Southernisms
1. A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.
0A 6. It is not a shopping cart, it's a buggy.
7. 'Jaw-P?' means, 'Did y'all go to the bathroom?
8. People actually grow and eat okra
9. 'Fixinto' is one word.
10. There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Iced tea is good at all meals, and we start drinking it when we are two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
12. Backwards and forwards means, 'I know everything about you.'
13. The word 'jeet' means, 'Did you eat?
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is. You wor****il you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. We don't PUSH buttons, you MASH 'um.
16. We measure distance in minutes.
17. We switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
18. All the festivals in the South are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
19. We know what a 'DAWG is.
20. We carry jumper cables in our car --- for our OWN car.
21. We only own five spices: salt, pepper, Texas Pete, Tabasco and Ketchup.
22. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and high school football.
23. We think that the first day of deer season is a national ho
liday.
24. We find 105 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm.
25. We know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
26. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World.
27. We describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good hog killin' weather.
28. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
29. We don't need no dang driver's ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
30. If you understand this, send it on to your Southern friends and those who just wish they were from the South.
I gotta gonow, it's pert near bedtime. The chickens is already roostin'.
2. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in the South.
3. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 of them live in the South.
4. If it grows, it'll stick ya. If it crawls, it'll bite cha.
5. 'Onced' and 'Twiced' are words.
0A 6. It is not a shopping cart, it's a buggy.
7. 'Jaw-P?' means, 'Did y'all go to the bathroom?
8. People actually grow and eat okra
9. 'Fixinto' is one word.
10. There is no such thing as 'lunch.' There is only dinner and then there is supper.
11. Iced tea is good at all meals, and we start drinking it when we are two. We do like a little tea with our sugar.
12. Backwards and forwards means, 'I know everything about you.'
13. The word 'jeet' means, 'Did you eat?
14. You don't have to wear a watch, because it doesn't matter what time it is. You wor****il you're done or it's too dark to see.
15. We don't PUSH buttons, you MASH 'um.
16. We measure distance in minutes.
17. We switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
18. All the festivals in the South are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
19. We know what a 'DAWG is.
20. We carry jumper cables in our car --- for our OWN car.
21. We only own five spices: salt, pepper, Texas Pete, Tabasco and Ketchup.
22. The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and high school football.
23. We think that the first day of deer season is a national ho
liday.
24. We find 105 degrees Fahrenheit 'a bit warm.
25. We know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
26. Going to Wal-Mart is a favorite past time known as 'goin' Wal-Martin' or 'off to Wally World.
27. We describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good hog killin' weather.
28. Fried catfish is the other white meat.
29. We don't need no dang driver's ed. If our mama says we can drive, we can drive dag-nabbit.
30. If you understand this, send it on to your Southern friends and those who just wish they were from the South.
I gotta gonow, it's pert near bedtime. The chickens is already roostin'.
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