What I want in a man

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What I Want In a Man As Years Go By....     Original List: - Handsome - Charming - Financially successful - A caring listener - Witty - In good shape - Dresses with style - Appreciates finer things - Full of thoughtful surprises - An imaginative, romantic lover What I Want in a Man, Revised List: (age 32) - Nice looking - Opens car doors, holds chairs - Has enough money for a nice dinner - Listens more than talks - Laughs at my jokes - Carries bags of groceries with ease - Owns at least one tie - Appreciates a good home-cooked meal - Remembers birthdays and anniversaries - Seeks romance at least once a week What I Want in a Man, Revised List: (age 52) - Not too ugly - Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car - Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally - Nods head when I'm talking - Usually remember*****h lines of jokes - Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture - Wears a shirt that covers his stomach - Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids - Remembers to put the toilet seat down - Shaves most weekends What I Want in a Man, Revised List: (age 62) - Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed - Doesn't belch or scratch in public - Doesn't borrow money too often - Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting - Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times - Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends - Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear - Appreciates a good TV dinner - Remembers my name on occasion - Shaves some weekends What I Want in a Man, Revised List: (age 72) - Doesn't scare small children - Remembers where bathroom is - Doesn't require much money for upkeep - Only snores lightly when asleep - Remembers why he's laughing - Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself - Usually wears some clothes - Likes soft foods- Remembers where he left his teeth - Remembers that it's the weekend What I Want in a Man, Revised List: (age 82) - Breathing - Doesn't miss the toilet...

My Dad is 82...and he is jewel by these standards:

He:
drives his own 2006 completely paid for Dodge pickup
wears clothes that actually match and look presentable
can wash dishes, but prefers to stack in sink with water over them
will mop the floor
never misses the toliet
always puts the toliet seat down
laughs at most jokes I send him from this board
can remember the names and faces of the people who were at the Halloween party last year
asks about OH board members and may lurk on occasions
can operate a computer, but doesn't type
can pay his bills and does
has all of his hair, a fine shock of white hair
keeps his ears, nose, and back appropriately trimmed
wears clean underwear daily
shaves at least every other day
takes at least one shower a day, more if he has a date
reads
watches the news and knows what is going on in the world
volunteers for Red Cross
mows his own and the neighbor's yard
loves pets
insist that his sheet get changed once a month whether they need it or not...heeheehee
doesn't do gross stuff in public, i.e. belch, pass gas, pick nose, etc.
will hold the door
can buy groceries
bakes birthday cakes for just about every waitress in town and all of our friends
loves me and my dog
And loved my mother with all his heart.  His words to my dying mother were, "Don't you ever forget that I love you."

Now, I think he is a catch and he is an exceptional father.

LOL........NOW that is hilarious!!!!!