposits are in the left main and the left descending arteries. The paperwork they gave me said I, with my doctors guidance might need to be on aspirin therapy, and if I should feel lightheaded, heaviness in my chest, nauseous, tingling in my left arm, etc...seek immediate medical attention. It also I was in the medium to high range for having a sudden heart attack.
I WAS SHOCKED TO SAY THE LEAST. I WILL or should I say HAVE changed my ways. I never thought of me having a heart problem. I have been having light headedness and didn't mention it to my doctor. I have been calling it dizzyness because I have had equilibrium problems in the past, but when they tested me last year, they said I DO NOT have inner ear problems. I thought they were wrong. DUH!! Boy do I feel foolish now.
Sorry to go on and on, but I am still in shock I guesss and when I ready what Amy was asking and the innocence with which she was asking it...something snapped in me and I realized that as WLS patients, either we don't get enough info from our doctors and staff, or we don't 'hear' what that say. It made me realize that I have the responsibility as a almost 5 year veteran to share my experience with the newbies on this board. I have not been doing that, and this isn't fair to the newbies or me. I need to support others for them and for me. It helps me to stay on track when I am sharing with others. I can't live in denial as I have been for quite some time.
My life depends on my sharing my WLS journey with others. Not just for me, but also for them. I read a post from a newbie yesterday and when I started to answer her that is when it all came together for me. I had already realized the lifestyle changes I had to make. I have got to start exercising and I know I need to wait until I talk to my doctor and have the stress test. I can start walking and stop sitting on my butt so much. I am lazy! I have always said I am sedentary (sp). I read a joke somewhere online yesterday that said that is just a fancy word for lazy and I realized that it is, but it is NO JOKE!!
I want to publicly apologize to all those newbie who have asked for advice that I have ignored because I was "too busy" and all those others who were not so new who needed someone to support them and I again was "too busy". I'm not saying I have not cared. I have and I do care and I have always been on this board since the summer of 2004, but I now realize that I could have done so much more. I now realize that when I started gaining weight and doing that things that I knew I shouldn't, I went in to denial and mostly subconsciously...I don't think it was consciously, but maybe that is more denial...I started lurking more and for the most part didn't respond to requests for support. I did respond to some that just grabbed me and I couldn't ignore, consciously or subconsciously so I guess I wasn't a total lost cause, but I AM TRULY SORRY AND PLAN TO DO MUCH, MUCH BETTER.
I know this is long and if you stayed with me this long I want to thank you and if you are a praying person please keep me in your prayers that I can do this for me, my family both biological and this OH Bama Board Family that does mean the world to me. Thank you and I love you all!
My doctor sent me for this test called a Calcium Deposit Scorer, because my cholesterol was up again. I thought it was because he is obsessed with cholesterol...his new specialty. He told me that if I was in the 90 percentile of women my age he would schedule a stress test and if I was in the 25 percentile we would just go with doubling my zocor which we did that day. He told me to 'move my butt' which he has been saying all along.
The test is a CT of the heart, the most accurate picture of the heart available. The CT is done at a very fast rate of speed and does cuts of the heart that shows the hard clacium deposits or hard plaque in your arteries. They show you the results on a computer right after they do the test, after it is compared to the women in your age group throughout the country. I read the brochure whiile I was waiting so I knew what a healthy heart looked like and what one with deposits looked like. When I walked in and saw my heart on the screen, I saw lots of deposits! My numbers are in he moderate to high range and the majority of the deposits are in the left main and the left descending arteries. The paperwork they gave me said I, with my doctors guidance might need to be on aspirin therapy, and if I should feel lightheaded, heaviness in my chest, nauseous, tingling in my left arm, etc...seek immediate medical attention. It also I was in the medium to high range for having a sudden heart attack.
I WAS SHOCKED TO SAY THE LEAST. I WILL or should I say HAVE changed my ways. I never thought of me having a heart problem. I have been having light headedness and didn't mention it to my doctor. I have been calling it dizzyness because I have had equilibrium problems in the past, but when they tested me last year, they said I DO NOT have inner ear problems. I thought they were wrong. DUH!! Boy do I feel foolish now.
Sorry to go on and on, but I am still in shock I guesss and when I ready what Amy was asking and the innocence with which she was asking it...something snapped in me and I realized that as WLS patients, either we don't get enough info from our doctors and staff, or we don't 'hear' what that say. It made me realize that I have the responsibility as a almost 5 year veteran to share my experience with the newbies on this board. I have not been doing that, and this isn't fair to the newbies or me. I need to support others for them and for me. It helps me to stay on track when I am sharing with others. I can't live in denial as I have been for quite some time.
My life depends on my sharing my WLS journey with others. Not just for me, but also for them. I read a post from a newbie yesterday and when I started to answer her that is when it all came together for me. I had already realized the lifestyle changes I had to make. I have got to start exercising and I know I need to wait until I talk to my doctor and have the stress test. I can start walking and stop sitting on my butt so much. I am lazy! I have always said I am sedentary (sp). I read a joke somewhere online yesterday that said that is just a fancy word for lazy and I realized that it is, but it is NO JOKE!!
I want to publicly apologize to all those newbie who have asked for advice that I have ignored because I was "too busy" and all those others who were not so new who needed someone to support them and I again was "too busy". I'm not saying I have not cared. I have and I do care and I have always been on this board since the summer of 2004, but I now realize that I could have done so much more. I now realize that when I started gaining weight and doing that things that I knew I shouldn't, I went in to denial and mostly subconsciously...I don't think it was consciously, but maybe that is more denial...I started lurking more and for the most part didn't respond to requests for support. I did respond to some that just grabbed me and I couldn't ignore, consciously or subconsciously so I guess I wasn't a total lost cause, but I AM TRULY SORRY AND PLAN TO DO MUCH, MUCH BETTER.
I know this is long and if you stayed with me this long I want to thank you and if you are a praying person please keep me in your prayers that I can do this for me, my family both biological and this OH Bama Board Family that does mean the world to me. Thank you and I love you all!
Christ's peace,
Connie aka Teal Rose
Connie....first of all...you have always been an inspiration to me. From the first time I met you, I knew that you were a very special lady. You are going on my prayer list and I am believing that you are going to be well very soon. I too have stopped exercising. When my Curves location shut down, I did too. That is awful. I walked for a while, but just stopped. I am guilty too, Connie of not helping newbies enough. Thank you for posting this and the other reply on the thread. They really made me think. I love you!!!!
Gosh, I love you Connie! You are one great lady who leads this board with openness, love and caring words. I couldn't never imagine you being "too busy" for anyone on this board! I will definately keep you in my prayers. We need to have "our time" soon...I will be contacting you soon, okay? I love you my friend!
With Love,
Jackie
Oh Janice,
What a sweet thing to say. Thank you very much. With much help from good friends and many prayers, I am sure I can do it.
By the way, welcome to Alabama. I read on a post that you might have found a place. I hope you will be very happy with us in the south!!
Christ's peace,
Connie aka Teal Rose
(((Connie))
I always knew what your calling was; whether you knew it or not. You helped light a fire in my life to do things I never imagined. So know you are such an inspiration.
It always takes hard work and support is the top thing on the list. Whether it be a support group; a spouse or a friend; or these boards.
I find myself busy alot of times but I try to stay committed to my family, my friends and my local support group. I know together we can do this. It's choices. Choice to stay part of the group; choices to pick the right thing to eat or drink and choice to stay on track.
I make mistakes; I had surgery but I am still a food addict. That has not changed but with the help of my wonderful support system I have the choice each day to begin again.
I am praying your tests come back well. And if I can help you with anything I hope to be there for you the way you have always been there for me. I love ya!!!
I always knew what your calling was; whether you knew it or not. You helped light a fire in my life to do things I never imagined. So know you are such an inspiration.
It always takes hard work and support is the top thing on the list. Whether it be a support group; a spouse or a friend; or these boards.
I find myself busy alot of times but I try to stay committed to my family, my friends and my local support group. I know together we can do this. It's choices. Choice to stay part of the group; choices to pick the right thing to eat or drink and choice to stay on track.
I make mistakes; I had surgery but I am still a food addict. That has not changed but with the help of my wonderful support system I have the choice each day to begin again.
I am praying your tests come back well. And if I can help you with anything I hope to be there for you the way you have always been there for me. I love ya!!!
"DON'T WORRY ABOUT TOMMORROW, GOD IS ALREADY THERE!"
JULIE 
Certified OH Support Group Leader - Weigh Down (Baldwin County)
RNY 1/17/06
Hey Julie,
I was wondering where you were. Thank you for the kind words. I really appreciate it. I did back off of everything for a while because of feeling overwhelmed. But, I know this is something I can't back off of. For my own health and becuase support is in my heart and soul. I do feel that it is a calling and wish I could do it for a living, but alas I don't have the educational background and unfortunately have o work for a living! 
I hope to be more invoived in thelocal support group when it starts back up in the fall. Lee and Sandy have decided to break for the summer and try to start back up in September. I haven't been there for them at all and I am sorry for that. I know how it is when people don't come and you put your heart and soul in trying to bring support to people.
Sorry, here I go again. I'm gonna go check FB real qui k and get off this computer. I've been on it for hours and my vision is starting to blur!! LOL
Christ's peace,
Connie aka Teal Rose
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